WARNING: There are some SPOILERS.
"Donuts are Back!" as sung by Vash the Stampede
(with help from most of the Trigun cast)
A parody to "Baby Got Back" by Sir Mix A lot
Knives: Oh my God, Legato. Look at his mouth.
Legato: It's so full.
Knives: He looks like one of those obsessed mamma's boys.
Legato: (rolls eyes) Who understands those mamma's boys.
Knives: People only talk to him because he has high metabolism, okay? I mean, his mouth….
Legato: It's just so… full.
Knives: I can't believe it's so stuffed.
Legato: He probably can't even talk. I mean, it's gross.
Knives: Look, he's just so… Whacked!
(cue music)
Vash: I like donuts and I cannot lie.
You other gunmen ought'a try
These sweet little things with an itty bitty taste.
When ya stuff them in your face
You go "yum!"
Wanna pull up a plate
Cuz I notice that dough is glazed!
Deep fry 'em and I'll take ten.
I'm hooked and I ain't sharin'
So Crispy!
You wanna get milk, yah?
I'll take a pit'cha
My Chapel tried to warn me
But with that do-cart she's got makes me-
Wolfwood: Vash, you're so corny. (Vash chases him off the stage)
Vash: Ooh, to refuse is a sin
Yeah, just take a look at my twin.
Now excuse me, excuse me, gotta make room for The Stampede!
The flavor's enhancin'
And my mouth's advancin'
They're sweet, neat, take em' any day over Dominique
I'm tired of Milly T.
Sayin' puddin's the only thing
Take the average bad lad and ask him that-
B.D. Neon: She's probably whacked on crack.
Vash: So Villians
Gung-ho Guns: Yeah?
Vash: Villians
Gung-ho Guns: Yeah?
Vash: Has your master got donuts?
Gung-ho: Heck no!
Vash: Well tell 'em to bake it,
Gung-ho Guns: Bake it?
Vash: Bake it!
Gung-ho Guns: Bake it!
Vash: Bake those sugar donuts
Donuts are back!
Wolfwood: Vash, I think you're a little fruity.
Vash: Donuts are back!
Wolfwood: Wait, strike that, you're just plan looney.
Vash: I like 'em round and big
And when I'm eatin' like a pig
I just can't help myself
I don't need a Confessional
To tell ya it's more then I can handle
No matta' where I roam
It's Mmm!, double yum, Mmm! Mmm!
I ain't out to annoy
Just tellin' ya they're made to enjoy
I wann'em real soft and jelly
So find that jelly double
Can't stop'n that's the trouble
I want one covered in maple
So I'm lookin' for bakery stores
Lickin' the sugar, eatin' the holes
You can keep them sweet rolls
Eat that up, will ya Legato
But word to you quick shot mistah's
I wanna snack with ya
I won't shoot or kill ya
But I gotta be straight when I say I wanna munch (sound of Vash chowing down)
Til the break of dawn
Nick, you got the whole thing wrong
A lot of coffee's just too strong
And them punks like to fake it and cake it
But I like the dough, ya know?
Cuz they're wide and they're fried
And I'm bound to put the sprinkles on
So Meryl!
Meryl: Yeah?
Vash: Meryl!
Meryl: What!?
Vash: 'Your planet caught up in peril?
Meryl: Duh!
Vash: Well turn around
Stick it out (makes the L&P sign)
Give that "Love and Peace" a shout
Donuts are Back! (Meryl leaves the room shaking her head)
Donuts are back!
Human beings,
When it comes to good meals
Legato ain't got nothin' to do with my selection
Plays mind tricks-wants more war-friend of Nick's?
(shakes head) No taste, if you ask me. (Wolfwood eyes him)
So you say I'll just get fat'tah
Eatin' donuts by the plat'tah
But we plants ain't into gaining much weight, so it don't mat'tah
My records show I won't eat none unless you make dough, bro!
You can eat salmon with sandwiches, but please or'dah donuts
So Knives wants tah say "no, no"
And tell us that donuts need to go
So he'll toss it and beat it
And I dive into the trash to retrieve it
Still afraid that you'll get fat?
Well, they're worse things then that
Cuz the world's not lost cuz your brother's bitchin'
Trust me, food's more enrichin'
To the Sunday splits and the brown pudding
You ain't the real thang
Give me a twist'ah with all the su'gah
Down bread and icing by the 'iter
Needle-noggin's tired of this
Time to make my shopping list
I'm gonna take five carts and fill 'em
And walk home slow not to spill 'em
But ladies if the pastry's round
And you got some extras lying around
Dial 1-900-EAT-ALOT and live them hungry thoughts
Donuts are back!
Donuts are back!
Come reel in the good deal cuz donuts are back!
Ideal with such appeal, those donuts are back!
Great meal. Now all squeal, "Hey donuts are back!"
Wolfwood: 'Still feel that you're unreal, and you need a smack.
(whipping sound then sound of Vash groaning)
Vash:(spoken) Hey, that hurt…. What kind of a churchman are you anyway….