A/N: My first fic ever! The bunny has been following me around for a month, so I finally decided to get rid of it. No flames please! R&R
Is He Really That Ignorant, Or Is It Something Else?
Castiel has been paired up with Uriel for a rather short time (only a thousand human years or so) and most of it was in Heaven. Thus, although he knew that Uriel disliked humans, he had not heard his brothers favorite nickname for them before coming to Earth.
Castiel actually is the angelic equivalent of a traveler. In his many years of life he had seen most, if not all, creatures his Father had created in this vast universe. None of them as beautiful and complex as humans, but not all soulless.
Uriel, on the other hand, has been assigned to Earth from the beginning and, as far as Castiel knows, his knowledge of other planets is very small.
The first time Uriel called humans 'mud monkeys', Castiel was a bit confused. He spent some time among mud monkeys (who looked nothing like Earth monkeys, but did like to bathe in mud, drink mud, and sleep in mud – their home planet was, in fact, covered in mud). They might not have been very smart, but were friendly and peaceful. They also had a great sense of humor.
The point was, however, that they didn't resemble humans at all.
Always wishing to help others, Castiel decided to explain the differences to Uriel the next time he said the words. After all, it would embarrass Uriel greatly if one of his other brothers found out about his lack of knowledge.
Luckily (or not, in Uriel's opinion), the next time Uriel called humans 'mud monkeys' in Castiels presence was when they were visiting the Winchester brothers before Samhain.
Not one to break his word, even to himself, Cas made use of his angelic powers to slow the passage of time outside of the motel room they were occupying to a crawl and started speaking:
"I have noticed that you use the words 'mud monkey' a lot lately, Uriel. I figured it is because you have never really seen a real mud monkey before. Otherwise you would know that their looks and behavior differ greatly from humans. I took the liberty of creating some pictures and diagrams that would help me explain it to you..."
Castiel reached inside his trench coat and took out several large sheets of paper ('Figures an Angel would have multidimensional pockets.' thought Sam, while Dean just gaped), which he then stuck to the wall (with his awesome angel powers). Meanwhile Uriel finally managed to close his jaw and started protesting.
"Castiel, I don't need a lecture..."
"Of course you do! Why else would you compare our charges to big, green and furry lizards? Even their characters don't match! Mud monkeys are the most polite and peaceful creatures I have ever had the privilege to meet. Even if they liked to throw mudballs at me in the most bizarre of moments... But that was only because they like to play a lot. Sometimes I wish Dean would be as polite as they were..." ("Hey, what's that supposed to mean?!" "Shut up, Dean. It's interesting.")
"But..." began Uriel, wearing a puppy-dog expression which had both Winchesters grinning like mad. "Do we even have time for this? Samhain is going to rise in a few hours!"
"We have quite enough time, brother. I've just made some for our use. Now let me begin..."
After a solid hour of lecturing (though it was indeed rather interesting), Uriel vowed to never speak of humans in front of Castiel (and to find a better nickname for them), Cas was happy to educate his friend (and show off in front of Dean), Sam was ecstatic to know that aliens do exist and Dean decided he liked his angel after all.
All in all, everything was well and dandy in the land of Supernatural.