A/N Don't own this either. Again, I thank Garretelliot for doing the nice little editing that makes it look pretty and not like itcame directly out of an email. :) Enjoy it! My souvenir to all of you from nerd camp.
Good things come to those who wait. At least, that's what I keep telling myself. If I wait long enough, I'll eventually have her. Took the Sox eighty-six years to win the series, after all. I've watched them for almost fifty years and they finally won. If it took them that long to win, I can wait out my own curse. I'll pull through soon enough. The two of them are happy enough together, but he's only part of what she needs.
She needs someone stable, and that's what he is, but she also needs someone who'll take her as she is, warts and all. And well, he wants her to be what he wants her to be, he wants her to be this perfect counterpart to his own life. And she's not. He wants her missing the one thing that makes her, well, her, and that's her faults, her quirks.
He wants her to forget her past, move on and act like half of it never happened, that she's who she is now. And while that's admirable, it's not who she is. Jordan without her past is nothing, I just wish she'd learn to cope with it and accept that she can't change it. She doesn't let go, but she does cope, and that's what's the important thing.
He's in love with what he wants her to be. He's in love with this wonderful ideal of her, what he thinks she can be. And I know that she can be that person, but I'll take her as she is now. She's not broken,
or flawed, not like he thinks she is. He thinks that the way she reacts is a bad thing, it's insanely frustrating at times, but it is who she is.
And she'll realize that. It's the one thing that's driven her apart from all her other boyfriends. They wanted her to change, and she won't change. She is who she is, the wild, passionate, devil-may-care
woman who laughs in the face of danger. She throws caution to the wind, and goes off in search of the truth no matter what. At least she'd like to be.
But she's not that person, I've known her for a decade, and from the minute I met her I knew that all of that was a mere facade. She's got issues, and we all do. I wish she'd stop running from her problems,
but I can't tell her for a minute to forget all about them and act like nothing ever happened. That's not who she is. She just needs to deal enough to be happy.
Her problems make up so much of who she is, and he doesn't want that from her, he wants her to be perfect, be who she appears to be, and not care about what she is. He wants what he wants, not what he gets. I don't care, I've seen her good and her bad, and everything in between and I love her, I loved her from the minute that I first saw her, and that's not going to change.
They act like they're happy, and I'm sure that they are, I'm sure that the two of them are perfectly in love right now. But that won't last forever, she's fallen out of love more times than I can count. It's
just like all of her other relationships, fall in, fall out, and I'm the one there to pick up the pieces for her. They are going to be at each other's throats soon enough, if not a few months, a few years. And after a decade, what's a few more years?
I've waited my whole life to see the Sox win, I can wait for her. At least I keep telling myself that. I can wait another few years to beat my own curse, after all, I am a patient man.