Author's Note: Thanks to Sarah for the beta. All mistakes are mine.

Warnings: Spoilers for episode 03x17 "Sunday"

Waking

by LilRicki

"Teyla, love, how are you doing?"

Through the haze, Teyla felt a warm grip encircle her hand. She slowly lifted her eyelids, offering Carson a weak but genuine smile.

The doctor's return smile crinkled his eyes. "You're going to be just fine. We're going to put you to sleep now, for the surgery. Do you understand?"

Teyla managed a slight nod. "Yes," she exhaled, already feeling a deep lethargy.

"Good, lass. Just relax. I'll be here when you wake up."

His hand slipped from her grasp, and she drifted away.

--SGA--

She awoke to a silent, dimly lit infirmary. Slowly, she turned her head on the pillow until her gaze fell on the figure at her bedside.

John sat, elbows on his knees, head and hands hanging down. Everything about him spoke of a deep weariness.

"John?"

The pilot raised his head, a slow, strained smile lifting one corner of his mouth, and Teyla saw that what she had mistaken for exhaustion was something else altogether.

"Teyla. Good to see you awake." There was none of his usual flippant charm in the words.

Teyla's heart clenched inside her. "What is wrong?"

The smile faded and John dropped his gaze to the floor, breathing deeply before looking up. A cold ball of ice formed in her stomach.

To his credit, John did not hesitate. Teyla deserved to know, immediately, and without dissembling. It was why John had kept vigil at her bedside. But Teyla saw that it pained him, as surely as it tore her heart to hear it.

Tears found their way to her eyes long before he finished. She knew. She'd known since she'd awoken to the silence and the gnawing pit in her stomach that had irrationally refused to go away.

So when John paused, met her eyes, and let the words "Carson was killed in the explosion" fall from his lips, Teyla merely closed her eyes and let the tears flow in silent earnest. If John had any reaction, she didn't see it.

Teyla was no stranger to loss. None of her people were. And as their leader, she had learned to be the pillar of strength everyone needed.

A small sob escaped her.

She turned her head and let hot tears soak into the pillow, giving in to the small, petulant voice that echoed through her mind, if only for a moment.

He said he'd be here when I woke up.

--SGA--

Author's Note: Feedback, of both the positive and constructively critical kinds, is much appreciated.