DISCLAIMER: "Invader ZIM" and its characters are property of Jhonen Vasquez and Nickelodeon. I do not intend to make any profits off of this story…that is, if you would call this a story really.
How You Can Change the World
Introduction
A month ago, skool teacher Mr. Elliot sponsored an essay writing contest. The topic: how you can change the world. The children would write in a three hundred to four hundred word essay explaining how they would change the world in order to better mankind. Out of one thousand students, he only received six entries (one of which wasn't even from a student). The following entries you are about to read are the essays and eclectic responses as to how one person can change the world…
"How You Can Change the World"
by ZIM!!!
I suppose there are many ways that a normal human earth child (like I so clearly am!) would like to change this stupendous world. I guess we would all want there to never have another rainy day ever again. That would ruin my very, very rare yet normal skin condition. Every day would bring a wondrous filth ray of color… I mean, a rainbow to spread across this wretched land making every hideous man, woman and worm baby dance and sing with glee and pitiful happiness. I hope to bring about this amazing change to the world by handing out to each and every human with one of those stinky miniature versions of human dog monsters…puppies. Yes, puppies. Each puppy will have such dreadfully cute bugged little eyes like the wide-eyed Throkalaqke and a soft fluffy exterior like the hairy, matted Bughjalee. Those are totally normal rare human earth monsters…in, uh, different parts of the planet. I think. Anyways, the humans will be required to train these puppies to bring both joy and utmost doom by making them bring more and more bones. Then once all the bones are gone, they'll have grown stronger and hungrier for even more bones so they'll go after the humans for their bone supply!! But of course, the humans will think these puppy specimen will want to constantly play and lick their oily, greasy skin! Little do they know that they will have developed keen sniffing senses for human bones and they'll destroy the humans and wipe out their entire filthy race…
That is, making the humans go to live on that rainbow ray because they all love bright, blinding colors, and never ending sunshine and an eternity without rain. This, leaving me to have the world all for ZIM!! Conqueror ZIM!!
Oh. Yes. That's how a normal, typical human earth child like me plans to change the world one day. Soon. So very, very soon…