Dreaming of Demons

Chapter One - Night Terrors

As usual, everything in my dream was familiar, from the choking waves of fire racing over boiling pits, spitting acrid smoke around that consumed everything in sight. I couldn't breathe or open my eyes, only scream as my senses began to disappear one by one. That truly was an awful feeling, like drowning in the sea. Your hands reach up towards the surface, but it is always out of reach. You begin to sink further with no control at all, then, right on que, everything goes black. By this point I knew I was dreaming, but waking was impossible. I knew what was coming. I could already hear the moaning voices as the shapes followed, dragging themselves out of the shadows. The faceless creatures that plagued my mind were after me again, they hollowed eyes bleeding black blood as they spat out putrid yellow globs of slime that burnt into a thin floor of glass that swayed horrible as though I were on a rollercoaster, staring at the floor as I roared past. I had no other choice, so I ran without looking back. I ran as I cried out with my hands reaching for that surface that was far too high above…

"Mai!"

Every muscle in my body jerked as I awoke with a start. My eyes shot open and stared around, expecting those horrible beasts to be upon me… but instead I found myself looking into the light brown eyes of my roommate, Mikoto.

"You were dreaming again, Mai," she explained as she sat down beside me on my ruined covers. "You woke me when you started crying out."

I didn't even remember becoming vocal in my dream at this point, but I took her word for it as the terror remained fresh in my mind. I apologised to her and laid my head back on the pillow, allowing it to sink into the soft material, but I would not be sleeping again that morning or the night to come.

Mikoto frowned and bent over me to stare directly into my face. "Mai, when will your dreams stop?" she asked. "You're making me worry…"

I sighed and tried to convince her that I was okay with a smile, but it would not come easily. I felt like crying and thrashing around in a tantrum. Would I ever be able to sleep without having these nightmares?

The day before I had fallen asleep during my English class, only to be woken by a very frustrated Midori in front of the entire class. She sent me outside to have a few words with me, and I found that she was surprisingly worried for my health despite her fit of rage moments before.

"Mai, if you're having problems, maybe you should speak to a counsellor," she suggested. "I know you don't like pouring your heart out to people often, but I think it could really benefit you. I mean, you can't keep going like this."

I swallowed and leaned against the wall tiredly. "But I'm not having problems, that's the thing."

"Really?" Midori looked unsatisfied. "You have barely spoke to us other Himes' at all, not even Mikoto or your brother. It's like you've, I don't know… hidden yourself away."

Those words had stuck in my mind since that talk. She was right, I had taken myself away from people, but it was because I needed to work out what I was going to do now. The carnival was over, everyone was with us again, and we were all a happy little group… but what was I supposed to do now? I didn't call my brother anymore over the phone, I barely shared any words with anyone at all, and I no longer even spoke to myself on a regular basis. I was too busy wrestling with my thoughts, tyring to figure out which road I would take.

I had a theory of why this was to intense, and that was simply because control had been returned to me. Since being thrown around in the carnival without a choice in my fate, I had finally been blessed with the wheel again so I could steer myself, but to where? That decision seemed very important now, because I did not want it to go away like before.

"Mai?"

Mikoto sat back to give me room to sit up. "I'm fine," I said quietly. "I just need to eat something."

I knew that I had not convinced her, but we would argue about that later, no doubt. I pulled myself out of my tangle of sheets and began to dress myself, not discomforted at all about Mikoto's watchful eyes as I was much too tired to really care at that moment.

During breakfast I almost fell asleep on my plate. Mikoto had to shake me back to reality numerous times before a sudden knock at the door returned all of my senses immediately"Natsuki, what brings you to our room?" I asked as I opened it to my friend.

As usual, she was not that kind, but that was just her nature. She entered without a word, nodded a greeting to Mikoto, and then turned with annoyance on her face. "I heard that you turned down the idea of help," she said, sounding just like Midori had: Concerned and irritated.

"Look, this is my problem to deal with," I said, getting a little angry. "I'll get though this, I just need to…"

As I trailed off, she rolled her eyes. "See? You have no idea. Damn it, Mai, I'm worried! We all are!"

"I know, I know," I said, running a hand through my hair.

"Tate has lost the plot," Natsuki continued, giving me a critical hit. "He keeps asking about what to say to you because he is afraid you will push him away." She paused with a smile on her face before adding, "He's such a girl."

I lowered my eyes to the floor. "I wouldn't do that to him."

"But you have," she went on, sitting down beside Mikoto on the floor and staring up at me. "You haven't let anyone you care for anywhere near you. Honestly, I'm surprised you opened the door to me."

"Don't be absurd! Of course I did," I defended myself. I was about to continue to make my case sound much stronger than it really was, but a wave of dizziness that had been building over the exhausting weeks crashed over me and I found my feet unable to hold me up anymore.

