Disclaimer: Hey, no.
Fallen daydreams because: Daydreaming is fun.
Extra notes: Underlines in bold are Lucy's thoughts. Italics are her memories. Regular print is the present. Underlined italics are past thoughts.
Warning: This story is sad. I cried while writing it. If you want the full effect then listen to Say Something by A Great Big World and Cristina Aguilera. That's where the idea for this story came from.
The worst kind of pain is when you're smiling just to stop the tears from falling. ~ Lucy Heartfilia
XxxX
I thought I was happy back then. Back when he first found me. Back when he invited me to join the guild. I thought that was the happiest moment of my life. I never thought that there were more moments coming that were better. But when they did come, I felt like the happiest person alive. Then one day…it all disappeared.
I guess Heartfilia's truly, weren't meant to be happy.
It all ended in complete and utter failure. It all ended in chaos. With darkness, with hate, with everything unlucky. It was the day Fairy Tail fell into the dark.
Of course, it just happens that I was the only one to survive. Lucky me. But I lost everything, my family, my friends, even my lover. Like I said, I wasn't meant to be happy.
XxxX
"Natsu! Natsu, where are you!" I screamed out into the smoke filled clearing.
"I'm right here, Lucy!" His voice called to me.
"Where! I can't see you!" I searched around, frantically looking for my pink headed lover.
"Try going straight!" He called back.
And that's what I did. I went straight. When I stopped running I was face-to-face with Natsu.
"Natsu…" I breathed out, taking in his bruised and bloody form.
"Lucy…" He said, probably doing the same.
I started walking towards him, my feet shuffling heavily against the dirt ground. That was when I saw the man. The man that was steadily creeping up behind him.
I stopped all of a sudden and opened my mouth,"Natsu, watch out!" But it was too late. The man had already come up behind Natsu and thrust the broken blade of a sword into his back, right where his heart was.
"NATSU!" I yelled as both the man and Natsu fell to the ground. I ran to him. Natural instinct, you could call it. By the time I got to him the man was already dead and Natsu was slowly slipping away. Away from me. Away from the guild. Away from life.
I took his already bloody body into my arms and cried. I cried for him. I cried for us. I cried for everyone. I asked myself: How were any of us going to make it out alive? How were we going to live on even if we did? It's just too much…
I let out a strangled sob. "Natsu, please, please don't leave me."
He reached out a shaking hand and touched my cheek. "L-Lucy? Is that you? Lucy, w-what's going on? W-why can't I see you? Why does it hurt so much? Are you c-crying? Lucy?"
Another sob escaped my lips." Y-yes, it's me, Natsu. You have to stay with me, okay? I'm sorry, I'm so, so sorry." I sobbed some more." I couldn't save you in time. I'm so sorry, Natsu."
My words seemed to bring realization to him. "Luce…Am I dying?" He asked in a weak voice.
My sobs got stronger even as I tried to suppress them." N-no, you're not. I won't let you."
His eyes grew wide as he felt a searing pain in his chest. "Lucy, I know now that I don't have much t-time and I know that I didn't say it that often, but I love you, L-Luce. I know that I may not be that skilled in affection and love, but I mean it. I love you."
"No, don't talk like that! Don't talk like you're about to die! I know you'll make it, I know you will!" My cries grew louder by the minute for Natsu. For my lover. My whole world.
"Luce, I can't make it." He said, his eyes sad and dimming each second that passed.
"What do you mean, Natsu! You are going to make it! Please! Don't leave me alone! Don't leave me like everyone else!" I cried out, the tears spilling from my eyes in endless waterfalls.
"Please stop crying, L-Luce. It'll b-be alright. You won't be alone. I, the guild, we'll always be with you. So you won't be alone, I'll be by your side always." He smiled weakly, blood coming out of his mouth.
"N-no! I don't want you to be by my side in spirit! I want you to be by my side in the flesh, right here holding my hand! I wanted to grow old with you! I wanted to live my life with you! You can't leave me here! Not when we've only begun! Please! Stay with me! I love you! I know that we were so dense in the past! I know we didn't realize it until it was too late! But I love you and I can't live without you! So please….stay." I laid my forehead down on his bleeding chest, feeling his heartbeat slow even further. I picked my head up to look into his eyes, my own pleading.
"I'm s-sorry, Luce. I love you." He looked at me with his sad eyes and slowly wiped away my tears, one by one. "Just remember, you will always be the only one that I love, but I have t-to say goodb-bye n-now." He smiled one last smile before he took his last breath and his hand fell from my face to land on the ground, limp.
My eyes widened and more tears cascaded down my horror struck face. "N-Natsu? Natsu! NATSU! No! You can't, you can't! You can't die on me now! Please! Say something! Please…"
I placed my head back on his chest, hearing nothing but the rustle of his clothes under my head and the wind dancing in the trees. I was still crying when I looked up, finally ready to take in the rest of the scene around us. What I saw was horrifying. All my friends, no, my family, they all lay on the ground bloodied and torn to pieces. Dead. My eyes, now dry from crying out every last tear, dropped down to look at Natsu and my hands. My hands, which seemed to move on their own, covered my face.
Nothing would ever be the same.
XxxX
I guess when I look back, nothing ever was the same. The guild members were no longer there to fill the gaping hole in my heart. There was no Fairy Tail anymore. It all died and went into the grave with them. I still think that I could have done more to save them, to be of more help. Things were never the same. The town was never the same. I was never the same. They all left me and I thought I was all alone, but then I remembered Natsu's words: "You'll never be alone. We'll be by your side always."
I guess that was the realization that brought the light back into my world and that drove the darkness away. I began to live like they were still with me. I brought back Fairy Tail and recruited new people. I brought those people joy, just how Natsu and the others gave me joy. But I never stopped loving him and I never will. I know now that they're here beside me, through the bad days and the good. Counting on me and cheering me on. And maybe one day I'll meet them again, but for now this is good. My new Fairy Tail. My new friends. My new additions to the family. Because no matter what, Natsu and the others are still family and so were all the other friends I met along the way.
So yes, this is good until I meet them again.
So, this isn't goodbye and neither was that time, it's just goodbye until next time.