A/N: There we go. That wasn't too bad, was it? Hiatus wasn't too hard on you, right? I mean, it was the same week off we usually do in between these updates. But, if you're new here, hi! Welcome, welcome! My name is Lumi and I'm your new best pal. At least I hope so. If you're not familiar with the way I run my Ouran fic, it's a reader fic with our dear friend Lana here. Lana? Care to chime in?

Hi, guys! I missed you, too! And uh, if you don't know how I came to be other than the obvious wink, wink, cuddle, cuddle, kind of way, go back and read Kiss, Kiss. If you don't, you're going to be really lost. I got nothing else. Lumi? What about you?

I don't really have much else to say. Other than the fact that, again, if you're new here, I should probably give you the predisposition triggers. There aren't any in this chapter, but because our dear, sweet Lana has some psychological problems, she's had some…unhealthy ways of managing in the past. And this fic was initially designed to be a hug for those of us who have had the same problems rolling around in our noggin. Because the first one was so well received and I had an OVERWHELMING response to write a sequel, here we are. This isn't just your weekly hug. It's my place to vent, too. Writing about mental illness is a little touchy because you all know the last thing I want to do is make you go somewhere dark (also, all of it stems from a place of personal experience. Just a side note.). *still feels guilty about a chapter she posted back in August (returning fans know what one I'm talking about)* I'll make sure there's a warning at the beginning of any chapter of anything that'll screw you up. If I ever forget something, LOVE OF GOD, LET ME KNOW. By the way, there is a teeny trigger in this chapter. Self harm mentions and scar mentions. But anyway, I'm going to get to the actual story now, if that's alright with you. And I love you all. I did miss the hell out of you, too. *hugs* I'll see you at the end, ok? (And by the way, there's a something, something in the beginning. If you find it, don't say anything, but PM me to redeem your virtual high five.)

Well, I couldn't say my summer was too horrible. A whole summer with my sister and a week alone with my boyfriend before he had to go back to Japan? I couldn't complain. Other than the brief hiccup of dealing with my parents for a two-week stint after he left, but I had Rhiannon to keep me grounded. And with my last night in New York, I only wanted one thing.

A quiet night in. Just me, Rhiannon, and her giant, ginger labradoodle Maka. He was a good boy, though. Every night, we had developed a routine. Once I got comfortable on the pull-out couch and Rhi went to bed, Maka would jump onto my bed, curl up at my feet, and lay his head on my legs. I was going to miss him when I leave for London.

"Do you have to go back tomorrow?" Rhiannon pouted while the Sound of Music filled the background with Maria's favorite things, "I don't want you to."

"Yeah," I wrapped up in my blanket, "I don't want to either."

"How am I going to explain that to Maka?" she pointed out as the gentle giant cuddled with me, "He's going to be crushed, sitting at the door, staring it down, wondering when you'll come back."

"Sorry, Maka," I rubbed his belly, "Auntie Lana's going back to London at five o'clock tomorrow morning. I'll miss you, too, buddy."

"I swear," Rhiannon teased, "You're going to miss my dog more than me."

"Of course I am," I scratched Maka's head, "Look at his face. It's too cute for words."

"I have to give you that," she agreed, "Maka's kind of a doll. You should see his Christmas sweater."

"Rhiannon," I shook my head at her, "He is his Christmas sweater. You don't need to dress him."

"It's only for the Christmas card," she promised, "And when it's brutally cold outside and he has to go out to poo."

"Don't worry, Maka," I promised, "Before I leave, I'll burn your Christmas sweater."

"I'll just knit him another one!" Rhiannon sang as her dog gave my face the licking of a lifetime.

Leaving was really going to suck. But I had school Monday morning. And I needed to get used to living on London time again. Four different time zones. I've lived in four different time zones. Iowa time. New York time. London time. Tokyo time. The bounce between going to Waterloo to see my parents and Williamsburg to see Rhiannon wasn't too difficult to manage. That's only an hour difference. But from Williamsburg to London? That was five hours. That was practically night and day for me.

Unfortunately, Rhiannon wasn't at the airport to see me off. I thought I'd let her sleep. I gave Maka one last pet before I left and headed to JFK for my seven-hour flight to Heathrow. I've gotten so used to flying that my anxiety managed to hold off for me. Bless. I've had panic attacks on flights before. I didn't want to do that again. Although, the Xanax did its job. Speaking of things doing their job, I knew I had one stop I absolutely had to make before I went anywhere else.

"Hello," the receptionist greeted me, "Can I help you?"

"My name is Lana Smith," I said, "I'm here to see Dr. Moreno."

"Of course," she looked through her date book, "You don't have an appointment?"

"She doesn't need one," Dr. Moreno came out, "Hello, Lana. I was just about to go home."

