"My head hurts, Sam."
Sam sat at his desk, his jaw placed firmly on it. The phone started to ring. He didn't bother to move to grab it; there wasn't much of a need anymore.
"Sam? Sam, don't ignore me."
Sam stayed quiet and still.
"Sam! Hell-ooooo?! Answer me!"
The 6-foot-tall dog stood sluggishly and went to the fridge, pulling it open slowly. Not much inside... Nothing edible, at least.
"Dammit, Sam! You're tickin' me off, ya bone-head!"
Sam sighed and looked up at the ceiling. He'd be safe, so long as he hadn't forgotten anything.
"SAAAAAM!"
Sam nearly jumped out of his fur when he heard the roar and pounding on the window near him. His 'little buddy' had latched himself to the window frame, and was pounding against the glass with all of his might. His white fur was not-so-soft looking - all mussed up - and the bags under his beady brown eyes only added to the insane glare he gave.
"Open the window, Sam." The lagomorph grinned his typical, over-exaggerated shark-toothed grin.
"I'm afraid I can't, little buddy."
"Aww, come on, why the hell not?! I've been alone out here all night! At least, I think it was all night. I can't remember. Hee hee!"
"Max, I can't let you inside."
The rabbit almost looked hurt. "Why not?"
"I'm going to call the police if you don't get away from this house."
"But this is our house, Sam! Our house! I live with you, don't you remember?"
"Don't make me call them after you again, little buddy..."
Max didn't know what Sam was talking about. Still, he felt compelled to reply with "You do that, they die, Sam. Every last one of 'em - dead."
Max wasn't one to fight against whatever he felt compelled to do.
"Don't you think you've hurt enough people, Max? Just turn yourself in to the police. Maybe, being as psychotic and delusional as you are, you can escape from them after that. But never come back here, do you hear me?"
"Geez, Max - I mean, Sam. When did you become so touchy? So maybe I bit that girl a couple times. She had it coming!"
"'That girl' was the Geek, Max! You put her in the hospital!"
"So wha~t? She was pestering me, Sam! You know I hate it when people pester me!"
"But that doesn't give you a reason to hurt them, little buddy."
"Oh shut up already and open this damned window before I strangle you with your crappy banjo!"
"No, Max. Go away!" Sam pointed his gun at the window, startling Max a little.
"You wouldn't shoot me, would ya, Sam? We're best buddies! Hell, we're the Freelance Police!"
"We're not either anymore, Max. Now go. Go away before I'm forced to shoot you and plead self-defense."
Max went uncharacteristically quiet. He had on this sort of frown that Sam had seen only a few times in the long, long time that they'd known each other.
"Go!" Sam barked at his old friend.
Max blinked a few times rapidly. He hesitantly let go of the window frame and fell a few feet to the ground below. He swallowed as he sat there, feeling a bit numb.
Sam slowly lowered his gun.
"I hope I'm doing the right thing..." He mumbled to himself. He felt horrible, but Max had gone too far after their latest case. Both of them ended up getting into a huge mess with the other departments of the police force, as well as the commissioner.
Sam had managed to get out of the situation with only a banning from doing any freelance police work, but Max was facing charges of manslaughter, and was probably even supposed to be on death row at this time. Of course, with Max having such short-term memory and all, the rabbit had probably escaped and easily forgotten nearly everything that he'd done and had reverted back to what Sam had grown used to calling 'default'.
Sam put his gun away and was about to go back to his desk and sit down when he suddenly heard a sound he was confused by.
'Is... Is that...? No, that's impossible. I've never seen Max cry, ever. He'd never cry over something like this.'
Outside, sitting on the ground, Max tilted his head up and cried. He wasn't sure that he'd ever felt the way he did then, and he was slightly more certain that he'd never cried like this... at least, never in Sam's general radius.
If Sam were joking, Max knew that this would cause his pal to open the window, let him inside, and maybe snuggle him a little.
If not, Max was alone. Completely and utterly alone.
Max leaped back up onto the windowsill.
Sam stared at Max with this look of pity on his face. 'Wow, he's actually crying... That's a sight.'
"Sam, what did I do?! I don't remember, and frankly, I only care because you seem hurt, and I hate to see you hurt."
Sam looked at the floor. He couldn't just force Max to leave - where would he go? What would that leave Sam with? An empty void in his heart, probably.
Max grinned as Sam opened the window. "Sa~m!" He sung tearfully and cheerfully as he leaped into the dog's arms and hugged him.
Sam hushed the hyper lagomorph, subconsciously patting his large, fluffy head. "You've gotta stay quiet, alright, little buddy? No one must know that I let you keep staying here, or else we could both get into big trouble."
"I understand, Sam."
"You do?"
"... No. But if pretending to understand lets me stay here with you, then I'll pretend more than I ever have before."
"That's sweet... I'm sorry I made you cry, Max."
"Are we still best buddies?"
Sam hesitated. Max had done horrible things, some using his psychic powers, but all-in-all, it was clear that he had never deliberately tried to hurt Sam himself...
"... I guess so. Yes, we're still best buddies."
Max's insanely-wide grin spread even wider, and he tightened his grip on his best friend. "Oh, Sam!"
"You worry me sometimes, little buddy."
"I know, Sam."
Sam was asleep in the top bunk of his and Max's bunk bed. However, he was almost literally sleeping with one eye open. It would be difficult to fully trust Max again, he knew that much.
Max's eyes practically snapped open. He looked around, keeping everything from his nose-down underneath the covers. He'd heard a noise.
"... S-S-Sam...?"
Sam rolled over onto his other side so he could look down at the rabbit. "Yeah, Max?"
"Did you hear that noise?"
