Yes…well, at the advice of others and some thoughts on the idea, I've decided to continue The Mysterious Stranger, but through a sequel fanfic…
This will obviously be a self-insert, like The Mysterious Stranger, however while that was ironed out as a three-shot, I really have no exact idea how expansive this sequel shall be.
Anyway, for your information, I named The Mysterious Stranger after one of my favorite Mark Twain short stories (The one that influenced Kaworu Nagisa's creation), and I've named this sequel fic after one of my favorite Thomas Hardy novels, "The Return of the Native". It just sounded right.
Mmm? Maybe I should make my SI character have a love interest?
Ahahaha, kidding!
This may seem to be a little more serious than the often randomly inserted humor of The Mysterious Stranger, but don't worry, once I get on a roll, it'll be cool.
Anyway, let's start the show…
Disclaimer: I don't own Evangelion or its characters. Gainax does, and they rock. Who else could create both Evangelion and FLCL! I also don't own anything that happens to be referenced in this story.
Where am I?
Where would you like to be?
Is this a dream? I hate dreams…
Why do you hate yourself?
I hate you…
Is this really my dream?
No, this is your reality, at the end of your dream.
The entity known as Sanbud Tehrani drifted among the souls of the dead, of those who had lived, it made no real difference, the line between death and life had been obliterated, and all those whose souls had been within their bodies, or at least had been within their bodies within a reasonable amount of time, had been brought to this…this peace…
Pax…
Sanbud Tehrani felt warm…he felt the warmth. He felt no other tangible emotions, such as the useless plagues of love and hate that had ravaged his soul. He was overwhelmed with the emotions of the entire world, as they were overwhelmed with his. Everyone shared these useless bonds, and so they were simply negated, overwhelmed and turned into a simple warmth, something even a simple life form can appreciate.
And then it was over.
Sanbud Tehrani was born to the world once more, with an anguished scream.
Shinji Ikari groaned, feeling disorientated, tired and miserable. He had become God, he had transcended his mortal form, he had become one with the world, he had created his own reality, and he had created his own Hell. It was all a bit much for a constantly depressed teenager full of self-guilt with horribly low self-esteem.
He rolled onto his back, remembering Rei's words grimly.
At least he thought that that had been Rei…After Lillith and that the Rei faces…and the giant…He couldn't comprehend anything.
Shinji Ikari was completely unsure of one hundred percent of everything at that moment. He wasn't exactly sure what had happened, if it had stopped, why it had stopped, and where he was.
But he could see a familiar white cross laying in the sand of the beach, cursing him, reminding him. He grasped it; holding on to the deep soreness of the pain, letting it return his memories back to them, along with the sense of reality that came with them…and the pain…oh the pain was everlasting.
He sighed as he stood, looking down at the familiar girl beside him in a crimson plug suit, laying there with her eyes closed.
He remembered now, what had happened.
Shinji Ikari stalked towards the young girl, although his position was far from predatory, in fact it was as close to begging as he could standing.
He moved closer to her turned back and then finally spoke, his voice a desperate but collected whisper.
"Asuka…I want to help you, and I want to be with you forever. "
Asuka turned, staring at him with a grimace and then a growl, shaking her head slowly.
"You want to help me? Then don't do anything. Don't come to my side anymore. You will only hurt me!"
Shinji's body shook, but he continued to stride forward, determined.
"Asuka, help me! Only you can do it!"
"That's a lie. For you, anybody will do. You are afraid of Misato and Rei, too. You are afraid of your father and mother, too. You are only escaping from me. You can't feel this as being truly happy!"
Shinji could not stop, simply striding even closer, reaching his hand out abstractly for her in a gesture of hope and desperation.
"Please help me! I love you Asuka!"
She scoffed, her face twisted in rage and denial.
"You love me! You never think about anyone other than yourself! Get away from me, I hate you!"
He struggled with words, tears running down his face, but she interrupted any rebuttal with venom words.
"You only think of your own existence! You only think of yourself! You're really completely pathetic!"
Her hands shoved into him roughly, sending him flying backwards, crashing into a chair and knocking a cup of hot coffee down from the table onto his shoulder, making the pain even worse.
Shinji winced, clutching his shoulder, blood dripping from his mouth as he rose, still full of hopeless determination, actually causing Asuka to stop and stare at him with concern, if only for a few seconds.
"Asuka... Who... who can save me? Please help me... please help me... Me... please help me! Hold me…Don't ignore me! Don't ignore me! Don't kill me!"
She stood there, silent, her face no longer twisted in rage, disgust or even spite. She simply stood there, her chest expanding and detracting with every slow breath. And this silence, this meager, possible indecision gave Shinji Ikari fuel and hope, hope that his sanity could be healed.
All this was of course shattered with one word, one syllable.
"No."
It was calm and almost a whisper, which made it sting even more. Shinji knew that some of Asuka's words when she was raging were just meaningless tirades were just shows of dominance and rage. But now…her answer had been so soft, so sublimely horrendous.
He reached out, his hands wrapping around the slender deck of the girl he adored and admired.
