Chapter 1: My Parents are Annoying me out of my Wits

Ok, this is the story of Tonks' early life. Since Voldemort's on the rampage and her parents are part of the Order of the Phoenix, she and all the other kids ages 10 and below whose parents are in the Order are invited to stay at Hogwarts where it's safe. And her mum said yes to the invitation. Follow her, her kitten, her diary, and her pink carpetbag through Hogwarts where she meets Remus Lupin (no romance though), Bill Weasley, and an absurd house-elf who wants to be an accountant.

August 20, 1977, in my room

Wow. This really sucks. No seriously, I CANNOT BELIEVE THIS!!!! HOW COULD THEY DO THIS TO ME!! MY OWN PARENTS!!!!! GRRR……….

Later

Ok, sorry about that. It's just, according to Mum and Dad (a.k.a. Adrom---Wait a second. You're my diary, right? You're supposed to know everything that's happened to me so far in my life, even the stuff that I don't remember, right?...Ok, judging by your blank expression (yes, you can make expressions), I take it you can't. Phooey. This is a major setback in my plans here. I thought I could just pour out all my troubles to you and you'd know what I was saying. Let me guess, you don't even know who Theodore Thomas Tonks is, do you. No, you definitely don't. Ok, FYI, he's my dad. My INSANELY ANNOYING DAD!!!!!! GRRRRR……..

Later later

What is with all these grrs??!!??!! Am I like, losing my mind here? Ok, I'm writing all this pointless waffle. Why don't I actually get to the point here? Oh yeah, because I don't feel like it.

Later later later

Ok, I've been extremely down and angry these past couple of laters, so I'm going to try to be happy and bouncy until I get out of this bad mood! And then I will be happy and bouncy. Yay! (Ooh, look it's working!)

Alright, I, Nymphadora Andromeda Margaret Madeleine Katherine Bethany Eliza Muirgheal Violet Mallory Mary Tonks (no joke, I really do have 34 syllables in my name) am going to tell you about myself. Yay. Go me. I rock. Oh yeah.

Ok, as of May 26, I am seven years old. I was born on May 26, 1970. And yes, I repeated that because right now you're a bit uneducated, diary. No offense or anything. I like jelly slugs, Star Wars, (I know it's Muggle, but isn't it just AWESOME? And I am not even going to tell you what that is. You, my dear, darling diary, should be born with that knowledge. And you know, (wait, of course you don't know) you were actually born yesterday. I'll get into that later, after I'm done listing things.) the color purple, the colors red and gold (GRYFFINDOR!!), the colors yellow and black (HUFFLEPUFF!!), koalas, violets (one of my few middle names I actually like), and basically everything that a normal 7 year old likes.

Ok, about you. My mother, Andromeda----lots of middle names which I don't want to list----Tonks (maiden name: Black. I know, major eeurgh) gave you to me yesterday, under the disguise of "write in this so the next time we see you, we can read it and see all the wonderful things you've been up to!" What she really meant was "I'm not going to let you get away with any pranks while I don't have an eye on you, so I'm making sure that you write in this, and, while I'm at it, I want you to become more girly, because you, Nymphadora Andromeda Margaret Madeleine Katherine Bethany Eliza Muirgheal Violet Mallory Mary Tonks, are a tomboy, and while I'm at it (again), I do wish you would use all those nice pink bows and lace hair ribbons that I got you for your birthday, because they're ever so pretty, and you would look so becoming with them on. And darling, do grow out your hair, I can't believe your father let you get that awful jagged haircut. Oh, it would look so pretty if it was just at your waist, and then maybe we could get you some pretty pink skirts with flowers on them and these nice blouses with little buttons and flouncy……." At which point I would cut her off, because, above all things, I HATE flounces.

Ok, (why do I say that so much? Am I that agreeable?) Here's the catch, the snag, the scoop, the you get the picture. I am going to Hogwarts. When I'm seven. You see, my parents are part of the Order of the Phoenix, and You-Know-Who is looking for them, and the ten billion other people who are part of the Order. Dumbledore, being the guy he is, let all the kids of these people who are under eleven to come to Hogwarts and, well, hang out and live there, I guess, because it's safe. Anyway, I got the invite yesterday, and my mum said right away "She's going Albus, no matter how reluctantly."

And here I am.

It sucks, doesn't it?

Ok, my mum's calling me right now, probably wants me to try on an ancient frilly pink skirt she found in the basement.

Later later later later

Yup, she found the skirt. You know, I unearthed it a couple of years ago and packed it up again, knowing Mum'd make me wear it, but it looks like I didn't pack it deep enough, because she's got it again. She wants me to wear it on September 1st, probably along with a pink shirt with poufy sleeves and lacy socks and pink shoes and some kind of pink lace hair bow.

