Thanks to everyone who has helped tremendously with this fic like camRox and 7.06andcounting! Seriously couldn't have done this without you
I look at her. Her with the frail body and strung out hair. Her with the tight pants and full bangs. Her with the monitors hooked up to what looks like every orifice. They beep steadily and I sit close to where she lays.
Soda is in the corner of the room, arms crossed. Darry is near the door, guilt carved into his face. Darry sent her here to get fixed. It's the worst decision he made since hitting me.
I can't believe he would bring her here. To get cut open. To die. Soda is by my side rubbing my shoulders before I noticed I was crying.
"America will be fine Pony kid. Doc says she will wake up soon."I reach out to her without moving my position. She's scared. Not as scared when mom and dad died. That was the scariest moment of our lives.
Everything was easier when they were still around, before Darry had to step up. But the past few years have just been too much to handle without them.
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See that sick girl in the bed? Yeah that me. Jeepers do I look pale. And thin. And gross.
After mom and dad died, we were okay for a while but then it just went all to shit and I guess that's why I'm here. Before mom and dad died everythin was just easier.
Maybe my brothers and I wouldn't have to grow up so fast if they were alive. Maybe Soda wouldn't be riskin all he's got and and maybe Darry wouldn't have to live with the unsurmountable weight of his decisions; If they were alive.
September 1966
"Ow! Ponyboy move over," I said to him pushing him out of the mirrors view. The ribbons in my hair were just not staying. And his splashing toothpaste did not help at all. When I was younger I remember thinkin my brothers were the bestest thing ever cause I always had someone to hang out with. But then we all became teenagers and its not as fun. They get moody and explosive.
Sodapop flung the shower curtain and stepped out into the crowded bathroom dripping proceeded to shake his hair like a dog. I slapped him in the chest and said,
"Move over, asshole!" He just laughed but Darry didnt find it so funny,
"America I oughtta wash your mouth out with soap for talkin like that." His voice was far away and gruff. But he meant it. Soda's best buddy Steve stomped through the never locked front door while Darry was in the middle of cussin me out,
"No lady should be speaking like that." It was embarassing when he hollered at me when people were over, especially with that smug look on Steve's face. And when did he expect me to be a lady? My ears felt hot and I sensed Ponyboy's gaze. Tearin the ribbons out of my hair I exclaimed,
"You all talk that way, you ain't no better than me!"
"Aren't any better," he corrected," Now hurry up or y'all be late for school."
"Yeah, little lady," Steve taunted, flicking my nose. I ran into the kitchen grabbing an apple for breakfast. Ponyboy was still in the bathroom, searching for a hint of beard.
"Think you're growing seedlings, kiddo?" I heard Steve mock. Ponyboy bristled with anger. He hates Steve. I brushed past Darry without looking him in the eye and grabbed Ponyboys arm,
"Come on, we gotta jam if we dont want to be late."
Ponyboy sat next to me in the backseat of Steve's self proclaimed 'souped up ride' waiting for Sodapop to find his shoes. The door bust open and Soda came flying out with Steve and Superman on his heels. And just as I thought I was in the clear from his wrath, Darry came up right next to the car and said,
"Come home right after school and pick up a bit. I don't want social services to come by and see this mess."
"Darry come on! Why me?" I whined. I swear he wasn't always like this.
"Cause Soda and me are working and Ponyboy has track. So quit complaining." Steve jammed the key into the ignition and peeled out of our dirt driveway. The radio was blasting while him and Soda shouted over it talkin bout some girl using words I shouldnt know. Ponyboy turned to look at me and I tried to hide my pouting.
I was so mad at Darry, but I didnt want to pout. Teenagers don't pout and Ponyboy and I just turned fourteen less than a month ago. Soda and Pony get all the breaks Darry always lets them go out, even if its a school night. They get to see their friends and run around town doing Lord knows what. But I have to stay home. But I guess it ain't like I got any friends anyway. I never made a lot of other friends when I was young cause I thought my brothers were all I needed. Now they just get in the way, making a mess, hollerin at all hours of the night, and using all the hot water. Two-Bit's sister was pretty tuff but I never got to see her much.
