Hime:Sorry if this is random and you want me to get my butt working on the next chapter of Pretty Girl; I am, I've written up half of it already so don't worry. I've just had a rough night and am kinda depressed, so I'm venting with this oneshot. (frowns and slinks away again) Lyrics are Rascal Flatts' "What Hurts The Most." Skipped like one chorus,'cause I didn't want this all lyrics and no story, so yeah.

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"I can take the rain on the roof of this empty house
That don't bother me
I can take a few tears now and then and just let them out
I'm not afraid to cry every once in a while
Even though going on with you gone still upsets me
There are days every now and again I pretend I'm ok
But that's not what gets me."

Sometimes, like tonight, Orihime still looked up at the moon and thought about him.

The crescent moon reminded her of him a lot, of Grimmjow. She wasn't sure why. She didn't even know why she still thought about him. Here, she had been rescued from Hueco Mundo just as she'd wished since the moment she was captured. Her friends had gotten hurt but…at least she was home, with people she loved who would take care of her. Now and then though, a pair of blue eyes would haunt her vision, and the tears would overflow whether she wanted them to or not.

He'd been kind. He'd kept the other Espada from taking advantage of her, and even though he was brash and mean at times, she knew he held himself back for her sake. Orihime's heart broke every time she followed this familiar train of thought. She'd gone so far as to say that she loved him, and the night she accepted that fact, just before the final battle, before she was rescued, she cried. She hadn't wept for Ichigo, or Rukia, or Tatsuki, or anyone else either fighting or missing her. She cried because she knew, just knew in her heart that she would never see him again.

"What hurts the most
Was being so close
And having so much to say
And watching you walk away
And never knowing
What could have been
And not seeing that loving you
Is what I was tryin' to do."

Didn't she love Ichigo? That question pulled at her heartstrings. Of course she did, Ichigo was her first love, and that would never change…

Orihime rolled over in bed, sniffling and biting back the tears as she gazed at her orange-haired love beside her, fast asleep. She'd been so happy when he'd taken her in his arms afterwards and told her everything; all of his guilt and worry and absolute love. He honestly thought she'd hate him, simply because he was too weak to have kept her safe at home. He was her knight; the memory brought a small smile to her lips.

And either way, if she hadn't gone, she'd have never met the wonder that was Grimmjow. A supposed beast of a man who only knew battle…what a lie that was. He'd proved that by protecting and giving her comfort in a hellish place, and gods if she didn't fall in love with him for it.

She got out of bed silently so as not to wake Ichigo, and crept down the hall to the front door of her apartment. It was now the middle of spring and pretty warm, so her peach colored nightgown felt wonderfully cool in the night air. Hime wiped the already forming tear tracks on her cheeks away, standing in the moonlight. All she could feel was the grass tickling her toes and the light breeze on her cheeks, making them feel cold when it hit their wetness. It was so silly, but she just wanted to stand there in that light, and think about him and cry. About his rough voice, his blue hair, even that crazy grin that really always made her giggle when she saw it. How he'd sit with her in her cell and listen to her go on about her friends and things she liked to do for fun; how he'd gone so far as to hold her on one memorable night when the pain of everything just got too much. Maybe if she'd told him that night about how much it meant to her, she wouldn't be without him now.

Orihime sat down, curling her knees to her chest, staring at the moon and weeping silently. When the sun came up, Ichigo would come out and find her there, and she'd smile and give him all the love she had for him, but for now…

Orihime smiled tearfully, giving a laugh that sounded more like a sob. "Gosh, you'd think I'm being so foolish right now, if you could see me. I'm sorry, I'm trying not to cry…" She could already see his face as he rolled his eyes at her, calling her weak and emotional, but it only made her miss him more. So she took a few deep breaths and rested her chin on her crossed arms, closing her eyes and listening to the wind. If she tried hard enough, she could hear his laughter on it.

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Hime:I don't feel much better. (sniffs)