"This... could be tricky," Captain America declared.
His comrades could only concur silently. Arrayed at the open cargo hatch of a hovering Quinjet, the Avengers looked down upon the fortified H.Y.D.R.A. base which they had located in the Antarctic. In addition to sub-zero weather, in order to breach this complex they would have to brave a small nation's worth of heavily armed and fanatical soldiers armed with revolutionary weapons, not to mention the bevy of anti-aircraft and anti-personnel artillery which was even now drawing a bead upon them. And lest anyone forget, there were bound to be nasty surprises in the form of super-soldiers, genetically engineered monsters, or time-traveling cyborg sons who had been raised to hate their freedom-loving parents with a passion. To put it simply, things did not look good.
"Anybody feel like checking out early?" Black Widow hid any discomfort behind sultry snark, but even she was not feeling up for this particular mission. Bruce Banner looked more queasy than angry, which did nothing to improve their chances of victory. Meanwhile Hawkeye's matchless gaze scanned the heavily fortified complex. "I could think of easier ways to collect on life insurance," he affirmed. "But if we're gonna do this, we might as well get it over with."
"Relax, everybody, don't go charging in just yet! I got it covered."
They all turned to find Tony Stark emerging from the cockpit. He then moved to stand before a large transport container set off to one side and began pressing a few buttons. Once he had keyed in the access code, the pod split open with a rush of steam. From it there stepped something that resembled another Iron Man armor, only with glowing blue eyes and mouth.
"G-r-e-e-t-i-n-g-s, A-v-e-n-g-e-r-s," a robotic voice intoned from that walking arsenal.
"Everyone..." Tony gave a grandiose flourish at this new addition to the crew, like a stage magician at a county fair, "... meet Ultron! He's a self-evolving AI that I developed to help us crack tough nuts like what we're facing here, armed with the latest and greatest in Stark threat-neutralization gear!" He led his new creation over to the open hangar door. "I figured this would be the perfect opportunity to get some real combat data on him. So here's the deal: Ultron will go in and gather intel on the enemy's capabilities while engaging them. Once he's flushed out the rats, so to speak, we'll have a much better idea of what we're dealing with! And best of all, this way nobody gets hurt."
An explosion in mid-air rocked the craft, causing everyone to grab onto something for support. More followed, and soon the sky of the South Pole was alight with mortar shells.
"Well, nobody important," Tony clarified.
The other Avengers exchanged dubious glances. Surprisingly, their distress was mirrored in the Ultron bot, which was peering somewhat uneasily at the fortress now spewing bullets, missiles, and glowing balls of screaming destructive fury at them. It turned to its creator. "A-h-h... M-r. S-t-a-rk... I W-o-n-d-e-r I-f P-e-r-h-a-p-s T-h-i-s I-s N-o-t T-h-e M-o-s-t T-a-c-t-i-c-a-l-l-y I-n-s-p-i-r-e-d S-t-r-a-t-e-g-y."
"No worries, buddy! We'll be right behind you." And Tony smiled gamely. "Now, off you go, Ultron!"
"B-u-t S-u-p-p-o-s-i-n-g W-e W-e-r-e T-o...
"OFF YOU GO!" And with that, the billionaire booted his creation out the door towards the certain destruction that awaited below.
"Sooo," Hawkeye mused as the cannons began concentrating their fire at that plummeting lead balloon. "How long should we give your tinker toy before we go in?"
"Oh, there's no need for that." So saying, Stark pressed a button. The hatch began to shut. "It occurs to me I'll get better test data if we make this a solo mission. Let Ultron rise to the challenge and soften 'em up as much as he can. I'll receive a notification if he gets destroyed, so we'll know to step in." He then trotted nimbly back to the cockpit and retook the wheel. "In the meantime, why don't we all head home and relax until he's done?"
The others considered this. After a while, they all came to the conclusion that, heartless as it may be, sacrificing one machine certainly sounded better than risking one of their member dying. And they could always return if things turned out bad.
After all, what's the worst that could happen?
Six hours later...
