So this is an AU in which Cas and Dean are both girls… no, I don't know why either.

I'm not much of a writer. In fact, up until now, mine are the only eyes that have ever read anything I've written. Naturally I hate it all. If you hate it too, pretty please let me know and I will of course stop bothering you nice people with such awful arrangements of words!

Thanks

PieNuts x

I was contemplating the firmness of the grapefruit in my hands when I felt a slight vibration against my thigh. I don't know why I was trying to select the perfect fruit anyway; I very much doubted it was going to be used for conventional purposes. I decided the one I was holding was acceptable and carefully placed it in my basket. My thigh vibrated again; irritated, I reached into the pocket of my trench coat and pulled out my phone to see who dared to interrupt my grocery mission. A notification lit up the screen.

New Message: Meg.

Hey hey girls! We're hitting the club tonight, meet at mine at 9. No excuses. That me…

Sadly, I knew exactly what the end of that message said without having to open it.

"That means you, Castiel!"

Curses. I didn't want to go. Really, I didn't. But then I never wanted to go. Call me strange, but I don't get much enjoyment from standing around for hours, pretending to hear what people are saying to me over the unnecessarily loud music, while people spill their drinks on my shoes. If I'm honest I think I'd actually rather spend the night in hell. Unfortunately, after years of experience, my friends are masters in the art of guilting me in to doing things I don't want to do. So I was going whether I liked it or not.

I let out an audible sigh as I slid the phone back in my pocket and took a moment to mourn the loss of the quiet night in which I had planned. In my opinion, lying alone in bed with my laptop inches from my face was the perfect way to spend any night.

As I made my way to the checkout I paused to admire a display of washing powder which appeared to be arranged into some sort of fort. One of the good things about being 23 years old and still living at home is that my mom still does my laundry for me. Had that not been the case, the impressiveness of this display would have surely tempted me to buy some.

It happened so fast I didn't register what had actually collided with me, causing me to stumble into the washing powder fort, until I was on my back with boxes raining down upon me.

Ouch. I squinted as the blur of green eyes and brown hair hovering above me slowly came into focus. An attractive young man was looking down at me. I must have been quite a sight as the expression on his face was of both shock and pure horror.

"I am so sorry!" he said as he grabbed my hand and pulled me to my feet. "Are you okay?"

It wasn't until I was standing did I realise just how tall he was. He looked younger than me, late teen's maybe, but he was a giant of a man. I was surprised he didn't kill me! I brushed myself down and assessed the situation, was I okay? Well my ass hurt, but I still had my life and seemed to be in one piece.

"I'm fine. Sorry it was my fault; I wasn't looking." I mumbled shyly.

Being socially awkward, I didn't know what to do or say in a situation such as this, so I just picked up my basket and hurried away.

I noticed as I moved that my ass really did hurt; I was going to have an impressive bruise.

As I made my way through the parking lot I saw the boy who knocked me down standing a few cars away, he had his back to me but as he was so distinctively tall, I knew it was him.

He hid most of her from my view, all I could see was her boot, but as I got closer I overheard the girl arguing with him.

"Do you hate me, Sam? Do you actually hate me? I give you a ride. You buy me pie. That was the deal! If you forget the pie, well, I might just forget to stop the car when I let you out."

Wow. This girl was obviously very passionate about baked goods I thought to myself as I kept my head down and tried to quickly walk past unnoticed.

"Okay, okay. I'm getting the freaking pie!" He turned so suddenly that neither of us had time to prevent our second collision.

I couldn't believe it; I was on my ass yet again. Yes, I was definitely going to have a bruise. I looked up to see my grapefruit rolling across the parking lot. My groceries had scattered themselves all over the place when my bag split during the fall. Fantastic. Now I was going to have to carry everything in my arms while I walked home. I found myself suddenly in a bad mood; this evening was shaping up to be an unenjoyable one.

I tried to stop the words as they came out of my mouth but it was too late.

"Do you hate me too, Sam?" I snapped.

I instantly regretted it. Why did I say that? When it came to strangers, I was a do-not-speak-unless-spoken-to kind of girl. Even then I certainly wouldn't say anything confrontational or something that would give away that I'd been eavesdropping! What an idiot.