Later later later later later

Wow, in my last entry my outfit guess was completely 100 right. Aren't I amazing? And aren't I going to be so embarrassed that I'm going to die? You know, if my parents are trying to protect me, they're doing a pretty bad job because they're going to end up murdering me instead. (Sigh) sometimes my parents can be so stupid.

August 24, 1977, in my room

Sorry I haven't written in you for 4 days, my mom's had me packing 24/7. Seriously, she's so picky! "No dear, don't pack that shirt it's too grungy" "Dear, I'm going to dye those pants pink, ok? Really they'd look so adorable on you." "Dearie, I just found the loveliest skirt, look at all the lace…." "Oh, goodness, look at that book, really, I don't want you reading about Roman conquests, why don't you read Little Women?" Oh, it went on forever! Thank goodness you're here, even if you're covered in…….You don't know what you look like, do you? Well, I'll put you in front of a mirror, how about that?

Just a little bit later

Yes, I know, you're covered in lace. White and pink lace. And in the middle of your front it says in dark pink flouncy (eeurghh) letters, Diary. I know, it's not the best cover design. If my friends…….Oh golly I'm depressed.

August 29, 1977, in my room

I can't believe you!!!! WHY did you make me think about the VERY LAST thing I wanted to think about just 6 days before I have to go to Hogwarts as one of those protected people!!!???!!!??? WHY!!!!?????

Later

Sorry, I'm not too mad at you anymore. Yes, I know I haven't written in 5 days, but you made me bloody depressed. REAL bloody depressed. You see, I don't HAVE any friends. (Sniff). My only friend I ever had……Well, let's just say You-Know-Who's followers went on a killing rampage and found her family…….Well, you can guess what happened. I haven't even had a good acquaintance. And in two days I'm going to have to wear that girly-girl getup. Man, I am not looking forward to that.

August 30, 1977, Madam Malkin's

I'm in Madam Malkin's robe shop right now. Luckily I've crouched in a corner behind a huge rack of dress robes, so my mother can't come and pester me about pink robes. Yes, she wants me to wear pink robes. With lace. And ruffles. And flounces. I can't believe I'm her kid. Anyway, she sa---OH CRUD!!! She found me. Got to go.

Later, Madam Malkins

She's ringing up the pink robes. And they've got a lace trim. And poufy sleeves! And they're light pink, like a rose! Mum says I'll look like a little flower in them. I say I'll look like a diseased cormorant that stepped in a bucket of paint. I hate cormorants.

Later later, Magical Menagerie

YAY!!!! For the first time in like, a week, I am truly happy! I'm ecstatic!!! My mother said that I need to learn to be responsible (I am though!) so she bought me a kitten! He is the cutest thing on earth!!! He's gray and white and he's got these enormous brown eyes! He looks so innocent! I'm sitting here cooing over him, and you know what? My mom's getting him a pink food dish, and I don't even care! Let her get the pink food dish! Ha ha, I've got the cutest creature on earth! Nothing matters except for him!

September 1, 1977, taxi cab

Ok, I think that this matters. I am sitting in a Muggle taxi wearing an ancient pink frilly skirt, a white blouse with pink buttons and trim, a pink lace headband, white lace socks, and pink shoes with bows on them. Thank goodness I have you and Sammy the kitten (yes, that's his name), otherwise I actually would die. And that was not a joke. And all my other clothes are pink and white. Maybe at Hogwarts I can find someone to change the colors. I wish I could do magic. Oh gosh, we're pulling up at King's Cross. I'd better---HOLY SHOOT!!!

Is she gone?

Oh my gosh, my mother was reading over my shoulder the whole entire time I wrote this! Oh my, now the cab driver is looking at me weirdly. I wonder why? Oops. I was supposed to get out 3 minutes ago. Must fly. On second thought, I don't have a broom, and I'm not Peter Pan. Golly, I wish I had that book. But no, I had to get Anne of Green Gables instead. You know, I think I'll get out now.

Later, Platform 9.75

My mother is talking to someone. I was just able to get you out. Now I'm sitting on my pink trunk next to my pink carpetbag (honestly, what kind of carpet is pink?) with Sammy's pink cage and pink accessories and a pink umbrella on my other side. I'm drowning in a pink sea here. People are walking past and laughing. One person called me "pinky". One person who looked like a first year looked at me and said "Well, I don't feel all that stupid anymore." and walked away. A seventh year came up and said "Are you one of those protected little kids?" When I nodded he just went "Ha ha, sucks to be you!" I feel neglected and insulted.

