A hundred hearts would be too few
Puck will tell him later that his vaunted leadership skills disappeared in a puff of smoke the moment the first shots rang out and that he and Mike had to sit on him before heaving him out of the opened ground-floor window to escape, or he would've gone screaming through McKinley's hallways to Kurt's classroom.
All Finn remembers is nauseating fear, the conviction that Kurt is dead and the blind need to be with him.
Mike and Puck drag him over the grass to the evacuation point at the farthest end of the parking lot where other students from their grade have already gathered, milling around and shouting in their cell phones.
Kurt is not here.
Finn's paralyzed, struck dumb for minutes. He hears Mike panting beside him, little sobs in his throat and when he glances at Puck, he's horrified to see tears on his face.
There are sirens in the distance, coming closer.
More shots are fired, windows break, kids scream.
He finds himself pressed to the ground once more with Puck and Mike on top of him again, stopping him from rushing back into the school building. He sobs and calls for Kurt; Puck tries to calm him, his voice sharp with panic.
He feels as if he's bleeding inside and he doesn't understand, Kurt and him have only been brothers for a year or so but Kurt's become a part of him as if he had a piece missing his whole life and Kurt just perfectly slotted in that place.
He can't lose Kurt, he can't even see a future without him, it'd be like living with half of himself cut away.
Suddenly, Sam's there. Sam who is in the same class as Kurt. He is so very pale even his lips are white and he's saying something about Kurt that makes Puck pull him up from the ground and over towards the street where a bunch of freshmen are clustered around Kurt like baby ducks.
Kurt who is beautifully, magnificently alive and unhurt.
Finn feels a jolt deep under his ribs when Kurt looks up wide-eyed and their gazes lock. He sobs Kurt's name once and stumbles towards him.
He engulfs his brother, pulls him in close and curls his large body around Kurt's thin frame. They're pressed together, arms wrapped tight around each other, both shaking with terror and relief. He's crying all over Kurt's hair and hopes his brother won't mind the snot shampoo too much later on.
Kurt shudders and keens softly, face hidden in his shoulder, forehead pressed against Finn's cheek, tears leaking down his neck and Finn arms tighten around him.
Everything around them has fallen away, there's only Kurt and him left, breathing each other's air, hearts beating in harmony and this…oh…this is what Coach Sylvester meant. This is his connection and it's deeper and different from the love he feels for Rachel and not the least bit sexual but so damn right.
Kurt grows heavier in his arms so he slides down, sits down and pulls his brother in his lap. They're still holding on to each other like drowning men, heads close together, oblivious to the chaos around them.
He feels Puck crouch next to him and beams a watery smile at his friend. Puck's expression goes soft and strangely awed and he stretches a trembling hand towards them. He knows how much Puck has come to care for Kurt, so he untangles his hand from Kurt's hair, wraps it around Puck's neck and pulls him close in their embrace.
They're huddled together, arms and legs entwined and draw strength from each other. Finn's never felt so complete.