I tried to apologise but before I could open my mouth, the boy who I now knew to be called Sam, beat me to it.

"GOD NO!" He practically shouted at me. "I don't hate you. I'm so so sorry!"

Before I had a chance to protest, he grabbed me and yanked me to my feet. He left his hands on the sides of my arms as he began looking me over intently as though he was searching for a broken part. Once he was satisfied all my limbs were still attached, it looked for moment like he was going to pull me in for a hug. My unapproachable nature must have made him change his mind though because instead he released me and quickly started gathering my stuff, in what appeared to be a state of panic.

He thrust the items into my arms and then picked up the small box by my foot. He froze as he noticed what he was holding, his face turned red, as did mine.

"gaah…urm…ah." I didn't know what he meant by that, but his face grew even redder.

It was like time had slowed down as the painful silence encased us.

He tried to speak again but only more incomprehensible sounds came out.

Luckily, the box was snatched out of his hands relieving the horribly awkward tension that had built up between us. The girl Sam was arguing with had appeared next to us, grapefruit in hand.

"Sammy. Pie. Go." She motioned with her head to the direction of the store.

Sam moved so fast he practically vanished before my eyes.

"Sorry again!" he shouted. I looked over my shoulder to see him already half way across the lot.

The girl in front of me was undeniably attractive. In fact, she was probably the most beautiful girl I'd ever seen in real life, though it was an effortless beauty. She had her light brown hair tied up in a messy ponytail and wore jeans, a simple t-shirt and a leather jacket with the sleeves rolled up to her elbows. I noticed she was around the same size as me, same height too, but she had boobs whereas I've always had more of a boyish figure. Immediately I was jealous.

"Sorry about my MOOSE OF A BROTHER." she said, turning to look at Sam as she shouted the last part loud enough for him to hear.

She gave a small cough and suddenly I was pulled out of the trance that I hadn't realised I was in. Oh no. I'd been staring. I looked away quickly and felt the familiar burning in my cheeks. The trouble with having skin as pale as mine is that when I'm embarrassed, my stupid face lets everybody know about it.

I glanced back at her and she was smiling at me; my embarrassment obviously amused her.

She looked down at the grapefruit and box of tampons she held in her hands and then at the items I was struggling to hold. For some reason I quickly became very ashamed by my purchases. I had no reason to be, I just didn't want her to judge me. I uselessly shifted my arms in an attempt to hide the bottle of wine, superglue, lollipops and 2 boxes of washing powder that I was holding. I hadn't intended to buy the washing powder; they must have fallen in my basket when I destroyed the fort. I didn't notice until I got to the checkout though and at that point I couldn't exactly say I didn't want them, so I had to buy them. At least they were on special offer.

She raised her eyebrow and smiled. "Looks like someone's planning one hell of a party."

"I... it's… they're for…" Great. Now I was stuttering and had no idea how to justify my need of what now felt like such a bizarre collection of things. Thankfully, she saved me from having to finish that sentence.

"Hey, do you need a ride?" She asked gesturing back to her car. I'm no car expert, but this was a nice car. It was black and I could tell it was some sort of classic so it had to be old, but it was so shiny it looked like it could have been brand new. It was obviously well loved.

"No." I blurted out. I was aware of how rude I sounded; I hate that I'm often too shy to be polite.

"I… No. Thank you. I'm not far." I added. This girl was nice, she probably already thought I was weird, I didn't want her thinking I'm rude too.

"You sure? It's no trouble."

"Really, I'm fine. But thank you." I glanced at her and smiled before quickly looking away, not wanting to make eye contact.

I suddenly became very aware that this stranger was still holding my tampons. I mean, she's a girl so it's not like she's never seen a box of tampons before, but still, it was an uncomfortable situation. Not as uncomfortable as it had been when Sam had them, but uncomfortable none the less.

She looked at me curiously.

"Well ok, but at least let me give you this." She walked over to her, pulled out a grocery bag and emptied its contents onto the back seat. She then placed the grapefruit and tampons in the bag before walking back to me, taking the items from my arms and dropping them in too.

She handed me the bag and took a step back.

"There. Good as new." She decided with another smile.

"Thanks." I didn't know what to do now. This was one of those times when I really wished I knew how to talk to people; I would have liked to have contributed something to the conversation. Instead I just stood there looking at her. I think she could sense my awkwardness.

