Author's Note: Alright. I know I've been MIA, but I'd feel horrible if I didn't complete my promise of writing a one-shot for the secret Santa. So here it is!! This one is of course, for the-Sara. Merry Christmas!

Forget Me:

Looks like I'm starting all over again,

These last three years were just pretend.

-Michelle Branch

Pulse racing, heart beat erratic and pain that won't go away. Those were the first things that crossed her mind as she lay wherever the hell she was. She dug her hands into the ground beneath her and slowly got onto her hands and knees before searching around. There was absolutely no doubt about where she was.

She was lying in the exact same spot she had been before she'd decided to detonate a hydrogen bomb with a rock. Only one question rang through her head now, why did the Swan still look like it had before? Why was there still debris and scaffolding over top of her? What was the point in risking everything when nothing appeared to have changed?

Why didn't she feel as though her entire body was broken anymore? Question after question and yet she was getting no answer, no salvation. The pain was lingering but hardly there at this point and finally Juliet managed to force herself to her feet despite the aching throughout her body. There was no way she should be able to stand right now. She shouldn't be alive, yet here she stood at the bottom of a pit.

What was she supposed to do from fifty feet beneath the ground? It took her a moment to find her voice through the shock before she called out. "James!"

Once. Twice. Three times.

No response.

She leaned her back against the dirt wall and felt herself forcing back tears. Then again, what was the point in holding them back? It wasn't as though the scaffolding would chastise her for the tears. Weakness, why was her life such a tragedy? Perhaps Sawyer had been right during a conversation their first year in the 70's. Perhaps her namesake was her downfall... Juliet, a romantic tragedy. The bitter aftertaste of defeat flooded her taste buds.

Dying obviously would have been too easy for the person who wished to torture her so endlessly. "James!!" she cried out, trying just once more and hoping he might be up there to hear her.

It took a moment but she heard noise from above. Maybe someone didn't hate her as much as she'd been beginning to think.

"You hear that?"

"Hear what?"

Juliet nearly collapsed in defeat. That wasn't Sawyer. It sounded like Horace and somebody else that she couldn't quite place. She couldn't quite decide if it was a good or bad thing that Horace was out here. What if she'd changed things? What if he didn't know her? What if she never saw James again?

She jumped back against the wall when a rope slung down and she noticed rather quickly someone coming down. She huddled down, sitting and hugging her knees to her chest. Almost immediately she felt the tears trying to trek their way down her cheeks and she rested her head atop her knees.

"Jesus..." Richard mumbled, kneeling down carefully and checking her over. As soon as he placed his hand on her cheek and she met his eyes, the look of despair and sadness was like a tidal wave.

Neither of them spoke for a moment, Richard trying to understand how she got down here and Juliet trying to figure out an explanation. In this time she'd only met the man a handful of times on really bad occasions.

After a moment Richard took a better look at the blonde. The dirt that covered her face, the blood covering her hands, the scrapes and bruises. The bruises were the worst, but not as bad the trickle of blood from her mouth. In an instant he could see what happened, the chains were still wrapped around her waist, her legs. He felt sickened and horrified at the thought. "Let's get you out of here..." he stated quietly, carefully removing the chains from around her.

He noticed then she'd yet to budge even a little. "Can you move?" he asked her with uncertainty. Why hadn't he thought of it earlier? She had to be injured.

Instead Juliet nodded her head in response. "I'm.. okay," she stated, taking the hand he now offered her and getting to her feet. She noticed he seemed more than a little bit surprised by it. "Don't ask me… because I don't have an answer, Richard.."

Richard bit his lip and simply nodded. He clipped the jumper to his belt and held onto Juliet before giving the rope a tug. "It would seem to me that you're the only one of your little group left."

Juliet remained silent in response to that statement even as they were pulled out of the hole. It took until Richard and she were back on the ground at the top for her to dare asking the question. "What happened to everyone else..?"

Richard studied her carefully before answering. "They disappeared in a flash of light," he answered honestly.

So everyone but her went back? But had they all started over without her or had they only gone back to their own time, with nothing changed but the year? Suddenly she felt fairly nauseous. She wasn't sure if it was because she'd lost everything now, or if she'd just been feeling adrenaline and she really was more injured then she'd realized. She decided it was likely a mixture. Realization that the man she loved was gone to another place. Realization she'd never see her sister or nephew. Realization that this island would likely be the last thing she saw before she died.

Was anything worth it? Worth the pain, the regret, the horror?

Yes.. it was. Sawyer had been worth it. He'd been worth it all, and in the end it had been her who'd screwed their relationship up, not him. She had tried her damnedest to blame him and yet it was her own insecurities that had brought the demise of their love. He had indeed loved her, she believed that fully now. She had seen it in his eyes as she was hanging from his hand. If he had been the last thing she'd ever seen before she died she could have been happy.

