"OH MY GOD!" A scream rang throughout the crime lab. Nick and Warrick looked up from their files, Gil poked his head from his office, Hodges, Henry, and Archie were awakened from their midnight dazes.
Greg came scrambling into the lab, bag dangling off his hand as if he had scooped it up in a hurry. Grissom intercepted the boy's mad dash for a broom closet.
"What is it, Greg?" He asked, wary of his constant movement. Greg let out a whimper.
"Catherine's PMSing!" He cried, throwing his hands in the air. Grissom shook his head in amusement.
"How do you know this?" He asked.
"When you grow up with three sisters, you learn to keep track of these things or get battle scars." Greg explained, running a hand through his massive spikes.
"I still don't see why it's such an apocalypse…" Grissom said.
"Because Wendy is too." Greg said, and on cue, Wendy and Catherine walked--more stormed--into the lab doors and huffed to their respective stations. On the way, Catherine bumped into Warrick and screamed at him, "Watch it, Afro!" Grissom became uneasy--hell hath no fury like a woman in mid-PMS--but kept his calm demeanor steady.
"That's still not so bad, Greg." He stated simply.
"It is when Mandy and Ronnie and Sara and Sofia have it too." His voice was now the figure of panic, and he hopped from one foot to the other, as if preparing for a run. Grissom suddenly was overcome by a shocking wave of fear as a series of shrieks and snaps filled the air.
"Oh, God." He muttered, as the third woman of horror came to display herself. Ronnie, usually either cheerfully bouncing about or going on about her life, slouched in, black hair frizzed and uncombed to a state of terror, mouth lazily slung into a grumpy frown, modestly dressed in an oversized gray sweatshirt and torn jeans. As she passed Henry, she snatched the apple he was eating and shoved him into the wall.
Greg wiggled out of Grissom's grasp to duck under a table at the arrival of Sara. She, the fiercest of the Vegas women, had her hair in a messy ponytail, sporting baggy men's jeans and a T-shirt that hung off of her like a bag.
"Hello, Sar--" Grissom attempted to greet his girlfriend, but was rewarded with a punch in the shoulder and a growl--yes, a growl. Fearfully, Greg poked his head from underneath the table to see what was going down. Upon seeing Sara two feet from him, he sunk back down without a peep.
"What'ya want, old man!?!" Sara shrieked in Gil's face, causing him to jump back in shock. With a snort, the dragon turned on her heel and stalked off to kidnap a princess. Only then did Greg dare fully straighten himself from the shield of a table.
"Ha." He said simply. Barely had the words left his mouth than further activity disrupted the lab.
Enter Mandy, dressed normal enough, looking normal enough. Her voice, however, was not normal enough. It was so scratchy and hoarse it hurt to listen to. Taking off her glasses, tears began to stream down her face in rapids.
"Are you alright, Mandy?" A voice asked behind her. There was Warrick, unbeknownst to the impending crisis. Mandy's eyes turned to fire underneath the saltwater.
"No, I'm not alright! Not at all!" She sobbed, pushing past the wide-set man and running off, into the ladies' room. She had left Warrick confused and flabbergasted.
No sooner had that one left than another one entered.
Sofia Curtis entered the lab, hair askew as if she had just fallen over, jeans torn, face red and steaming.
"NICK!" She screamed, making fairly much everyone duck under their tables in fear of earthquakes. Greg, already being there, simply crawled onto his stomach and shielded his head.
Poor Nicholas Stokes, bless him, turned around innocently, genuinely confused as to what he did. He got his answer when Sofia grabbed him by the collar and shoved him against the wall with that infamous detective strength.
"Wh-what?" He sputtered, raising his hands in surrender. Sofia growled.
"You know what, you little punk!" It was an odd use of the phrase, as Nick had a good two feet on her. Not that it was a best for him to be pointing that out, what with Sofia's knee inches from his…sensitive area.
"I…I really don't!" He exclaimed, eyes darting to Grissom, who could do nothing but stare in shock. No man in his right brain cells and…manhood would dare take another step towards the savage an her prey.
"Yes you do! You ate all the freaking donuts, didn't you! Don't lie to me, Texan Dough Boy!" Sofia's face was inches from Nick's, who was blinking rapidly. He shook his head. Sofia screamed and viciously brought her knee up between his legs.
Leaving Nick howling in pain and curdled over, the blonde detective stormed off. After seeing that display of poison, several men covered their parts and jumped out of her way.
It was worse than one could imagine. Six women PMSing at the same time was, in a word, the most horrifying experience every were they to experience in their lives. And afterlife. And the next life. And the afterlife after that. And so on for all of all of humanity. Dear lord.
"Grissom?" Greg peeped from under the table, sticking his head out not an inch. Grissom looked down, for once in his career frightened, genuinely frightened.
"Yes, Greg?" He quivered, voice cracking.
"I'm scared."
A\N-Alas, I fear I shall have to end this little number here. Perhaps a sequel is in the works, but not another chapter. R&R if you want this to be continued!