Who is my mother talking to anyway? Ah, it's my cousin! His name's Sirius. My mother's asking him if he's been eating enough vegetables. Apparently he's been eating chocolate gateau for breakfast, lunch, and dinner. Now my mum's fishing around in her handbag. Oh my. She's got one of those ultimate vitamin pills. Now she's trying to force it into his mouth…..And he's run away. Phooey. I wish I could have talked to him. Now my mum's turning to me….

"Dear, it's 10:50, we'd better get you a seat"

And then I said, "We? No, there isn't a 'we'. I'm going on the train myself, mums don't go into the train and find their little babies a seat. I'll be perfectly fine."

Oh, I loved that expression on her face.

And now I'm dragging all my pink stuff down the corridor of the train. At least I'm trying to. I'm trying to kick my trunk, my umbrella, well, I don't know where I left it, my carpetbag's around my neck, and Sammy is mewing in fear as his cage is swinging madly from my left hand. A boy with red hair just came up, I wonder what he wants…….

Later later, train compartment in the last carriage

Well, I haven't written in you in thirty minutes, and what an eventful thirty minutes they've been. I'd best start from where I left off……

The guy walked up and said "Hi, do you want help?"

And then….What do you think I said, "No, you look like a banana?" Of course I said yes!

So we both kicked my trunk, I carried Sammy, and he carried my carpetbag. Around his neck. He said he thought it to be the height of fashion, and he doesn't know why everybody isn't wearing carpetbags slung fashionably about the neck. I like him, he sure can make somebody feel at ease. Oh yeah, he said this.

"I'm William Arthur Weasley, but just call me Bill."

And I said: "Nice to meet you, I'm Nymphadora Andromeda Margaret Madeleine Katherine Bethany Eliza Muirgheal Violet Mallory Mary Tonks, but just call me Tonks."

I have never seen anybody's jaw drop so low.

Anyway, we were kicking the trunk and chatting, when a person who looked about 15 years old and a lot like my cousin Sirius came into the corridor. At first I mistook him for Sirius.

"Hi Siri….." I stopped as I saw the malicious grin on his face.

"Think I'm my blood traitor idiot brother do you?" he sneered.

"You know, I did," I said "but now I don't so we'll just be leaving now."

"Oh no," he said "I do like little seven year olds, won't you come in?"

"No, we won't" said Bill, "let's go Tonks."

We started to walk forward (still kicking my trunk) when the boy, Regulus, as I now realized, stopped us.

"You two dorks shouldn't come back here, you go up front."

"But the front is full, please let us pass," said Bill

"The back's full of Gryffindors and Hufflepuffs, don't associate with them."

"My mother was in Gryffindor and my father was in Hufflepuff," I said, "I've got no problem with them."

"Yes," said Bill, "just let us thr"

"Oi, Regulus," said a voice, a familiar one, "picking on these 7 year olds?" I realized it was Sirius. We were saved! "If you want to practice your unforgivables, do it on your friends, will you? They all deserve it."

Regulus, who was smaller than Sirius, scowled and closed the door of his compartment.

Sirius eyed me and said simply, "Nice outfit."

I then remembered what I was wearing

"My mum picked it out"

"Yeah, I figured. You two got a place to sit?"

"No," said Bill.

"I guess you can sit with us then."

"But you're, well, a seventh year" I stuttered

"Dude, Tonks, I'm not Regulus. Come on, and don't smother me in thank yous."

So he led us back to his compartment (we were still kicking my trunk), where James Potter, Remus Lupin, and Peter Pettigrew were sitting.

And here I am.

And Hogwarts is coming into view.

Oh boy. Dumbledore is probably going to make a big long speech about the protect-ees. I'm not looking forward to this. At least I know Bill, he's exactly my age and he's got to be protected. "The youth are first in priority" his mother said. At least he said she said.

Well, I hope for better days ahead. We've parked at Hogsmeade station. I'm putting you away, and I'm going to obsess over Sammy until I have to get off. Toodle-oo!

I hope you liked it. It's my very first fic, I'm sorry if it's bad, I don't have ANY experience. Not to blame my experience. If it's bad, it's my fault, because I didn't take it from anybody. Except JK Rowling. Come on, this is fanfiction. Please review, and if any of you like it, I will definitely carry on. Actually, I'll carry on anyway, but if you like it, I'll carry on with more joy in my heart. Oh, some of Tonks' middle names are some of my friend's names, and Sammy is the name of one of my friends' cat. Just if you were wondering.