Vivere: To be Alive
Pairing: Stella/Noctis
Prompt: 001 Touch / Make me feel alive
Warnings/Spoilers: None
Authors Note: Written for 30 Confessions, and is somewhat inspired by Final Fantasy XIII
Summary: Every day since she has been branded with the mark of Etro. She has started to feel less human a certain sense of numbness. Only question is can he help her or is she too far gone?
Her lips curls into a small frown as gently trace the mark of Etro.
Ever since she first received it a couple weeks ago, she has slowly started to feel less human. It had started to be little things, but now when she kills a man.
She doesn't feel anything.
No sadness, no anger or happiness.
Just a certain sense of numbness. She doesn't even laugh Risus jokes or foolish attics anymore or even enjoy riding with Noctis on the back of his motorcycle anymore. She wonders if her being branded by Etro is the cause of that.
The worst part of the manner is she knows that Noctis is suspicious. She would sometimes see glancing at her with a concern look in his eyes. Although she silently knows that he will never bring it up in front of his friends.
Whenever his friends ask if anything is wrong with her. She would usually lie and tell them she was just tired. An acceptable lie considering they often have to camp outdoors, and will usually take three hour shifts.
Maybe she feels a small sense of pleasure knowing that they will be resting in an inn for the night before heading back on the road. Not to mention she gets the room to herself considering she is the only female in the group.
She blinks hearing a soft knock at the door, and she almost instantly knew who was out in the hallway waiting for her to open up the door. She also knows that Noctis is a bit stubborn especially when he feels concern for a friend.
She has to admit she has foreseen him coming to talk to her for awhile now, and who knows maybe he will know how to fix her.
She opens the door and sure enough seeing the male. Still dress in the clothes that he was wearing before.
"We need to talk," he slightly commands. She finds herself nodding at his request and opens the door wider allowing him to come in. Vaguel noticing him close the door behind himself before moving to sit back on her bed.
"Are you alright?" he questions. "For the past week you have been distant."
She sighs lightly, "When you kill somebody, what do you feel?"
He frowns in confusion, but seeing the slight seriousness in her eyes decides to answer the question. "Occasionally sadness or anger depending on who it is and what the circumstances are."
She nods. Half expecting that answer. "I don't feel anything at all. No sadness, anger or even happiness. Even to stuff that usually makes me feel happy, and I wonder if I'm still human."
Noctis frowns lightly before shifting his dark sapphire eyes towards the black tattoo type mark on her lower stomach. He slightly wonders if that was part of the reason, and if they complete task if she will return the way that she was before.
Before the mark of Etro.
"Your still human Stella," he says softly. Moving a hand to gently cup her face as he stares in her somewhat blank eyes. She move to open her lips in slight protest, but before she can anything. He instantly moves to press his lips against hers in a soft but passionate kiss.
For a minute she could have sworn she felt something.
Love?
She has to admit before she was branded with the mark of Etro. She did possess strong feelings for him. She has to admit she was greatly attracted to him, and she would even say that she might have loved him. As selfish as it might sound especially in the current state that she was in. She would do anything to reclaim that lost feeling.
"Make me feel alive," she utters against his lips. She can see the slight confusion cross his face but it only lasted a moment before he understood her words.
She has to admit he look torn.
As if he isn't entirely sure if making love isn't best route to go at the moment. Whether if it is because of his royal heritage or the fact that she can't quite feel anything at the moment.
"I love you Stella," he replies and he can almost hear the slight rejection. "But what you are asking I can't give you until I know that you are better."
She nods knowing that he is right.
If they were to make love now. She knows that there is a strong possibility that she might not feel anything, and it wasn't necessary fair to either of them if they go through with it. Of course she also knows that Etro might not "heal" her either.
"Can you stay with me?" she mumbles lightly at his questioning look, she continue. "It's not much but I feel traces of my old self when I'm with you."
He nods in understanding before laying himself down next to her. Maybe he can still cure her after all.
-the End