"Shit!" Natsuki growled as she ran forward with Mikoto on her heels. She caught me and leaned me against the wall, saying to me, "That's it, were getting you some help."

This time I did not fight back.

"Hmm… Most recurring dreams are the result of something that is missing in the person's life."

"Huh?"

"Well, is there anything that you feel you don't have anymore?"

I shook my head. "The only thing that has changed is now I have control." I went on to tell the doctor my theory, and he nodded thoughtfully with a triumphant smile on his face the entire time.

Natsuki and Mikoto stood together behind me, insisting they follow me in to make sure I had no more fainting spells, despite the reassuring first aid certificates the doctor held.

As I finished, he nodded his head and clapped his hands together. "That's it. I think you have hit the nail right on the head there, Mai. I think that your life is desperate to know where it should head next, and you're frightened that something like your personal traumatic experience will occur again."

I had not told him about the carnival, of course. Instead I told him it was too personal to say, instantly calming down a tense Natsuki whom obviously thought I was tired enough to make such a mistake.

"But no one else who was involved has had something like this happen to them," I said angrily, resiting the urge to punch the desk in front of me. "It doesn't make any sense."

"Everyone's mind has a different way of working, and your's seems as though its barriers have broken down. The experience you fought through has weakened your mind for the moment, that is why it is so hard." He sat back to make himself comfortable as he went on to answer my question in a little more detail. "You were mainly affected during these events, right? You were in the centre most of the time, so that is why it has had such an effect on your defence mechanisms inside."

"Okay, so what do I do?" I asked as it all began to make more sense.

Unfortunately there was no real answer to this apart from, "Let your friends in and work out together where you think you should go from here, but take it one step at a time."

I did not find it overly helpful, so I left with only a mumbled 'thanks'.

********

That afternoon a plan was made with Midori, Mikoto, and Natsuki together. They left to discuss what actions to take over lunch as I moped alone in my room, sorting through my old photos to perhaps make myself feel a little better.

There were many pictures of me with Takumi. He looked so happy despite his worry for both me and himself, and then I entered the newest photos of me with Tate. It seemed we went everywhere together, and we were both always smiling. My eyes teared up as I stared down as him, my dear Tate. How could I push him away like I had been? What had he done to me to deserve that? And Takumi… what would he be thinking? That I had abandoned him? That I was fed up with listening to his fears about his heart?

With a heavy hearted sigh I laid back on my bed and let the tears flow from my eyes. What on earth were those girl's planning?

I found out soon enough.

It was about ten minutes after my breakdown in my room when I heard Mikoto let herself into our room. She sounded excited as she cried out my name, and I could hear Midori and Natsuki behind her, their heavy footsteps coming towards my room.

"Damn!" I gasped as I hastily wiped my eyes dry of their fresh tears. I rose from my bed and headed towards the door with a heavy heart. I only hoped my eyes were not red as I turned the doorknob.

"Mai! Mai! Maiiiiiii!" Mikoto cried out as she dove into my arms.

"Whoa!" I gasped, letting out a little giggle. "Why so excited, Mikoto?"

"She loves our plan, not surprisingly," Natsuki said with a shrug. "Wild girl gets to go crazy in the wilderness."

Mikoto shot her an evil look.

"What do you mean?" I asked, heading towards the pair suspiciously. "Guys… What did you plan?"

Midori laughed. "Don't get so tense, Mai! It's nothing really, just a little excursion to help you become reacquainted with your good friends."

"A little excursion?" I echoed with a lowered eyebrow. "No offence, Midori, but your excursions are never small. Remember the 'harmless' trip to the Blackfield ruins? None of you grade one student's slept for a week after those so called 'fake' ghost murmurs."

Midori rolled her eyes. "Well how was I supposed to know that the place was actually haunted? I mean, who would believe the story of a three axe murders and a suicide in the same day?"

"Alright, enough about Midori's terrible excursions," Natsuki said with a sideways glance at the enraged teacher. "You don't get a say in this trip, Mai. Were going for a three night's camp in the eastern forest as a group, and it will take all of our teamwork to navigate our way around to the best sites."

"Wow, all of a sudden it's Scout Leader Natsuki reporting!" Midori teased in her act of revenge. She was rewarded with the famous 'finger' from the black haired girl.

"Camp, camp!" Mikoto cried as she gripped my arm and jumped up and down like a five year old about to get an icecream.

I exhaled deeply. "Well, I guess if I have no choice…"

******

"Umm… are there bears in this forest?" Yukino asked as we invited her personally during our next class.

"Wolves, eagles, tigers, lions, alligators… but no, no bears," Natsuki said as she tapped her fingers boredly against the table, her eyes only drifting over the maths sums on the board.

