A/N: Just a random idea I had when I was trying to think of an original way for Ron and Hermione to get together. It's not really HBP compliant since they're at school. I guess it could be after the whole Horcrux hunt thing, but hopefully they will have actually gotten together by then. So just imagine they are back at school for their seventh year. I hope you like it, enjoy!
The Problem
It was a normal day at Hogwarts, well as normal as a day at Hogwarts could be. The only minor disruption had been this morning at breakfast when the owls bearing the post had not simply flown out the window and returned to the Owlery, but had flown throughout the castle. However, they quickly dispersed and no one leant it a second thought.
Though now at midnight, the purpose of these owls was clear; they had delivered a message to an assortment of animals that were now pacing in front of a seemingly blank stretch of wall. A door appeared out of nowhere with a small dog-flap perfect for allowing the many owls, cats, rats, toads and a few stray newts into the room.
Once inside, a ginger cat with a rather squished-in face, who goes by the name of Crookshanks made his way to the front of the room and stood atop a kitty-sized podium and began to speak. "Pets and familiars of all Hogwarts students," he welcomed them, "We are gathered here in the Room of Requirement because here, we can all understand each other, because as I have noticed there seems to be a problem bothering nearly every human and creature within Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry, and that is the problem of-" Crookshanks paused as there was a small clunking noise that seemed to be made by something small hitting the door outside.
A moment later, a tiny, twittering owl shot through the dog-flap. "So sorry, I'm late!" it squeaked, looking flustered.
"Pigwidgeon." Said Crookshanks rolling his amber eyes.
"For the last time, it's Pig!" Pig said, "And I really am sorry for being late, but I'm only a tad late aren't I? And I really do have a good excuse, very legitimate; I choked on an owl pellet, you see, nearly died actually, and then-"
Crookshanks cut him off, "Ok, Pigwidgeon, sit down before you hurt yourself. As I was saying, we are here to discuss the problem between Ron Weasley and Hermione Granger. The two of them are fighting, arguing, quarrelling, and bickering ceaselessly. It is disrupting all of our lives, particularly the owls who are attempting to sleep while they scream at each other at the top of their lungs (Ernie Macmillan's Tawny owl, Bert gave a hearty "Hear, hear.") and the unfortunate animals that have to live with them." Crookshanks paused to harrumph, and was joined by Pig, Hedwig, Trevor (Neville's toad), Archimedes (Dean's owl), and Snowbird (Lavender's owl).
"The root of the problem, as everyone knows (but them it seems), is that they are completely and hopelessly in love with each other." Crookshanks stated.
"Of course they are." Said own of the newts (they were test subjects of Fred and George's that had escaped and now lived in the castle), "Fred and George have been taking bets about when they would get together since the Yule Ball!"
Luna Lovegood's owl Starlight piped up, "I bet they've both been ambushed by Flantabulous Bungers! Everyone knows they render you incapable of admitting your love for anyone for the next seven years!"
"Even Neville has noticed something's going on between them together, and no offense, but Neville is as dense as mercury!" said Trevor. Quite a few animals looked confused.
"Cut the intelligent talk Trevor, we don't all have as high an IQ as you." Said Crookshanks exasperatedly.
"He's very dense." Trevor simplified.
"Anyways," Crookshanks began again, "The point is, we all know they're perfect for each other, but what are we going to do about it? How are we going to get them together?"
"We're just animals. How much can we do?" asked Snowbird, Lavender's owl.
"That's why we're here, together we can do this. Does anyone have any ideas?" asked Crookshanks.
"Here's an idea cat, why don't you shut up?" hooted a particularly stuck-up owl in the back.
"Salazar…" Crookshanks hissed, "What are you doing here?"
"I heard there'd be all theses rats here and I fancied a midnight snack." He said his talon extending towards one of the rats.
"Get out." Crookshanks hissed, getting ready to pounce.
"Fine," Salazar ruffled his feathers and took flight, "I prefer mice anyways." He flew through the dog-flap, out of the room.
"Now that he's gone, does anyone have any real ideas?" asked Crookshanks once again.
"Well, we could write them letters from one another telling them to meet at a certain place." Suggested Herbert, a Hufflepuff rat near the front.
"Oh, really original," scoffed Trevor.
"No, I really think it could work." Herbert defended himself, "Sure they'll be skeptical at first, but they would never confront each other about it."
"And if they suspect Harry or Ginny, they would probably ask them, but they would honestly have no idea what they were talking about." Hedwig chimed in.
"But where would we ask them to meet? We can't exactly cook a romantic dinner for them." Pointed out Snowbird.
"We could ask them to meet here, in the Room of Requirement. Leave the romance of the situation up to their imaginations." Trevor said, warming up to the idea.
"We'll need some ink and parchment." Said Crookshanks. The words had barely left his mouth when a sheaf of parchment, a bottle of ink and a quill appeared on the floor next to him. "Does anyone know how to write human?" He asked dubiously.
"I do. And I can hold a quill with my tongue." Said Trevor, "I'm sure I can forge their signatures too."
After a few minutes Trevor had completed two notes addressed to Ron and Hermione, asking them to meet at the Room of Requirement after classes for they had something very important to tell the other.
"Pig and I can deliver them." Volunteered Hedwig.
"Ok, sounds good," agreed Crookshanks, "But make sure it's not with the morning post or if they are together otherwise they will be suspicious."
Hedwig and Pig nodded.
"Good work tonight everyone. We'll see how this turns out tomorrow. Let's say we meet outside the Room at 12:30." Crookshanks suggested. There was a murmur of assent throughout the room. "Good, see you all tomorrow then." Crookshanks concluded.
The next night Crookshanks got to the Room early to make sure the plan went accordingly. At midnight both Ron and Hermione showed up and entered the Room looking a slightly puzzled. Though he could not hear what was going on within the Room, Crookshanks was sure it could not be too bad because he did not hear any arguing or screaming.
At half-past, more animals began showing up and waited patiently for the couple to emerge. Finally Ron and Hermione came through the door looking perplexed to find a horde of animals in the hallway before them. They were further mystified when Trevor and Crookshanks engaged in a high-five when they clasped hands. They were completely befuddled when they kissed in front of the portrait hole and the entire mob of animals exploded in celebration. They slowly edged away from the animals who seemed to have gone crazy, into the Gryffindor Common Room to continue their kissing in peace.
The End.