"I'm sorry," I apologized, "I've been through a million time changes today and I just got off my flight."

"It's fine, dear," she allowed, "My office, then?"

"Yeah," I followed my doctor into her familiar office that I've logged many an hour in.

"So, Lana," Dr. Moreno looked me over, "How are you? You look awfully well, given you just landed."

"I am," I confirmed, biting my tongue, "I mean, for what it's worth, I guess."

"And how was your summer?" she asked, studying me closely, looking for any sort of changes in my movements.

"Better than what I expected," I glanced down at my wrists where the big, beautiful sakura blossoms bloomed out of my old cutting scars, "I've been ok."

"That's right," Dr. Moreno chimed, "Didn't you say you were visiting your sister?"

"Yeah," I nodded, "What about it?"

"Well?" she smiled, "Aren't you going to show me? This is just general curiosity at this point. Rhiannon is a tattoo artist, is she not?"

"Ok," I still had that phantom anxiety about showing my forearms. Even though the brilliant pinks and greens masked my scars enough, it was the thought that counts, right? Slowly, but surely, I pushed my cardigan sleeves up, struggling and shaking with every inch.

"It's alright, Lana," Dr. Moreno settled me, "If you still don't want to show me, that's fine, too."

"No," I pushed myself, "I can show you. It'd be a shame if I didn't."

"Alright," she watched in anticipation.

"My boyfriend designed it," I exposed the view of the Ouran courtyard, "He made sure that every flower covered enough. It wasn't uncommon for him to draw on me when I was still living in Japan. Anytime he'd stay over, I'd wake up with something on my arms just so I wouldn't have to wake up to my scars. The first time he drew on me was when I had my close call. I called him at two in the morning crying. And he was there."

"And what did he draw on you?" Dr. Moreno wondered.

"Lotus blossoms," I thought back to that night. And my boyfriend's words echoed in my brain. How the red reflected the blue. The passion reflected the wisdom and the wisdom reflected the passion.

"This is truly remarkable, Lana," she traced over it, "Rhiannon did a beautiful job. And your boyfriend is quite the talented artist."

"Yeah, he is," I smiled, "Rhiannon wants him to come work with her this coming summer and teach him how to use a tattoo gun, but that involves going all the way from Tokyo to New York."

"Do you miss him?" she asked, "Your boyfriend."

"Of course," I felt a sudden emptiness in my chest. I hadn't seen him in a couple months and I missed the hell out of him, "I'll call him before I go to bed, though, so we should be ok."

"And what about now?" Dr. Moreno threw her notes down, "Do you plan on reacquainting yourself with the city?"

"It's no Tokyo," I sighed out, "But there is one place I need to go."

"I think we're done for the day then," she decided, "I really am proud of the progress you've made, Lana. Maybe you should consider going back to Tokyo."

"Ouran tuition isn't exactly cheap," I cringed, remembering that letter from admissions that still haunted my dreams, "I don't have that kind of money and I don't think I could apply for another scholarship."

"There are other schools in the area you could consider," she pointed out, "Tokyo is good for you."

Even worse than the admissions letter was Beni-bara's offer burning in my soul. She told me she could've gotten me another year in Tokyo. That would've been just enough to get me to graduation. But leaving my boys like that? I couldn't do it. I didn't have the heart for it. I needed them and in a way, they needed me. I couldn't…

"I know," I shrugged, "But I don't think I'd be a good fit anywhere else. I've made a home at Ouran and there's no place like home."

"I understand," Dr. Moreno showed me out, "It's always lovely to see you, Lana. Now, that place you were talking about. The one you need to go to before you go home. Go there. Doctor's orders."

"I will," I waved my doctor off and started toward the first bus I found. There was a little pub down the road from the dorms that I had talked about when he and I were in Karuizawa for the weekend. And if I was going to emotionally eat, there was nothing I wanted more than the best braised lamb in all of London.

"Oi!" the bartender yelled at me as I sat at the bar, "Aren't you a little young to be in here?"

"There aren't any tables," I defended, realizing this place was more packed than usual.

"Alright," he let me go, "What'll you have?"

"Braised lamb please," I ordered, keeping my head down, "And if you could put it in a takeaway container, that'd be great."

"Sure," he gave me a quick nod and headed into the back. Granted, it wasn't going to be as good as his, but I still needed some braised lamb in my stomach. Airplane food never agreed with me and I hadn't eaten much.

I grabbed my food off the counter and headed back to the dorms. Hopefully, I could sneak in, get up to my room, stuff my face, and call it a night in peace. However, because I can't be allowed nice things, the head bitch herself was sitting in the common room with the TV remote in her hand, thumbing through the channels. It's alright, Lana. Just keep your head down. Don't make eye contact. Eye contact was how she got your soul. You'll be fine.

