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what's up?

This is my late fanfic submition for madness day 2013

enjoy

bai


Every day the same GOD DAMN THING!

Always the same thing. Blood, guts and gore everywhere around Nevada and who has to clean it all up?

ME!

The only motherfucking janitor in fucking Nevada thank you very much. Thanks to budget being cut and all the funds the sheriff gets is put into his own porn or to the training of those useless goddamn L337's or those douchy A.T.P. engineer's. It's like he doesn't even care about anything else but himself. Oh wait, HE DOES ONLY CARE ABOUT HIMSELF!

" Stupid fucking Sheriff. Stupid fucking Hank. Stupid fucking Sanford and Deimos. Stupid fucking EVERYTHING! " I scream as I slam my mop on the ground. A nearby L337 noticed this and poked me in the shoulder.

" OY! Janitor? What are you doing? That mess ain't about to clean itself you know " I was shaking. Not exactly lagging and fizzling out like tricky but I was shaking with uncontrollable rage.

" Oy!? back to WORK! " He knocked me down onto the bloodstained floor. I looked down to see a large intestine on the floor right next to my hand. I picked it up and gripped it hard. Very, hard.

" What are you do- "

He couldn't finish his sentence as I strangled him with it. I choked him out even after he died. I pulled out the pistol he had holstered just in time for a L337 and an A.T.P. to come through the door. I fired off the entire mag and filled the L337 with lead. The A.T.P. was lucky enough to find cover but still got shot in the thigh. He clutched his pierced thigh and struggled to stem the bleeding. He didn't even see me swing the mop at him. Surprisingly his head collided and splattered against the steel crate he was hiding behind. I picked up the MP5 he dropped and slung my mop behind me. I went through the doorway to the next room.

There were at least 12 people in the room. 2 were L337's, 3 A.T.P.'s and the rest were just generics and grunts holding weapons varying from pistols to shotguns. I dodge to the right and take cover behind a box as gunfire roared above me. I held up my MP5 to blind fire at them. I took a chance when I heard them reloading and glanced up. I killed one of the A.T.P.'s and the L337's along with a few grunts. I pulled up my MP5 to fire at them. I unloaded the entire clip into the crowd and took out all of them in that burst. I dropped my gun and picked up a JW2005 Full Butt. I counted the shells inside to find 4 shells. I searched the L337's corpse to find 6 more shells. I loaded in 2 shells and cocked it. I aimed the gun forward as I entered the next room. It was empty. You heard me empty. There were lockers lining the walls and crates stacked up to the ceiling. I opened on locker and found a thumper. There were two socom's inside as well. I picked up and slung a bandolier of grenades around me and holstered the pistols and extra clips on my belt. I went through the door at the far end of the room.

And then I saw hell on earth

Zombies. Fucking zombies everywhere underneath me. Luckily I was high enough they didn't notice me. I shot a grenade down to the center and a fountain of zombies followed. One lost it's lower body and caught on to the ledge. It looked up at me and futily reached up. But a few knocks to the head with the butt of my gun and he fell down to be consumed by the rest of the horde that wasn't killed by the blast or the shrapnel. They crowded around the corpse of their friend. I looked around to find a way to the other side of the room which was more elevated. It was as if the pit of undead corpses in front of me was specifically designed for someone. Then I remembered.

Hank

Of course they made this for him

I looked up and saw a pipe on the ceiling leading to the other side. I decided to drop the shotgun and one bandolier so I could reach it and make my way to the exit. I jumped up and grabbed it. I made my way to the other side and landed on the platform. The door suddenly opened for 3 L337's to enter. I fired of a grenade and killed two. The other one ran up and slashed the thumper out of my grip. I held up my hands in defense with my eyes closed. But I didn't exactly feel the steel hitting me. I opened my eyes to see him bragging his skills

" F34R M4 L33T SK1LLZ!1! " he spun his sword to his left, then to his right. Then he raised it up and brought it down to hit me. It instead hit my mop which I brought out just in time to block. It didn't even break on impact. He brought it back up to swing again but before he could I impaled him on my mop and flung him off the edge of the platform to the hellish pit below. The horde of the undead quickly swarmed all over his body ripping and tearing pieces off of the L337 agent. I proceed through the door into the next room with both pistols in hand aiming forward.

Inside I immediately duck under cover because of gunfire. Surprisingly I find Hank J. Wimbleston's two best friends both ducked under cover beside me.

" Who the? "

" No time to explain take these and wait for my signal " I said as I hand them the two pistols and extra mags. I pull off the bandolier of grenades and get ready. I look up to see them reloading and throw over the bandolier.

" NOW! Shoot the grenades! "

On instinct they aim and fire at the bandolier sending two precise shots into the grenades. They exploded and killed the agents and grunts in our way. The three of us got out of cover and went over to the next doorway. I picked up an AK 74u and a five-seven. It was apparently a lift as we opened and entered it.

" So... who are you? "

" Just the janitor who has to clean up after every mess you make " They both look down in embarresment

" Yyyyeeeaahhh sorry about that... hehehe... "

" But why are you helping us? " I shrugged

" Well theres plenty of reasons for that. One is that I want to shoot the sheriff in the balls with a minigun. Two because I want to blow off some steam and three is because I want to kill people and be a part of the cause of these messes you guys cause "

They both looked at me like I was crazy and at the same time like their only other friend in this hellhole.

" One question "

" What is it? "

" Why the mop? " He pointed to the mop slung around my back.

" Oh this? well yeah it's kind of like my signature weapon and also it's been with me since the start of my career as a Janitor "

" Bad mistake " I cut in before Deimos could say it in a more insulting manner. The lift suddenly came to a halt at a door on the fifth level of the building. This place was way, WAY bigger than I thought it was. It looked small, nearly pathetic even, from the outside but on the inside it was bigger than five three-story mansions put together. It seemed like unrealistic odds but hey. This is Nevada were talking about. The place thats famous for it's zombies and rare breed of flying whales.

" FREEZE! "

There were at least twenty A.T.P. agents with a few grunts and L337's armed with M4's in the room. Suddenly a man in a black hoodie quite litterally popped out of the ground. From the glowing red of his eyes and the audit-flames rising from his head he looked like he wasn't the person to mess with on anyday at all. He smashed the unluckiest grunt who stood at the back into the wall on the right. Next came the others that brought up the rear ending with them getting smashed together. The next had his heart ripped out of him. The next got the previous ones M4 stuck up his ass and he shot the entire magazine up his ass. The others ( who had just noticed him killing them off ) turned their guns on him and fired. The bullets just richocheted in different directions. The pleasing sound of guns clicking and running out of ammo was nearly melodic to my ears had it not been the piercing roar that followed. He clawed and tore apart every one who was left that was unlucky enough to beg for mercy. The last one had dropped to his knees pleading for mercy. He raised one eyebrow before putting on a " You've got to be kidding me " picking up the poor soul and chucking him behind him like he was some broken old toy. We walked out of the lift weapons at the ready just in case he tries something .He examined us for a few seconds before shrugging us off and walking into the lift. He pressed one button, Flashed us the bird and the door's closed.

" ... "

" The Fuck was that? " Sanford was the first to speak up.

" I don't know man but... did you see his eyes? They looked like they belonged to the auditor "

" Well then... That was a thing "

I looked over to the door at the very end of the hallway.

" Well let's keep going "


The psychotic guy with the black hoodie, Red eyes and Auditor flames coming out of his head belongs to a guy who animates madness on newgrounds named Gabrielbarsch. Check out his animations. I know he may suck a little on his first few but he improves massively later on.

Well...

Bai