Now all the guys get weird when I'm there, like conversation is discouraged. Like when people are talkin about something they don't want you to know and they get that's real low whisper? Makes you feel like a real skuzz.
"Youre just bitter," Ponyboy says to me in a low voice as Steve's car screams around another corner.
"You say somethin, America?" Soda twisted around in his seat looking at me.
"No," I responded.
After school I played Cinderella. I ignored Angela Shepard's calls as I walked home. She wanted to hang out but I'm pretty sure she just wanted to see Ponyboy.
Soda came home first and promptly made a mess of the semi clean living room.
"Atleast pick your shoes up," I begged him. He grinned at me devilishly, picking them up and holding them at arms length. Looking me in the eye he dropped them again and began laughing. I tackled him, or atleast tried to. But he was too big and heavy.
"Soda, lets go play catch," I told him. He hesitated,
"I dunno, America. I don't want you getting all roughed up."
"I ain't never got roughed up I'll be fine," I protested.
"Come on, lets go the store and we can get stuff for dinner," he suggested. Damn he was good at distracting me.
While we were walking into town we found Ponyboy leaning against a store front with Curly Shepard.
"What goin on man," Soda walked up, flipping his collar.
"Nothing much," Curly said stomping out a cigarette, "what's shakin, America?" I looked up from my feet, stunned he was talking to me. I wish I could tell you that I had the perfect comeback, but the words were stuck to the roof of my mouth like peanut butter.
"Same ol," I stuttered as he stared at me with wolffish eyes. No one else seemed to notice.
"We were headin down the the grocer, russle up some sort of dinner," Soda explained.
"We'll hoof it with you," Ponyboy said. Soda talked with Ponyboy about school and how track practice went that day. He answered with some showy responses. Trying to look tough in front of Curly, I bet.
The walk wasn't long at all, but we stopped to talk to a lot of people, like Dallas who was hanging out with some guys from the Brumly outfit. I think they started talking about a rumble that was happening at the end of the week,
"You gonna be there, Shepard?" Dally asked flicking his cigarette. Curly put on his trademark scowl and said,
"I ain't no coward."
It wasn't until Sylvia showed up and hung all over Dallas that I really just wanted to go the market. She sashayed her way up to him, swinging her hips like girls do when they want something.
"Get off me, Syl," he demanded her with a glare. She kissed him on the check instead and sat on the hood of the car next to him. She was tryin real hard to get his attention, twirling her hair, showing the gap between her dress and chest. But Dally just went on with his normal conversation with his buddies, something about a hot rod I think. Eventually she started huffing and threatened to storm off.
"Then just go, babe," he said exasperatedly, "I'm trying to finish business right now."
Then Sylvia fired some choice words at Dally, all of which seemed to bounce right off his bullet proof exterior as he kept a cool tuff expression on his face. She stormed off and Dally smirked at his own superiority.
Darry was home just in time for dinner. I made some sort of chicken. Well it was actually the same sort of chicken we've been having for a while cause it was the only recipe out of mom's cook book I could follow. Ponyboy talked with his mouthful and Soda imitated him, spraying mashed potatoes across the table. Darry and I were in tears we laughed so hard.
Then we sat in front of the tv watchin Gun smoke. I wished I could run away to a new land and make my own rules, just like Marshall and Kitty did. I'd be free to do what I want and all the fun bustin adventures would come with it. Maybe I'd toss a few back in the saloon. Or I'd hog tie some redskins just for kicks.
Darry wasn't even watchin it cause his face was down while Soda was trying to rub a muscle in his back.
"America, will you walk on my back?" Darry looked up. This was the first time in a while I felt he actually asked me something. It was one of the last times, too.
"Thanks, sis," he mumbled sleepily.
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