"You're so damn lazy! You never do anything and yet you get everything!" A single tear fell. It stained the pale cheek currently tinted pink from having ran from his home to the middle of the woods. Big green eyes stare out at the water before them, irises already fogged from the previous overflow, already spilled and dried just like the many that had come before it.
"I don't mean to be..." He mumbled curling his legs closer to his chest arms wrapping around them as if they would protect his heart from being torn at further. Too bad no outside influence could save him from his own mind.
"You don't belong here, why don't you go home to your real family, your actual father." Another tear, starting yet another downpour that left him shaking and sniffling. His voice rose in emotion, but no one heard him.
"He wouldn't accept me...I don't belong there either..." He buried his head into his knees; another attempt to try and salvage the rest of his heart that wasn't already jaded.
"You're so fucking selfish! You take everything, even what isn't really yours and claim it as if it is!" This time, he had nothing to say. He did do that...he was selfish... He didn't really try to be selfish though, he just didn't want to be alone. He took over everything and anyone he could because maybe then they'd stay with him...but they never did. Everyone fought him. Was he really so bad that no one could stand him?
There was France...but that bastard was a liar. He said he'd be there, but when was he really ever? He showed up when he wanted, but he was never there to actually help him. In the times he needed him most, the damned blonde disappeared.
Probably avoiding you so he doesn't have to deal with your petty shit. This time it wasn't his mind regurgitating past words, it was just his own thoughts turning against him. He couldn't find the strength or will to fight back against it.
There was a hot sun burning down on his cheeks drying the tears even as they fell. He wasn't sobbing any longer, most of it had calmed down, receding just beneath the surface where it would just begin to flow over again later.
"It's never good to be a boiling pot you know. You should try crying when you need to, not just holding it in. You're only ruining yourself." The voice of his mother rang out, covering but not eliminating the previous ones of his brothers. He knew it wasn't good to hold it all in, but if he tried to talk about it...well then he was just attention seeking. None of his problems mattered, what did he, a child, really know about pain? Nothing.
A bird chirped around him and he sunk further in on himself wishing it would just shut up. His green eyes turned up toward the sky, dark circles formed beneath them making him look tired and the sorrow inside of them was one that should never be seen inside a child.
It's so beautiful outside today...the sky is clear, and it's warm... I wish it would storm. I wish there would be a horrible thunderstorm. Maybe I'd get lost out here and they'd finally get worried and come after me...for once. Or maybe I'd get hit by lightning and get killed...would they care then? Or, if nothing else, maybe then they'd see how bad I felt. He frowned turning his eyes back down towards the ground before closing them completely.
"I don't care how you feel! No one cares; you could die, and guess what? No one would fucking care!" He flinched at the returning voice of his brother clenching his hands together as he felt anger spike. The rush of tears started up all over again and he whimpered pathetically before it turned into full out sobs. Maybe it's best it doesn't storm then... I'd just be called selfish again.
His small form curled up into a ball rocking back and forth ignoring the pain in his tailbone from the hard ground below him. He just had to ignore it; if he ignored it then it would all just go away. Only, it never did, it all just hurt too much to be ignored. Real life...it just hurt too much.
He let himself relax some, his mind wandering and he let himself pretend that for that moment someone was there with him. He didn't care if they really existed or not, they existed as much as they needed to in order to just be there. Arms wrapped around him, wings fluttering in his ear, and the soft brush of fur against his side let him know that right then someone was there to care for him. That was all he needed...just someone to be there.