I decided I needed to get away before I gave myself the chance to make a complete idiot of myself.

"Thank you." I repeated and started to walk away.

"Take it easy." She said and gave me a little wave.

I tried to wave back but I was holding the bag in both hands and gave her more of a hand flick as I fumbled trying not to drop everything again.

"Castiel, you are a moron." I said to myself as reached the end of the parking lot and began to make my way home.

It took me 30 minutes to walk home and the whole time I kept replaying in my head the encounter I'd just had with that girl. Each time I played it out I'd replace what I actually said with something I would have liked to have said, had I been capable of normal human interaction. I imagined the different outcomes and each time it ended with me agreeing to that ride home. If I had agreed, my arms certainly wouldn't be hating me right now, that's for sure. Wine and grapefruit get exceptionally heavy after half an hour.

"I'm home." I shouted as I stepped through the door. I'd barely closed it behind me when Gabriel had the bag off me and began searching through it.

"Did you get the goods?" He asked urgently.

"Eurgh." He said as he took out the tampons and flung them on the floor. Seriously? How many people were going to touch them today?

"Yes I got them, why do you need super glue and a grapefruit so badly anyway?" I asked.

He lifted out the grapefruit slowly and carefully like it was the holy grail or something. He held it up to his nose and inhaled deeply.

"Mmm. Ripe." He whispered. Then he looked to me and grinned.

"You know what, I don't even want to know, do I?" I loved my younger brother but he had a vivid imagination and a warped sense of humour. It was a deadly mix and not something you wanted to be on the receiving end of.

"Not likely." He said matter of factly as he ripped open a lolly and shoved it in his mouth. "Thanks though, I owe you."

"Is Balthazar home?" I asked.

"What do I look like, they guy that keeps track of the whereabouts of pompous douchebags? I have my own life to live!"

I sighed and rolled my eyes at him.

"Well ok, on this particular occasion I happen to know he's in his room. You got lucky!" He glared at me.

"You're an unusual human being, Gabe." I laughed.

"Who says I'm human?" He smirked and with that he took his grapefruit and superglue and galloped up the stairs. I shook my head, the kid was definitely special.

I took the wine upstairs and knocked on Balthazar's bedroom door.

"Come in." He called.

I opened the door and stepped inside.

"I got your wine." I said wiggling it at him.

"You, my dear sister, are an angel." He kissed me on the head as he took the bottle from me. I tried to hold back a giggle, I still couldn't get used to the accent he'd picked up while living in England for the last four years.

"I know." I grinned, putting on my best angelic face. I was enjoying having my older brother home again, although I would have preferred it to be under better circumstances.

"Are you seeing her again tonight?" I asked.

"I am." He replied, watching me as I failed to hide my displeasure. Bela was back in town, claiming she wants to give their marriage another go. I had never liked my sister in law and not just because she stole my big brother and left the country, I just didn't trust her. As it turns out, I was right not to trust her, a month ago Balthazar found her in their bed with another man. He flew back home to get away from her and clear his head.

He bent his knees, to lower himself to my eye level. "Look Castiel, I know you've never been her number one fan, but if there's a chance my marriage can be saved, then I have to try. Please don't make this any harder for me."

"No. You're right. It's none of my business anyway. I just want you to be happy." I said truthfully.

He pulled me into a tight hug. "You're awesome, Castiel."

He released me and turned away. "Now if you'll excuse me, I need to take a shower."

"Yeah, you stink!" I joked, which resulted in him throwing his pillow at me before making his way to the bathroom.

I dropped down on my bed and groaned. I was going to have to start getting ready to go out soon. I never bother trying to make myself look pretty when I go out, no one even notices me when I'm with my friends anyway. Not that I mind, in fact I'm glad, I couldn't stand all the male attention they get. These days I just run a comb through my messy hair and if I'm feeling fancy, I slap a bit of mascara on but that's about it.

I'd already decided I was going to wear my favourite dress, it was white and simple and loose fitting. I nearly always wore it when they made me go out, but I didn't care. It was comfortable.

Ah crap. The realisation hit me. My period was going to be making an appearance anytime now. I guess I'd be wearing my black skinny jeans instead.

I hate being a girl.