Shinji sighed, unsure of the reality of that moment. It had been the Impact…the madness. He had thought it had been real…and apparently it had been, for she lay there now, not moving at all whatsoever.
The former Third Child looked out about the beach, and the ruins of Tokyo 3 in the distance. For now his focus rested on the idle pieces of driftwood on the sandy shore. This would be enough for now.
Sanbud Tehrani emerged from the red liquid, feeling violated, feeling cold, feeling alone. He had been lonely and cold before, yet it has all been relative, now it was absolute. It was not a state of mind that changed as frequently as the seasons; it was a state of life, a state of being. He was alone, and we would die alone.
He was still in his dark gray plug suit, the one he had worn…when.
I died…I think…but…there was something after…
He looked down at where there was supposed to be a gaping hole in his chest, caused by an angel, however it was now fair, fine skin, the only hint of anything astray being the ragged rip in the plug suit where the hole had been.
He stumbled forwards on the beach, ignoring the surroundings about him, and collapsed onto his back, staring at the odd objects floating in the dead sky, fully intending to lie there for eternity, or until he got hungry and his resolution crumbled.
Is this the best you
can do, God!
A few minutes later, he was glad that his question had not been answered. Or perhaps the horrible absolute silence was the answer.
Shinji Ikari stood in satisfaction at his creation, a makeshift masterpiece indeed.
He had planted four crosses in the sand, on small mounds, and each had a different name crudely scrawled into it. He read them off somberly as his eyes drifted around his work.
"Rei Ayanami…Gendo Ikari…Yui Ikari…Misato Katsuragi."
He lay the white cross he had found on the last mound, and then peered at two other crosses.
They lay in the dirt on top of each other, not in any mound, in front of two deep holes Shinji had spent what seemed like and most probably was, hours digging.
"Shinji Ikari and Asuka Sohryu…"
He sighed as he turned around, preparing to grasp the limp redhead behind him by the ankle and slowly pull her into the grave.
"I'm sorry it had to end this way…Asuka…I love you…"
Saying those last three words made him feel alive in the dead world, made him feel warm.
Suddenly a hand shot out, slapping his hand away from Asuka's ankle, a delicate hand clothed in a red plug suit.
He stumbled backwards, eyes widening, mouth gaping in near fear as Asuka Langley Sohryu rose from the ground, regarding him with calm, emotionless eyes.
She spoke, her voice a hoarse whisper, a shadow of its past self.
"You're…not going to bury me…Shinji Ikari…go ahead and bury yourself if you want…"
Shinji Ikari gasped, his mind rushing with flame, his hand twitching. He slowly rose, staring at her; he could see the disgust in her eyes. She had no need to tell him she felt it, he could see it transparent.
She would leave him, reborn, resurrected, alone, it did not matter, she would leave him. He was fated to always be alone. Unless she had changed, unless she had realized the deeper meaning to his words of entreaty. He stared at her sadly, reaching his hand out abstractly for her in a gesture of hope and desperation.
Asuka Langley Sohryu actually flinched from the gesture, what Shinji identified as disgust was more likely fear; apathy clothed in rage and dominance was comfortable you see, and to see the grayness crumble now sent Asuka into misery.
She simply turned tail, running down the beach as the wind whipped up, perhaps sensing the pure tension of the last remaining humans on earth, whipping up dirt and sand between him and the fleeing Second Child.
He stood there, clenching his fists, squinting his eyes, stopping the tears. He was tired of crying.
I don't want to die… I don't want to die… I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die… I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die … I don't want to die alone…
He dashed off in the direction he thought Asuka had gone, wind blowing up a cloud of dust in front of him and stinging his eyes.
The former Third Child stumbled forward, falling face first in the dirt, groaning, and then noticing an odd presence next to him. He could sense something.
Rising, he peered at the ground and discovered the body of former Fifth Child, Sanbud Tehrani.
This must be part of my test…my torture…my Hell…
Shinji stared down at the boy, his face twisted in a grimace, guilt obvious in his eyes. Here was another memory for him to bury, another piece of his guilt.
If I only I hadn't been so enraged after Touji, or at least calmed down enough so they didn't suspend me…then I could've gone into battle instead of this…dead body…In my rage at the loss of an innocent life, another was lost…I should've died, I should've fought. It would've been so much easier sacrificing myself and being forgotten…
Suddenly, Sanbud Tehrani's eyelids snapped open, revealing grim dark brown orbs. They stared at Shinji emotionlessly, as Shinji stared back with visible shock and confusion.
Why is he…How is this possible?
That line of thinking was through both of the boy's minds, although they addressed drastically different, deeper thoughts.
Shinji, of remorse and guilt, and Sanbud…
The former Fifth Child's face twisted into a pure visage of furious anger and animalistic rage as his hands sprang around Shinji Ikari's neck, pressing against them in a passionate chokehold.
Shinji let out a moan of confusion as he looked down in Sanbud's eyes, clouded in fury.
"I'll…kill you!"
Well, hope you liked this starting, debut chapter…Remember, this is a sequel…so I hope you did read The Mysterious Stranger…Everything will be explained as this fanfic goes along, and hopefully it'll be interesting and I won't regret continuing it.
Well, see you next chapter.