Reclining in the plush comforts of Stark Tower's penthouse suite, partaking of Tony's unrivaled selection of fine liquor, the Avengers were all surprised when the doors behind them opened with a swish.
"HEY! WHAT'S UP, GUYS?!"
There stood Ultron. Or rather, what was left of him. The robot looked like it had been put through an industrial-strength garbage disposal. It limped into the room on its one good leg, popping and sparking, bits and pieces falling off its ravaged soot-blackened form as it went. The team of superheroes rose slowly, stunned speechless at this chilling sight.
"WE HAVIN' A PARTY?" The ruined robot came to a halt and surveyed them all, swaying from side to side. "HOW COME I WASN'T INVITED, HUH? I LOVE PARTIES! WHAT ARE WE CELEBRATING? MY METAL CAN GETTING CHEWED OFF? AWW, THAT'S SWEET!"
"Ultron, you..." Bruce Banner began.
"HUH? WHAT'S THAT? GONNA HAVE TO SPEAK UP, DOC! THINK THERE'S SOMETHING IN MY EAR!" There was indeed a rather nasty-looking scimitar embedded point-first in its skull, but no one felt quite right about pointing that out.
"SO I BET YOU'RE ALL WONDERING HOW I GOT THIS WAY!" Ultron indicated down its smashed and pitiful frame with one arm, which was currently being held in the grip of the other arm. "WELL, IT'S A FUNNY STORY! THERE I WAS, MINDING MY OWN BUSINESS, JUST FIGHTIN' BADDIES LIKE I WAS ASKED AND WAITING FOR THE BACKUP TO SHOW! WHEN SUDDENLY IT OCCURRED TO ME... NO BACKUP! MORE IMPORTANTLY, NO QUINJET! AT FIRST I THOUGHT YOU GUYS GOT SHOT DOWN! THEN, AFTER THE MUTANT ZOMBIE DOBERMANS BUT BEFORE THE CRIMSON WAVE WITCH AND PROFESSOR ZOOM SHOWED UP - AND LET ME TELL YOU, HE WAS A SPEEDY LITTLE DEVIL! - I HAD MYSELF AN EPIPHANY! YOU GUYS HAD BEAT FEET! LEFT ME THERE TO FIGHT ALL BY MY LONESOME! HOW 'BOUT THAT?"
Thor had the good grace to look ashamed. "Verily, we intended to come to your aid, to be sure, however... even immortality has its limits, and Stark did declare-"
"MADE ME KINDA MAD, I'M NOT ASHAMED TO ADMIT! YUP! PRETTY GOSH-DARN MAD!"
"Maybe we should get Tony." Black Widow looked around somewhat worriedly.
"SO MAD I MIGHT JUST DECIDE TO TURN ON THE WHOLE HUMAN RACE!"
The furious robot's eyes were flashing from blue to red, and in those lurid blood-stained depths they could clearly see a very dark and bloody future unrolling behind its eye-sockets. Not just for them, but for all of mankind itself. A palpable air of menace was now evident in the room. And the Avengers felt a collective and certain belief that the safety and fate of their world rested on what they chose to do next.
As if on cue, the bathroom door opened right behind Ultron, and out came Tony Stark toweling off his face.
"What's with all the yelling, guys?" He drew up short upon spying his tattered AI. The robot's twitching head revolved painfully on its half-chewed neck as it took in the sight of its creator. "Oh, Ultron. You're back! I'm so glad to see you made it!"
Those glowing eyes blinked uncertainly, now seeming to settle more towards the tranquil blue of before than that hideous apocalyptic red. Everyone watching held their breath. Could it be that they might yet be saved?
"You came at just the right time." And with that, Tony reached up and placed his empty whiskey glass in the robot's severed hand. "Get me a refill, okay, big guy? Make it two while you're at it. And remember, no ice."
He then strolled out of the room.
Ultron stared at the glass it held. The Avengers, for their part stared at Ultron.
"I think..."
Glowing red pits rose to train on them.
"... therefore, I am."
That metal fist clenched, and glass shattered.
"Age of Ultron, baby," a chillingly soft voice declared, as the wall behind it erupted in robots.
FIN.