This is the first of several Twilight/Animal Crossing crossover stories.

All you need to know before hand is the backstory of OC's Beavis, Socko, and Yugi (the Three Cats).

They started out as pranksters (due to Beavis' jealousy of Edward) by shitting on the floor- letting The Cullens blame poor Jacob, whose manly shower gel was replaced by Summer's Eve body wash, and finally swapping Edward's hair styling aids with silver glitter paint!

The three cats don't have to worry about hunting time though… their scents are somehow undetectable to vampires.

This first story picks up where Carlisle encounters The Goof (another OC), a local personality.

This can be thought of as a prequel to "The Cannibal Children" since Chowtown is known as Big Paw and Chow is not yet Mayor, though there is really no connection between the two worlds except for the grumpy but lovable pink panda.

Finally, in my writings, despite Aro having a mate, he is madly in love with Jacob. That is all I'll say here.

Twilight Crossing #1

Chapter 1

Carlisle was pissed again. It was another bad night at the hospital. When would those fuckers bring in an OB/GYN already? One good thing- Carlisle didn't have to play catcher of any of those disgusting humans. The hospital janitor did just fine.

But Carlisle did have to deal with this one dumbass news reporter whose wife was about to pop. He was going on about how zombie hookers were going to get him. Carlisle wanted to smack him. He knew some zombies that were definitely not hookers. However, the janitor was known to do anything with anyone in the supply closet for a price.

Carlisle didn't have to smack the Goof, because when the kid started coming out of his wife's vag, he fainted right there in Carlisle's lap.

That was why Carlisle was pissed.

A week later, Carlisle was watching the news and the goofy reporter was back on after family leave. Carlisle wanted to smack him even through the TV until The Goof said this:

"The older Justin Bieber gets, the more he looks like Marcy D'Arcy from Married… With Children"

Carlisle was pissed off no more. "Fucking sweet", he said. "and I'm Al Bundy, except for being quicker than Yugi."

Yugi heard that. "Hey! I just can't get into position!"

So Carlisle ran over to Bieber's crib and pissed in the bushes. Too bad for Bieber, who was smoking a blunt behind the pissy foliage. Carlisle laughed.

"Ha! You gots no titties!", he shouted and laughed.

The front door opened. It was Jefferson D'Arcy wearing a No Ma'am shirt and also laughing his ass off until he saw Bieber giving the evil eye. "You take that back!', he said to Carlisle.

But Carlisle already went home.

"And I have breasts, damn it!", Bieber exclaimed.

"It's because nobody can see them, dear." ,said Jefferson.

Bieber looked at Jefferson. "Where were you last night?"

Jefferson smiled. "Cheating on you with the hospital janitor! And it only cost you $100!"

Meanwhile, back in Forks…

"This is Twilight, not Married… With Children! If I let this go on any longer, then Kathy Griffin will be blowing Anderson Cooper for real!" , Carlisle shouted for no apparent reason except for breaking the 4th wall. "Oh, fuck! I haven't said fuck for 10 minutes! FUCK FUCK FUCKITY FUCK!"

Yugi appeared. "That's all folks, for now anyway. Chow is coming to Forks!"