This fanfic is dedicated to the lovely SaviorLovesRandomChiz

'Q9 - Is there such thing as a four/ten romantic fluff story?

Da Xiang/Toby fanfic? No and there will never be!'

BECAUSE I ROLL LIKE THAT BABAH o3o

One day DaXiang was sitting in his room in Beylin Temple.

He was sitting in his room reading Great Expectations by Charles Dickens.

'A cultured mind is the key to Beyline Temple's 4000 Year Old Legacy,' is what he was thinking.

There was a soft tap on his door and Chi Yun crept in looking more than a little perturbed.

'Da Xiang?' He asked warily.

'Yes?'

'There are weird noises coming from Chao Xin's room and I'm too afraid to go in there and get him to shut up.' Chi Yun said.

'Just ignore him. Go for a walk or something.' Da Xiang told him, going back to his book.

However, a few minutes later DaXiang could also hear these 'disturbing noises' coming from Chao's room, which was incidentally two doors down from his.

He sighed, got up and walked down the hallway.

'CHAO WILL YOU BE QUIET I AM TRYING TO READ DICKENS!' He shouted, rapping on his door.

But Chao was just louder to piss him off.

Later that day, Chao strolled shirtlessly outside to find DaXiang sulking by himself on the steps, still reading his book.

'I am so good she named my dick Schlongzilla. I bet you could hear me in Hong Kong!'

DaXiang just kept reading his book, muttering darkly to himself.

'Well? Touch me, bro!' Chao said, offering a fist bump.

'I WOULD NOT TOUCH YOU IF OUR FOUR THOUSAND YEAR OLD LEGACY DEPENDED ON IT!' DaXiang yelled, storming back inside.

The next day, DaXiang found himself led by Mei Mei into a room where ChaoXin and Chi Yun assembled.

'Before this starts Chi Yun would just like to say that Chi Yun has nothing to do with it!' Chi Yun said hurriedly. 'It's just Chao put Lacerta on a really high shelf and says he won't give it back until we have this meeting.'

Chao put his arms on DaXiang's shoulders and began to talk.

'DaXiang. DaXiang, DaXiang, DaXiang...'

DaXiang growled. 'The hell do you want you mad bastard?'

'DaXiang all of us agree you need to get laid. Badly.'

'WHAT?!'

'It's really no big deal. You're a good looking cat and I know you're a virgin and shit. It won't be that difficult. Trust me. We're taking a trip to America 'cause bitches go crazy for celebrities like us over there.

And that is how Chao made it Team Wang Hu Zhong's mission to find DaXiang a girlfriend. Or someone to have sex with.

Meanwhile, in NewYork, Team Starbreaker were having another meeting.

'I HAVE HAD IT! I JUST DON'T FEEL AS IF MY THOUGHTS AND FEELINGS ARE RESPECTED! ARE YOU LISTENING JACK? DAMIAN, TAKE OUT THOSE HEADPHONES, I AM TRYING TO REACH YOU!' Toby's eyes nearly filled with tears as he tried to voice his concerns.

'Calm down, man.' Masamune said, checking his watch and cursing that Two and a Half Men would be on soon.

'I CAN'T HELP IT ZEO! I AM ALWAYS ON MY BEST BEHAVIOR WITH EVERYONE AND THOSE TWO RESPOND BY TAKING THE PISS!'

'WHAT DID THEY DO NOW?' Zeo growled.

'DAMIAN KEEPS MESSING UP MY CDS. THEY'RE NOT EVEN KIND OF IN ALPHABETICAL ORDER ANYMORE. AND JACK CUT UP MY FAVOURITE PHOTO I HAVE OF US!'

'FOR SCRAPBOOKING! I WAS MAKING A SCRAPBOOK, SOMETHING THAT WE COULD ALL ENJOY!' Jack protested.

'I MEAN I WOULDN'T MIND BUT THEY NEVER EVEN ASK! THIS IS THE LAST STRAW! DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW LONG IT TOOK TO REAARANGE THOSE CDS?'

'Dude, you have like twenty CDs...' Masamune reminded him.

'NOT ANYMORE! SOMEHOW HALF OF THEM HAD DISAPPEARED AND THE ONES LEFT HAVE WERE ALL IN THE WRONG CASES!'

'Alright, Jesus, I stole you CDs, calm down!' Damian said.

'WELL OBVIOUSLY THERE IS NO MUSIC FAIRY TAKING THEM! COME ON GUYS, I TRY MY BEST BUT YOU ARE NOT HELPING! I HAVE HAD IT!' Toby shouted, storming out.

'What a little bitch.' Jack scoffed.

'Dude, it's not his fault he doesn't wank enough.' Zeo said.

'Doesn't give him the excuse to act like a prissy little bitch.'

Along the streets of New York...

'I feel like no one understands me...' Toby sighed, walking along.

'I feel like no one understands me...' DaXiang sighed, walking along.

Suddenly, Toby looked up and saw a tall, muscular Chinese man with long, shaggy hair standing in front of him.

Suddenly, DaXiang looked up and saw a slim boy with choppy white bangs standing in front of him.

They both just stood there, looking into each others eyes.

The next few days with Wang Hu Zhong

'I AM IN LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOVE, LOOOOVEE~'

'JESUS SHUT THE FUCK UP DAXIANG WE GET IT ALREADY!' Mei yelled, fed up of this behavior. Honestly, he was worse than ChaoXin!

'So? How's the tail? What did I tell you?' Chao asked with a grin.

'OH PLEASE CHAO, I WANT NOTHING TO DO WITH TOBY SEXUALLY OUR CONNECTION IS FAR TO DEEP FOR THAT!' Da Xiang smiled eyes, lighting up.

'Oh please, you want to bang the fuck out of him, don't you? You want to shove it right up there! You want to unleash Pennis the Mennis all over that boy!' Chao continued to get more and more graphic.

'CHAO PLEASE! DO NOT BE SO CRUDE!' DaXiang cried, leaving the room in a rage.

With the two love birds...

'OH, DAXIANG!' Toby cried, falling into his arms.

'OH, TOBY!' DaXiang cried, holding the smaller boy in his arms.

'YOU'RE EVERYTHING I'VE EVER HOPED FOR! YOU'RE SO INTELLIGENT, SENSITIVE AND SPECIAL!'

'YOU'RE A GOD SEND! YOU'RE HEAVEN ON EARTH! THE WHOLE WORLD STARES WHEN YOU SMILE!'

DaXiang reached up to gently brush Toby's feathery fringe from his forehead, his lips brushing him gently. His kisses began to get lower, drifting from his nose to his mouth then pulling him into an intense and passionate kiss. Toby kissed him back, just as voraciously.

they dated for three months then broke up 'cause da shizzle is a commie yo and has a tiny dick.

Who else is willing to bet DaXiang calls his dick 'Third Arm of Justice'?

On the bright side, I spent my Halloween at the vets, getting my cat debollikated.

Tsubasa now has no balls.

'Shirtlessly' is now a word.