"What noise? All I heard was you call for me."
Max looked away. "Guess it must have been nothing. Either that or the giant mutant cockroaches have dug their way back into the cellar."
"Go back to sleep, little buddy."
"Okay, Sam..." Max tried to fall back asleep, but whenever he was close, that noise would awake him again. It was as if something was deliberately trying to keep him and only him awake, and it was starting to piss him off.
The hyperkinetic rabbity thing quietly jumped out of the bottom bunk and walked out of the room, trying to follow the sound.
Sam couldn't go back to sleep no matter how hard he tried after being woken up. He let out a sigh as he sat up.
"Max, tell you what. I'll help you try to find that... noise?" He was surprised to see Max wasn't in bed. He got out of bed and tried to look for him. "Little buddy, where'd you go?" he called out.
Max heard him, but didn't reply. He kept looking around the house quietly, but the noise didn't happen again - it was as if it only happened whenever he was trying to fall asleep.
"There you are, Max! You had me worried you went bonkers again and ran off." Sam said as he laid on hand on his rabbit friend's shoulder.
Max jumped a bit, but then pointed at the front door, his grin returning to his face as he looked at Sam. "Sam, the noise is coming from outside. I think."
"Well then, let's go see what the noise was so we can get some sleep." the dog smiled back and opened the door.
"No, Sam!" Max slammed the door shut and pressed his back against it. "What if it's an alien from Mars? What if it wants to enslave us? What if it wants us to treat it like a proper guest?!"
"Then we just do what we usually do, Max."
Max pulled his Luger out of nowhere. "Shoot it in the eyes and eat its insides?"
Sam looked at his friend with a disturbed look. "No, we capture the alien and sell it to scientists. Geez, Max, I swear you're getting more demented."
"Oboy, am I, really?" Max seemed pleased by the thought, which was somewhat typical of him.
"Yeah, but if you still wanna shoot it, you can after we find out what it is."
"You're the best, Sam! Now let's get out there and ruin that thing's day." Max ripped the door open and rushed outside, looking around with his gun out. "Show yourself, you damned dirty ape!"
Sam ran out as well with his gun in his hands, carefully looking around.
"My God, Sam, look! I was right! It's a freakishly deformed alien being from another planet!" Max pointed feverishly over to a walking ball of red slime.
"Hello, Sam and Max." The alien held out one hand to shake with Sam, and another in front of Max to be shook.
Max simply stared at the hand, as it was in front of his mouth. "..." He seemed to be contemplating on whether or not to bite this 'foreign object'.
"Max, no biting the alien. Shake its hand."
Slowly, Max extended his tongue. "He tastes like jelly, Sam."
The alien pulled its hand away from Max. "Freelance Police, some other members of my race and I have crash landed on your planet, and we were captured by these odd creatures in helmets. I was the only one who escaped from their barbaric experiments. We need your help."
"Can I shoot him now, Max? I mean, Sam." Max asked, not at all sympathetic or interested in the alien's plea.
"Wait a minute, Max. What's in it for us if we help you?" Sam asked the alien.
"What is it that you want? We'll give you anything you want if you save us."
"Anything?" Max asked excitedly.
"Anything, huh?"
"Yes, but we must hurry. Follow me." The alien started sliding away.
Max suddenly looked like something had angered him as he held his Luger a little tighter, clenching his hands into fists.
Sam looked at his friend. "Max? You okay, little buddy?"
Max feigned a smile, though he still looked noticeably irked. "Yeah, Sam. I'm fine. Let's follow the alien and get this over with." As the rabbit started to walk, he placed his finger on the trigger, as if getting ready to shoot.
Sam looked worried for his friend as he followed.
As they walked, Max suddenly leaped in front of the alien and aimed his gun at him. "Hands up, you lying pile of jam!"
The alien, stunned, stopped walking and held his hands up.
"On your knees!" Max demanded harshly. "Get down, and don't try anything funny!"
"Max, what are you doing?" Sam asked as he got in front of Max.
Max lowered the gun, not wanting to shoot Sam. "I'm prosecuting him for how he's playing with us like we're fools, Sam." He replied casually.
"How can you tell he's lying, Max?"
Max shrugged. "I guess my latent psychic powers are back again. He thought about how much he was going to get paid if he brought me to a military base so they could use me as a weapon. Right now, he's worrying that he's been called out for his bluffs. He's not really an alien, Sam. He's just some fat guy covered in strawberry jelly."
Sam frowned as he looked at the "alien" and shot a nearby fire hydrant; sending water flying at him.
They watched as nothing happened; the alien simply sputtered.
Max had a finger on his lips, as if somewhat intrigued. "Huh. Must be some powerful jam."
"Or he could really be an alien and I just soaked him." Sam grumbled.
"Please! Your rabbit friend - he lies!"
"Shut your mouth, tubby, before I have to shut it for you." Max aimed around Sam at the alien.
"You shut it, Max. I've had it with your antics. We're doing this and then you and I are through!"
Max fell silent again. He put on a blank expression as he slowly put his Luger away to wherever he hid his things.
Sam helped the alien up. "Sorry about that. Now where do we have to go?"
"I stole a vehicle, so we should get to that to get to our destination faster. Then we go to where the creatures in helmets took the rest of my crew."
"Alright. Show the way."
The alien started to walk, but Max didn't move. He just stood there staring at the sidewalk, rubbing his right arm a little.
Sam stopped and looked back at Max. "Let's go, Max."
Max looked up at him for a moment, a hurt look in his spaced-apart brown eyes, then he averted his eyes again and slowly walked to Sam's side.
Sam's ears drooped a bit as they walked; now regretting telling Max they were through.