Never Touch the IPod
Disclaimer: I do not own Black Lagoon or any of the songs or bands (Black Label Society for Life!)
It was a cold summer day. One Rock wish would just end. He was sitting in Lagoon Company's car and was eating an orange. The juice spilled a little down his chin but Rock wiped it away quickly. He was waiting for Revy. She had gone to drop off a package to the Rip Off Church and had been gone for some time.
Rock began to think something was wrong and was about to check on Revy. Then he rationalized that if something did go wrong he would have heard gunfire by this point. Letting out a small grated sigh Rock wished that Revy would come back soon. It was too boring just sitting here. Rock tried to entertain himself and began to rummage through the dash board. He didn't think he would find anything. Rock just wanted to keep his mind off the wait.
Moving the paperwork for the Pontiac GTO Rock frowned. There was literally nothing to do! Placing everything back Rock was just about to close the dash when he spotted something, an IPod. Picking it up Rock looked it over and could tell it was Revy's. Blood was encrusted around the edges and Revy's name was crudely engraved near the bottom.
Rock guessed that it was nothing but heavy metal and scream-o so he placed the IPod back. It wasn't that Rock didn't like metal but he just liked his "Rock" a little less hardcore than Revy. Still, at this point he was willing to do anything to make the time pass by. Rock forcefully put in the ear bud, pumped the volume to max and pressed play. There was a silence and then it began.
Rock's ears were assaulted with a full blast of Rob Zombie's Living Dead Girl. He had heard the song before but never really paid attention to it. Slowly Rock began rocking his head back and forth. Soon he was banging his head back and forth until the song reached its end. Rock took in a small breath and grinned. He was officially a "head banger."
Pressing the forward button a couple times Rock stopped on another band he had heard of before, The Black Label Society. The song read, "Concrete Jungle." The riffs were awesome and the lyrics were, in Revy's words "Kick ass." Rock stuck out his tongue while he tried and failed at making an air guitar. As the song reached his peak Rock just shook his head and was thankful no one was in the car to see this. Damn I'm bored, hurry up Revy! Rock thought to himself while he flipped through the songs some more. Bored with the metal he looked through her playlists and found one titled "Rocky." Weird, that's her nickname for me. Rock thought to himself before clicking play on the playlist.
Then there was silence again. Rock looked down but there was no artist or song information. All it said was "artist." Rock frowned but thought ah whatever, I'll give it a shot. The song took a little to start. It wasn't what Rock was expecting. It was Taylor Swift... Taylor Swift! Her hit single, "You Belong With Me" burst through the speakers into Rock's ears. He cracked a smile and then he let out a suppressed chuckle. This was too good to be true! Turning to the next song Rock burst out into tears with laughter. The next song was "Every Time We Touch" by Cascada.
Revy dropped off the package and was heading back to the GTO. Just as Revy was going to reach the car she spotted Eda.
"Hey Rebecca!" Eda called out sarcastically. Revy just growled and tried to ignore her but the blonde nun was hot on her heels.
"You're not with Rock today, that's strange." Eda remarked, much to Revy's annoyance. She just narrowed her eyes and growled.
"He's waiting out front in the car." Eda just casually smiled and remarked.
"That's a shame I wanted to see him today." Revy just rolled her eyes. She would have told Eda to back off but she just wanted to go back to the car. Eda didn't take the hint and continued following Revy.
"You know I think Rock likes blondes. I mean, if I was Rock and I was around you I would have made a move by now, but he hasn't. Maybe you scare him." Revy's eye twitched. Her minimal patience just ran out.
"Rock is just a…" She couldn't finish her sentence the look on Eda's face was priceless. Revy turned to see what had made Eda look so pale. As they talked they had made it to the GTO. Rock was banging his head back and forth, throwing up the rock on sign and trying to make an air guitar. That's when she noticed, he was listening to her IPod!
"Rock is just a fucking dead man." Revy said coldly as her hands wrapped around her cutlasses. Eda held her back and smiled devilishly.
"Come on, let's watch this. I mean have you ever seen him do something like this!" Eda protested. Revy just forced herself away from Eda, with a death glare in her eye. Sneaking up in the car, Revy let herself into the back. Rock didn't even notice.
Rock listened through three more songs before taking off the ear buds. After flipping through the "Rocky" playlist he switched back to metal. It was too weird. He let himself laugh again thinking about it and said aloud sarcastically.
"Girly music." Almost as soon as Rock said that he felt the cold barrel of a pistol digging into his skull. Revy placed a single hand onto Rock's shoulder and pulled him in close
"If you ever fucking tell anyone I will fucking castrate you… slowly. Understand dipshit?" Rock's eyes went wide as Revy crawled over from the back to the driver's seat. The gun still firmly aimed at his head.
"Perfectly" Rock muttered. Revy pulled her cutlass away and began to drive. As they hit the road, Rock couldn't help but ask.
"Was that playlist named after…" Revy slammed on the brakes. Rock's forehead smashed into the dash of the car. Revy dug her hands into the back of Rock's hair and yanked until they were eye level and hissed.
"How many times do you think that will take to cause amnesia?"
"Who are you?" Rock asked timidly. Revy turned her eyes back to the road and growled.
"Good answer, Rock. Now, Never touch my IPod again." Rock just tilted his head to one side and stated quietly.
"No seriously, who are you? Where am I?" Revy snarled and slammed Rock's head into the dash.
"Joke Revy…Joke." Rock moaned before sitting up straight. Revy didn't answer. She just slammed his head into the dash again.
"Please stop… I belong with you, right!" Rock cried.
"Son of a Bitch!" The entire ride home Rock couldn't help but sing the Taylor Swift lyrics to Revy.