Yukino thought for a moment. "Natsuki, some of those animals are native to-"

"So how about it?" Natsuki interrupted, hating being corrected. "If you want to come, you have to get packing tonight, okay?"

Yukino automatically looked over at her love interest and best friend, Haruka, as she rushed through the maths as though it were nothing at all. She finished the set sums with a proud smile on her face and raised her arm high so everyone could see that she had completed before them yet again… as though they really cared.

"You can invite her if you want," I offered as her eyes filled with the pain of losing her, but she declined anyway.

"She hates the outdoors," she explained, giving her friend a weak smile. "I'll still ask, but I don't think the answer will be yes. She just hates bugs. Has nightmares about them and everything."

I stared across at Haruka and could not help but laugh as I pictured her nightmare of a giant mosquito chasing her down through a forest of buzzing insects.

As the day wore on, the list of names began to deplete rapidly. So far there had no one but themselves and Yukino, and next was a name that Midori had secretly added.

"Shizuru? Natsuki cried in outrage. "Why her?"

"Why not?" Midori asked, holding a hand to her heart. "I thought you two were in love."

Natsuki went bright red. "W-what? She likes me, but… well, you know… It's complicated!"

"Whatever," Midori drawled. "Well, I'm going to ask her. Come or don't, you won't stop me."

Natsuki followed, arguing all the way as me and Mikoto snickered quietly behind her back.

"She's gone red," Mikoto laughed quietly as Natsuki began to plead with Midori.

"Please, I'll do all my homework, I'll listen in class, I'll stop ditching your lessons especially!"

"Too late," Midori said with a smile as she reached Shizuru's room.

After two knocks, the door was opened by the kind woman. She beamed at the group and especially at Natsuki who refused to meet her gaze. "Hello everyone."

"Hi Shizuru. Look, we don't have a lot of time, so I'll ask you straight away… Would you like to come on a camping trip with us? Were leaving first thing after dinner tonight."

"Wow, that's quiet a rush, isn't it," Shizuru said thoughtfully as she pressed a thumb to her chin.

"You don't have to if you're not up to it," Natsuki inserted quickly. "I mean, were not forcing you."

Shizuru gave a little laugh. "I would love too, but I am afraid that the school needs me, so I could not possible abandon it."

"Not even for three nights?" Midori pestered, ignoring Natsuki as she poked her in the ribs painfully.

"No, I'm sorry, but have fun… Natsuki."

The girl went red, but she simply nodded back as Shizuru waved them away, saying she had much work to do. The group noticed that even though Natsuki had denied wanting her to come, she looked disappointed.

"Wow, what a blow out," Midori complained as she stared down at the list. More than half of the names were gone, and only three remained. Nao, Tate, and Shiho.

I could not stop staring at Tate's name. He would certainly brighten it up for me, so I was almost praying that he would say yes.

We had taken a short break after all of the rejections for simple reasons such as 'too much work,' 'I don't want to leave them behind, and 'camping just isn't my thing.' Sitting down at the café to enjoy some sundaes was a good way to heal the feeling of being 'dropped' by these people.

"Nao is next to be asked," Midori said as she stabbed her finger down on the name. "Then it's Shiho and Tate seeing as they are usually together."

That choice of words hurt, but I bit my tongue.

Natsuki sniggered from across the table. "You're seriously going to ask Nao? Hah, good luck Midori."

"Oh, I'm not asking her. I'm ordering her, and I'll drag her along if I have to."

I burst out laughing as the picture appeared in my head, worming through all of the fears and doubts of the future.

Midori seemed confident in herself. "I know she isn't my biggest fan, but I think that I can handle her. Besides, she needs to get away from this environment for a while. She is getting more hostile by the day."

"I think she misses her big spider pet," Natsuki pointed out as she remembered the Childs they once fought beside. "She certainly was attached to that thing."

"Ewww!" Mikoto gasped as she dropped her spoon of sundae on the table. "It was yucky!"

"Tell me about it," Natsuki agreed. "Do you have any idea how long it took me to get those spider webs off of my clothes?"

"Well, judging by the fact you didn't wear them again, I'm assuming you didn't try," Midori said as she studied the amount of names that now had crosses through them.

Natsuki shrugged. "Who has that sort of time?"

"You only spend your time being the Ice Queen, ditching class, glaring at everyone, being antisocial unless you are making someone feel like crap… The list goes on," the red haired teacher remarked with a smirk.

"Say that again!" Natsuki roared as she rose in her seat.

"Enough!" I growled as I pressed my hands to my head. "If the camp is going to be like this, than how is it going to help me?"

There was silence before they agreed I have a point.

"Sorry," Midori apologised, holding her hand out towards the black haired girl across from her.

With a sigh, they shook hands, then sunk back into their seats so far it was as though they were trying to sink into the leather.