Siyui: Are you guys ready….
FOR SOME KUNG FOO FIGHTING?
Renji: Sorry, but I don't think they are.
Siyui: Well, damn. Anyway, I am Siyui-no-Akatsuki, your host this evening, day, night, whatever! And I'm here to put a spin you your average run-of-the-mills 'Truth or Dare' story, your 'Ask the Bleach Characters' story, and your 'Talk Show' story! THIS IS ALL OF 'EM BABY!!!
Renji: But aren't there stories like this already?
Siyui: No one likes Captain Obvious, Renji. And it's not. This story is very different from the norm. It is the PEOPLES STORY! If you want something to happen, it'll happen eventually!
Renji: That'sprobably not reassuring to some people.
Siyui: TOO BAD!!! So, once ya finish readin' this chapter, send in your requests! They can be ANYTHING you want them to do, answer, or you can just tell them things!!! First five people get their own Renji! ^grabs Renji^ Don't worry, he even comes potty trained!!
Renji: GETTOFA ME! ^brushes himself off^ Anyway… Yeah. That's about it. See—
Siyui: NO RENJI!!
Renji: What?
Siyui: REEEEEEEEEEEEEENJI!!!!!
Renji: WHAT DO YOU WANT WOMAN?!?!
Siyui: …Hi.
Renji: I don't have to be part of this anymore. ^starts to leave^
Siyui: No, Renji!! Don't leave me!!! ^sniffles^ How… Why can't you accept my love?!?!
Renji: WHAT THE HELL ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT?!?!
Siyui: ^like a sappy love movie^ Why… why can't we go to like thing were before?
Renji: What 'before'?!?! There was no before!! (Crap, now I'm doing it too!!)
^Complete Silence^
Siyui: WAAAAAAAAAA!! YOU REJECTED MEEEEEEEEEEEEE!!!!!
^Continues Screeching^
Renji: Why won't it shut up?
Siyui: -- !!!
Renji: GA!
Siyui: ^shuts up^
Renji: Whoa. It'… quiet.
Siyui (?): ^appears out of nowhere^ Yup. You just need to press the off switch. ^ picks up… other self^ This thing's pretty spiffy, ain't it? Good for new story intros, disclaimers, ect. BTW people, I don't own Bleach! That's Tite Kubo's job, not mine! And Renji?
Renji: Yeah?
Siyui: Didn't you see the off switch? And what was it doing?
Renji: ^ignores first question^ Well, it confessed it's love for me.
Siyui: Wow.
Renji: Who wouldn't?
…
Siyui: ^presses button^
EPIC FAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAIL!!!
Siyui: And that was the Epic Fail button, people! So, please drop your ideas, questions, and dares, and they'll be in the next chapter!!!
Next on Let's Kill Aizen….
We push Aizen down some stairs!!
Byakuya gets harassed by some fangirls!
Ichigo finds his inner Girl Scout!
And whatever else you guys send me…!!