How was she supposed to go on in the past without him around to keep her sane? He was the reason she stayed, and she was the reason he was gone.

"I suppose you can't go back to the Dharma Initiative," Richard stated, studying the blank look on her face. That poker face was pretty wonderful; he had to give the woman props. He'd hardly seen anything like that. "You're free to stay with us, or you can go fend for yourself if you'd prefer."

"Juliet?"

Juliet froze at the voice and turned, staring at Horace.

Horace was in shock at the sight. The blonde he'd known for three years was a complete disaster. Blonde hair caked with mud and blood, cheeks scraped and bruised, the rips her in shirt that showed the chain link bruising on her stomach. Those bruises horrified him the most. Sure, he'd seen the blonde a bit greasy from the motor pool but never this.

"No one's going to hurt you, Juliet," he assured her. "Come back to town with me, you need a doctor."

Juliet shook her head. "He's gone, Horace.."

Horace's frown deepened. Jim, she was talking about Jim. "Gone where?" he questioned. "I'm sure we can find him, just relax.."

Juliet's head shook from side to side, tears finally staining a trail through the dirt on her face.

"Going with Richard isn't the answer," Horace stated, daring to take a step forward. "They've nearly killed you before, it's unwise, Juliet.."

Juliet watched as Richard disappeared into the jungle. He'd left his offer on the table and it was up to her now. She could go with Horace, go with Richard, or just go it alone. "I don't need your help.." she told him, trying to pull the emotion from her voice and failing. "I don't need you, I don't need Richard, James.. nobody," she sputtered out.

Horace was shocked and he couldn't recover fast enough to stop her from running off by herself into the jungle. He tried yelling for her, following, but she'd disappeared.

Juliet trekked her way through the jungle regardless of the pain that was beginning to enter her mindset. As though her mind just caught back up to the injuries to her body. She was close at least; she knew she had to be. But if everyone else was gone, what were the chances they remained? She stopped finally, dropping down to her hands and knees with the feeling that she needed to wretch, yet never doing so.

She took deep breaths before she felt the wetness lap across her face and she turned to stare into the snout of a dog. "Vincent.." she whispered, reaching out and scratching him behind the ears shakily.

"Bernard!!!"

Rose ran quickly to Juliet, kneeling down beside the younger woman. "Sweetie, are you okay?" she asked her, worry etching into her voice.

Juliet couldn't find her voice. She stared up at Rose and felt her vision blurring. The last thing she dared to imagine before she saw darkness was Sawyer's face, the sunflower. "James.." she whispered without realization.

*~*~*~*

When blue eyes opened Juliet smelled tea. She finally dared to turn her head and she saw Rose and Bernard at a makeshift table.

"Ah.. About time you woke up," Rose said softly, padding over to the blonde and sitting down beside her. "You had quite the fever these past few nights since we found you."

Juliet was silent at first. She whispered the first thing she could think of. "James..?"

Rose felt a twinge of guilt. "We haven't seen or found anyone except for you dear.." she told her. For another two weeks that was the first and only thing she'd heard Juliet say since waking up. Occasionally Juliet would wander off but Rose always found her sitting out by the water staring out at nothing.

On the third week Rose took a seat beside her. "This is unhealthy, Juliet."

"Do you think he's happy?"

Rose was shocked into silence for a moment. "Sawyer?"

Juliet nodded.

"That depends," she answered honestly. "If you really did reset them, then I guess he's as happy as he could be in that thing he called a life," she stated. "If they just went back to our time.. and he remembers," she sighed. "I would have to say he's probably as devastated as you are."

"I hope he forgot.." Juliet mumbled.

Rose shook her head. "Don't say that."

"He'll blame himself," Juliet pointed out. "He'll sit around blaming himself when it was me who gave up.."

Rose placed her hand on top of Juliet's. "Is that why you sit around blaming yourself?" she dared to ask. "You believe that this is all your fault?"

"I believe that if I hadn't been so insecure.. we never would have been fighting, he wouldn't have gone back thinking that I hate him.." she whispered.

"He wouldn't think that," Rose assured her. "He knows you love him."

Juliet was quiet now. "I hope he forgot.." she repeated once more.

Rose gave her hand a squeeze before standing and walking away.

()()END()()

Well. That was basically the request.. I think. It was just Juliet's thoughts Post-Season 5. I assumed if Sara wanted a reunion at the end she would have said so :P but if she asked.. maybe I'd give her a New Years present and make a reunion part to add onto this.

I'll be back to my stories soon. Finals end on Weds for college.