"Lana!" Victoria chimed venomously, "Welcome back!"

Dammit, "Hi, Victoria."

"Where were you?" she asked, "You were gone all last term. Where were you?"

"Um…" I stared down at my feet, "Me?"

"Yeah, you," Victoria cranked my head back, "Come back brain dead, did we?"

"I was in Japan," I quivered, really wanting to go to my room now.

Ring, ring.

"Who's that?" she snarled, ready to tear me to ribbons.

I glanced down at my phone screen and let out a heavy sigh of relief, "It's my sister. I really need to take this."

"She's breaking up our conversation," Victoria pouted, "Doesn't she know that's incredibly rude of her?"

I escaped Victoria's grasp and bolted to my room, throwing my lamb on my bed, "Hey, Rhi. You couldn't have called at a better time."

"Hey," she sounded nervous, "You make it to London ok?"

"Yeah," I started tearing into my food. One bite and I was home, "I'm fine. I just left Dr. Moreno's office and grabbed some dinner. I'm good."

"What are we eating this evening?" Rhiannon asked.

"Braised lamb," I murmured through a mouthful, "And it's fantastic."

"Is that the braised lamb you bragged up from the bar?" she assumed.

"The very same," I moaned, "Although, there's this boy in Tokyo that does it better."

"Really?" Rhiannon gasped, "Your Japanese boyfriend makes better traditional English comfort food than your bar?"

"And his American girlfriend makes killer Chinese," I reminded her, "What about it?"

"Just saying it's weird," she brushed me off, "So, you're sure everything's ok?"

"Positive."

"Flight was good?"

"Yes."

"Your melon's on kilter?"

"Yes," I lied, not wanting her to worry. I could've used her dog at my feet right about now, but other than that.

"You need me send you anything?" she offered, "Care package? Brownies?"

"No," I sighed, "I'm tired, Rhi. I think I'm just going to go to bed."

"Alright," she let me go, "Just wanted to check in. Make sure you were ok."

"I'm fine."

"Good night, Lana!"

Click.

In all seriousness, I wasn't fine. I was empty. Depression was getting the best of me. And it only got worse when I ran out of lamb and my mashed potatoes were gone. I just felt weightless. Although, I knew exactly what it was. This wasn't a random spell. I missed my boys. I wouldn't have my host club waiting for me when I walk into school in the morning. I wasn't going to have the music room to ease my mind. All I had was my tattoos. The better scars commemorating my time spent at the Ouran Academy. I knew something that would make me feel better. It was seven o'clock in Tokyo right now. A certain someone needed an alarm clock.

"Hello?" a grumbly voice answered.

"Good morning, Kyoya," my heart melted. Damn, I wanted to go back to Japan.

"Good morning, Lana," he perked up a little more, "You ok?"

I felt a lump swell in the back of my throat. No. No, Lana. Don't you dare. Don't you dare start with that, "I miss you. I don't want to go to school tomorrow."

"I miss you, too," Kyoya promised, easing my aching heart, "The host club isn't going to be the same without you. It's bad enough we'll have to manage without Honey-senpai and Mori-senpai. I don't know how we'll do it."

"Will you come over?" I curled into my body pillow, wishing so desperately that it would turn into him.

"You're a little far from me, Lana," he pointed out, "It's not like when you were living in Tokyo and I could be there at the drop of a hat."

"Please…?"

The silence on the other end was killing me. And if I didn't know any better, I could hear a break in Kyoya's voice, "The first chance I get, ok? I'll come and see you."

"Ok," I swallowed back tears, "I'm going to go to bed. It's been a long day and I'm kind of tired."

"It's funny, isn't it?" Kyoya chuckled a bit, "You call me in the morning just to say good night."

"These time zones are going to be the death of us," I smiled, burying my face in my pillow, hoping that would muffle the light sobs I couldn't hold back anymore.

"We'll be fine," he promised, "Go to sleep, Lana. I'll call you after school and wake you up, ok?"

"Ok," I wiped my eyes, barely able to hold onto my phone anymore.

"I love you…"

Click.

Damn, I missed Japan...

A/N: And here we have the end of chapter one. This made my heart hurt a little bit. I miss Kyoya already, too. Don't worry, though. We'll get through this. It's just a minor setback. When she wakes up, Kyoya will be her body pillow and everything will be ok. Unfortunately, no. That's not what's going to happen. And I'm sorry for being a jerk and put it in your heads in the first place. Now, tomorrow, if you're interested, I'm going to be starting a Yuri On Ice fic and I'm so very, very excited. I've never written for Yuri On Ice before. Keep an eye on my profile. It's an AU, but it's going to be fluffy as hell. See you next chapter! xx