Author's Notes
Once again, this may be rated T for a reason!
This is a really weird one, but I love it! Please don't get confused by all the font changes. It's explained at the end.
Crazy Dreams
"Time for a nap!" Forde says to himself, adjusting the covers on his bed. "I love having the day off! I can eat, sleep, and be merry! What else is there in life?"
Smiling to himself, he closes his eyes as he waits for sleep...
"Good morning, world!" Forde exclaims to himself, eagerly jumping out of his covers. "I love having the day off! I can eat, sleep, and be merry! What else is there in life?"
After Forde changes from his sleeping garments into his relaxing clothes, he exits his room, and as he makes his way to the dining hall, he somehow finds the answer to his rhetorical question... not an easy feat, considering the question IS rhetorical, after all.
"Forde!"
Looking behind him, Forde is greeted by his secret crush, Princess Eirika. Ever since he's painted her portrait, he just can't stop admiring the princess' beauty, as well as her compassionately kind personality. And yet, he knows that he can't say anything about it; he's only a knight in her service. A knight that can paint REALLY good portraits, but a knight nonetheless.
"Forde, have you seen my brother?" Eirika asks, warmly embracing Forde. "I need to speak with him. But if you don't know where he is, would you like to sit and chat with me in the dining hall for a while and see if he turns up?"
A decision lies before Forde: he knows that Ephraim is still sleeping in bed. And the right thing to do would be to...
"I have no idea where Ephraim is!" Forde says quickly, clearly choosing the obvious answer. "But maybe he'll come by for breakfast soon! I can escort you to the dining hall, if you like, Princess," he finishes, professionally bowing and offering his arm, but to his surprise and joy, Eirika simply giggles, kisses his cheek, and takes his hand in hers.
"You know, I told you to call me Eirika, not Princess. You're just like Seth!" she chuckles, and the two of them begin to walk hand in hand to the dining hall.
If anyone could see what Forde is thinking right now, they would see him frolicking in a field of daisies with Eirika in one arm, a pillow in the other, and a cooked turkey leg in his mouth, just like life is supposed to be.
"Forde, you look so happy," Eirika discerns, and before Forde can answer, Myrrh runs by the two of them, glee written all over her face. The two confused companions watch as she eagerly raps the door to Ephraim's room before letting herself in.
"I guess Ephraim must be in there, waiting for one of his wife's 'sessions'," Eirika comments, her face turning squeamish as Forde's become confused. "They try 15 times a day to procreate an heir, because Myrrh said that it's near impossible to find the correct timing for a baby to be born. It's sad, really..."
"Actually, it's absurd," a voice replies, and Lute emerges from the library holding a book called 'The Life Cycle of Manaketes'. It seems Lute thought it would be an interesting read; or at least that's the hope. "This book says that the Manakete can't reproduce by conventional means when a human is involved. It takes a completely different, yet simple, procedure..."
"Wait, wait," Forde interrupts, "I never knew about any of this stuff Ephraim was doing! Besides, does Myrrh know about this?"
"Almost guaranteed," Lute confirms.
"Does... Ephraim?"
"Definitely not."
"So... Myrrh is basically..."
"You are indeed correct."
The foul thought immediately triggers a response in Forde's empty stomach, and pretty soon he's throwing up all over his darling Eirika's morning dress, staining it green and brown for all eternity. Eirika, understandably upset, knees Forde in his 'sacred stones' before storming off in anger while Lute starts rambling on about some other fascinating things Manaketes do that Forde couldn't care less about.
"What is going on?!" Forde cries in bewilderment, before his world fades into black.
"WAAAAAAA!" Forde screams, sitting up in his bed with sweat running over his face. "What a horrible dream! Thank goodness it's over..."
After calming down somewhat, he turns to the side and nearly shrieks when he sees Myrrh coldly staring him down with her arms crossed in front of her.
"Forde," she says, "Ephraim and I need your bed. Ours broke."
"WAAAAAAA!" Forde shouts, sitting up in his bed with sweat running over his face. "What a horrible dream! Thank goodness it's... wait, is it over?"
He examines his room around him, and everything looks the way it's supposed to be. It's the middle of the night, no strange things seem to be happening, and his wife, Eirika, is peacefully stirring beside him. Rubbing the sleep out of her eyes, Eirika puts on a sleepy smile for her husband before snuggling closer to him.
"Forde, what happened? I thought I heard you say something," she says, kissing his cheek. "You okay?"
"Yes, I'm fine... I just had the weirdest dream last night..."
"That's the last time you eat turkey legs before bed, then."
THE END
Author's Notes
I dedicate this bizarre piece to Tom-ato13, who's been wishing for a FordexEirika story since I starting writing Comfort! I've been wanting to write this for months now, but I never really got the chance. By far, this is the strangest thing I've ever written, and because of that, I'll write another FordexEirika fic for Tomato in the future.
In case no one understood, here's what's going on: The normal font is real life. The italics are for Forde's dream. The bold italics are for the dream within Forde's dream. (Inception? :p) And so, since the vast majority of the story is not reality, the characters were purposely written OOC. However, since this is (again) not reality, OOC is not bad in that context! Yay!
Even though some lines were repeated, I typed out every word; no copying and pasting at all. Shows my dedication. :D Although, certain bits of those sentences were changed anyway.
Either way, I really hope you guys liked this, (no guest reviews please...) and I hope Tomato is a good sport about it, too! (He HATES EphraimxMyrrh like the plague, which saddens and amuses me :p) Now, I'll fulfill my promise and write that next chapter of AGOH early! It will be up in a couple of weeks, hopefully. I promise something normal, plus a bit of fluff too! Stay tuned! Thanks again, guys!
Oh yeah, if I could have the girl of my dreams in one arm, a pillow in the other, and a turkey leg in my mouth while frolicking in a field of daisies, my life would be complete too. :D