A/N: Boredom, procrastination and being generally tired are a potent combination. This fic is the birth-child of that. Don't ask where this came from, I don't know myself. This takes place around Chuck Versus the Fat Lady. Title is wholly random.

Disclaimer: I do own Chuck. Yep, I bought the syndication rights. (no not really :( )

Sarah versus the Unexpected Expectations

It took a whole lot longer than expected—picking locks when inebriated wasn't the easiest thing in the world to accomplish after all—but finally, the tumblers clicked into place and the door swung open. She stepped through and walked while trying to make as little noise as she could. Which considering the heels she was wearing, was a lot harder than it seemed. Added to the mix was a healthy dose of alcohol, so what was considered a hard mission became Mission: Impossible. She snickered as she remembered the ridiculous movie that Chuck had made her watch. Fine, the scene in the terminal room was pretty fantastic, although completely unrealistic. But still, Sarah had a mission to complete. She click-clacked her way through the little apartment on instinct, having committed the route to the asset's bedroom to her memory ages ago. Today—or tonight rather—was different though. Today, this whole ordeal wasn't cover maintenance. After all, the little twerp had decided that since Jill Freakin' Roberts suddenly reappeared on the scene, he could dump Sarah Walker, super spy extraordinaire (and the poster child for emotionally crippled people) and hook up with that brunette slut.

Hell no!

She had given subtle hints all along, from touches that went on much longer than a normal friendly touch would have, up to pressing his face in her bosom during a tandem shower. Granted, they were both clothed in underwear and they were sprayed with what they thought was a deadly toxin, which turned out to be a powdered fruit drink—although Sarah had a glass of that stuff when she was little, and the term deadly toxin wasn't completely wrong—but damn it, he still didn't make a move. There was only one thing to do. Sneak up on him, pin him to bed and ravish him, multiple times preferably. Okay, maybe not that desperate, but it was time to go on the offense, rather than taking a back seat and hoping that the geek… nerd, would pick up on the hints.

She reached the door and slid off her boots before opening the door and tip-toeing her way in. Her shoulder connected with the door and she stifled a giggle. The world was so pleasantly spinning after all and… wait, hang on. She had to keep her eyes on the prize. Chuck was what was important now. And the subsequent activities of course.

Sarah was well aware of being a horny drunk but she couldn't be bothered reigning herself in. It was time to get some of that famous—or at least she figured it would've been famous if he would've distributed it throughout the world but if he wanted to keep his male parts he had best kept it to himself, especially considering the fact that Sarah wanted sole access to it from now on—loving.

She contemplated pulling her top off, but she figured that was something that Chuck could do, akin to unwrapping a Christmas present, even though that was still a few months away. She stifled yet another giggle and slid into the bed, spooning up to him.

"Hi Chuck," she breathed in his ear and the shudder that went through him pleased her to no end. "I think it's time that we got some private time. You know, like a real couple." She stressed the real, her tongue appreciating the feel of the r as it rolled through her mouth. She liked letters. They were fun to say. She started raking her fingers over his chest, finding it to be surprisingly large, especially considering the frame of the lanky nerd. But who knew, maybe he started working out in his spare time. She mentally shrugged and continuing to rake her fingernails over his chest, before whispering in his ear, "So what do you say we get started and…"

"Don't you dare finish that sentence, Walker," a grunt—decidedly not Chuck's—tore through the bedroom and Sarah stiffened.

Oh God…

She tried to gracefully slide out of bed but her leg caught on the edge and she fell face first to the floor. "Ow," she moaned while cradling her head. The floor was a lot harder than it looked. Her mind broke through the pleasant haze and she peered up at Casey who sat up in his bed while looking at her with narrowed eyes. "Hi," she lamely said.

"Walker… I don't know what you're trying to do… hell, scrap that, I know exactly what you're going to do. Just leave me out of it."

She stood up and scrambled towards the door, her face reminiscent of a tomato. "Sure… sorry to disturb you… it was a practical joke. Ha-ha," she tried, but Casey didn't buy it. Finally he sighed.

"Turn off the surveillance on the geek's bedroom when you leave. I don't want to have to see this thing you've got planned when I'm having my breakfast tomorrow."

Sarah's eyes went wide. "You… you're not going to… what?"

"You heard me Walker… now scram."

She opened the door and all but ran out, picking up her heels on the way. Still, before she was completely out of the room, Casey gave her one more request.

"Please try and keep the noise level down, will you?"