I'm sure y'all I've wondered why
I always seem tah be outta mah mind.
Ever since I came onto the scene
I've always acted like I'm in a perpetual dream.
Well the story is old
It's from eighth grade
Back before I had this mane.
My buddies and I we went to a party
But fo' some reason nobody had told us
That this party was a pot fest!
So here we are a bunch of like twelve year olds!
Seeing a monkey get high off a some rolls.
And we stayed fo' like seven hours
'Cause we passed out
I hit my head on the shower.
I must 've breathed in like eight tons of weed
Since my feet looked like they was eatin' my knees!
Eventually we thought all dis shit must be 'kay
Since like fo' hundred people were there that day.
I must have used up like eight pounds on my own
When I heard someone's mobile phone.
And he was all like
"Fuck, the cops!"
Me and my friends had no idea what was up.
So I was all sleepy and I closed my eyes
Woke up four days later hospitalized.
My mom and dad were all like
"Oh my gawd you're alive!"
And I'm like
"I can't feel my insides!
No wait
I never could before."
Then I fell asleep again and started to snore.
Twelve hours later I woke up
Felt an itchin' sensation in my cu—
"Oh my gawd!" I screamed.
"Did that party give me an STD?"
Luckily fo' me
Antibiotics are pretty effective.
But now I think condoms are Jumanji!
"Tomo," said Yomi, "that's stupid."
"I tell you it's all true!" the "wildcat" screamed.
"Oh my gawd!" yelled Osaka, "Tomo! You promised you would never tell anyone that story!"
"Wait," said Yomi, "It's true?"
"I'm so embarrassed," whimpered Osaka, "To think me and my friends all went to a pot fest. That's why I'm all spacey now! The damn mary jane rotted away my brain!"
"This shit is just weird," Yomi responded.
"I bet I could beat her in a pot smoking contest!" yelled Kagura.
"NO!" Osaka screamed, "Never again!"
"Then I bet I could beat Yukari in a drinking contest!"
"How?" asked everyone, "You've never used alcohol before in your entire life."
"Then I bet I could beat Sakaki in a sex contest!"
"I like where this is goin'," said Sakaki, Kimura, Quagmire, and Michael Jackson.
"Wait," said Kagura, "I thought I killed you!"
"Don't you know I'm only here in spirit?" asked little Michael.
"No," Kagura admitted.
"Well we'd better be going then," said Michael Jackson and Quagmire in unison, "Hee hee hee!"
"I'd better go teach my class before I get fired," Kimura admitted.
"Anyways," said Sakaki, "about that sex contest."
"I was only joking," said Kagura.
"Oh," mumbled Sakaki, "because now my heart is broken."
"You're so gay," said Kagura.
"I know right?"