A/N I had a really strong urge to write this – and you can't say no to my urges. And yes, I know… this has been done at least a hundred times. One more time won't hurt, will it?
The title was going to be Warning: May Cause Harry Potter Characters To Spontaneously Combust but apparently that was too long :( Thanks to busybee6563 (jessykarr!) for helping me to come up with something original for something that's an unoriginal idea - even though the title was too long anyway.
I have no idea how many I'll do, but here's the first…
1. Hermione Granger
10. Tell her that actually, there's an organisation just like SPEW – PEE. Protection of Endangered Elves.
9. Spill pumpkin juice on Hogwarts: A History.
8. Sing 'I don't think you're ready for this jelly, my body's too bootylicious for ya babe...' whever she opens her mouth.
7. Switch her homework around with Goyle's.
6. Go to the house she lives in with the parents and say "Well. The house elf isn't doing a very good job, is he? I've heard hitting them on the head with a lamp works wonders!"
5. Invite her and Rita Skeeter to a tea party.
4. While she's sleeping, draw the Dark Mark on her arm.
3. Say 'HermyHermyHermy' repeatedly while she is trying to do homework.
2. Encourage Madam Pince to enforce a 'one book at a time' rule in the Hogwarts library.
1. Start a rumour about Ron... and Pansy Parkinson... and a broom cupboard...
.x.
A/N Like it? Hate it? Let me know if you think I should keep going or not… please review! Look at that nice, shiny purple button, just waiting to be pressed…