What Family Guy Would Never Say
Hi, just to let you know, what inspired me to write this was the author Strawbery-kitten, who did "What Tokyo Mew Mew would Never Say."
Stewey: I wish there was peace on Earth...
Meg: Beautiful mother, handsome father, perfect brothers, cute doggy! I am going to join the cheer squad! (Jumps up and down with pom poms) Give me a C! Give me a H! Give me two E's! Give me a R! What does that spell! CHEER!
Chris: Mom! Dad! I made an A on my test!
Stewey: I think I am going to go to bible school this summer.
Lowis: Peter, I don't want to have sex with you anymore... I wanna have it with Qagmire.
Qagmire: Giggidy-giggidy-giggidy-oh god! No, no! Not with Lowis! Anything, but that!
Stewey: I want to save the whales.
Peter: I want to become a vegetarian.
Lowis: I'm going to get a job.
Peter: No, forget the vegetarian thing, I'm going to become anirexic.
Meg: I love you Chris. Your so kind.
Lowis: I am going to follow my dream and become a circus clown! (Honks red nose and cartwheels out the door)
Qagmire: I think I'm gay... Peter looks sexy today!
Perverted old man who likes Chris: Chris stinks... I'm going for Lowis.
Stewey: (Singing) Jesus loves me, yes I know! For the bible tells me so! I think I am going to become a religious singer and then give my millions of dollars to the homeless.
Brian: I am going to stop drinking and become nicer to Stewey.
Chris: I want to marry Meg!
Brian: Yep, I have got to stop drinking... Did Chris say he wanted to marry Meg?
Meg: (Wearing wedding gown) I cant marry you Chris, I'm marrying Stewey.
Stewey: Well I cant marry you Meg, I'm marrying Bob.
All: Who's Bob?
Stewey: Oh, it's a long story you see, we met at a gay bar, and we talked...Yes...We talked a lot...Then he popped the big question...Did I mention I want to become a religious singer?
Peter: I wish I was Marilyn Monroe...(Sigh, then sings) Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday to you! Happy birthday dear Mr. President! Happy birthday to you!
Stewey: OH GOD! My ears are bleeding!
Peter: (Sigh)
Marilyn Monroe's agent: Marilyn, are you okay? You looked frightened...
Marilyn Monroe: I have the strangest feeling that a fat man wants to be me... Oh, have you seen that one episode on Family Guy?
Agent: Oh, yeah! That was awseome!
Chris: When I grow up I am going to become a fashion designer! (Looks at Brian's fur) You know Brian, that color doesn't look good on you! I think you would look better with a tranquil red color.
Brian: It's my fur though...
Chris: I know just trust me!
Chris dyes Brian's fur.
Chris: Do you love it!
Brian: (Looks in mirror) I'm not sure, but I do know I have seven years of bad luck.
Lowis: I can see the future! Peter is going to say something stupid!
Peter: Eggs are good... Oh my God! Lowis you can see the future! Okay, now do you see anything with Peter and Marilyn Monroe?
Lowis: You want to marry Marilyn Monroe?
Peter: Noooo! I want to become the next Marilyn Monroe.
Brian: I don't know, look what you did to Stewey singing the happy birthday song.
Stewey: What did you say! I'm a little hard of hearing! (Stewey's ears are blue)
Peter: Guess what everyone! There are no flash backs on this show!
Brian: Lowis, fall over dead!
Lowis: But I love you Brian!
Brian: Well SOR REE!
Lowis: And I was going to let you kiss me!
Peter: Man, I need more money... Hey LOWIS! You wanna become a hooker?
Chis: Dad, can I become a stripper?
Stewey: Life is beautiful.
Peter: Hey do I have a job?
Brian: Yeah, who works on this show?
Meg: I am going to blow up the White House! (Evil Laughter)
Peter: Not if I do it first!
Both race to the White House.
Stewey: Wait! We have to stick together! The White House is a beautiful place!...Like life.
Peter and Meg: (Nod heads) Yeah, your right.
Stewey: HA! SIC! (Throws bomb at White House then runs away) VICTORY IS MINE!
Peter: Well, the Lincoln Memorial is still up for blows.
Meg: I bet I can blow it up before you!
Peter: Bring it on!
Lowis: I have seem to misplace my glasses.
Brian: You wear glasses? How come I never seen them before?
Lowis: Because their invisable.
Chris: I wonder what period pads are? (Goes in Meg's cabnet and gets one.)
Meg: What are you doing!
Chris: (Is wearing the pad on his eyes) Their sleeping masks!
Brian: Uuuuh, Stewey, youknowthat place on my back where you scratch me that makes me thump my leg?
Stewey: Yeah.
Brian: Well, can you scratch for me?
Stewey scratches Brian.
Brian: OH YEAH! OH! OH! OOOOOOOOOOOH!
Chris hears the noise coming from Stewey's room...Takes clothes off and walks in.
Chris: Is their room for a threesome?
Brian and Stewey looks at him, shocked.
Chris: Ooopsie! Sorry!
Peter: I'm going to watch the Discovery Channel!
Lowis: I'm going to watch WWF!
Meg: I'm going to watch 7thHeaven!
Chris: I'm going to watch the news!
Brian: I'm going to watch World's Funniest Animals on Animal Planet!
Stewey: I'm going to watch infomercials of asking people to give money to the hungry children and I am going to give them Meg's whole entire colledge fund! Just let me wait for the number!...There it is!
Alien from American Dad: Oops! Wrong episode! The characters just look so much alike!
Peter: (dials number) Yeah, hello? Is this Men in Black?...I'll hold.
Hi! It's over! If you want just reply! (Zoom Out)
BlueEyedFun