AN: Once again…. I don't own anyone, nor do I own the song "When you look me in the eyes" by the Jonas Brothers. R&R please… Thanks enjoy reading.
Everything's in John's POV
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I was told to never hurt the heart of whom I love so much. But when I got so busy taking care of that heart, I never noticed…
My own was slowly dying.
But that was before she came into my life. And, right now with her, I look life at a whole new perspective.
-JC&M-JC&MJC&M-JC&M-
If the heart is always searching
Can you ever find a home?
I've been looking for that someone
I'll never make it on my own
Dreams can't take the place of loving you
There's gotta be a million reasons why it's true
I would never forget the first time I met her.
She was a woman like no other. A fantastic physique. A very bright smile always etched on her sweet, innocent face.
Now, I know I've been with a lot of women, but none of them could be ever compared to her.
I was at my best friend Randy's house for a party. His wife Samantha just gave birth to a beautiful baby boy, and of course as proud parents, they threw a party for him.
Everyone there was enjoying. Everyone… except me. I was standing outside their patio, my drink in hand, thinking things through when I heard Randy call me.
"Hey buddy! What are you doing out here? C'mon, the ladies are here" He flashed his infamous smirk then proceeded to go back inside.
I couldn't help but chuckle. I can't believe I got him for a best friend… but I'm grateful that I did. He was the one guy who I could talk to aside from my family. We would understand each other and be there for each other.
"Alright, I'll be there in a minute" I shouted but I doubt that he heard me.
I went back to thinking. Randy and Sam were now an official family. Oh how jealousy easily crept unto me. I wanted to have a family of my own. I wanted to have that someone who I could trust and love. I know I'm starting to sound strange when I talk about love, especially if I'm a grown, "buffed" man… but hey, I'm not getting any younger.
I was so deep in thought when a voice disrupted my reverie. I turned around to see a beautiful woman standing before me. She wore a white, velvet dress that came down just above her knees. Her perfectly colored toe nails popped out from her tanned legs. And her brunette hair that passed a little below her shoulders was glossy and curled. She was absolutely gorgeous, but what really caught my attention were her bright, emerald eyes.
WOW, was all I could think about.
"Oh, I'm sorry I thought no one was in here" She said. She was about to leave when I called out to her.
"Wait! I mean… Its ok, I was just getting some fresh air. You don't have to leave" when she faced me, I immediately caught a glimpse of her eyes once more
"Oh ok, thanks. I wanted to get some fresh air too, almost everyone in there is getting drunk" she giggled as she walked towards me. I smiled, never releasing my gaze.
"My name's Maria by the way, what's yours?" she extended her hand for me to shake and I shook it almost instantly.
"I'm John, a friend of Randy's"
We stood their and talked the night away, trying to know more about each other. And all the while I was talking with her; I felt something that I thought I would never feel again.
When you look me in the eyes
And tell me that you love me
Everything's alright
When you're right here by my side
When you look me in the eyes
I catch a glimpse of heaven
I find my paradise
When you look me in the eyes
After the night of the party, I started seeing Maria more often. I got a hold of her number and at times I would call her just to check up. She didn't mind though. I enjoyed talking to her, and by the way she was when she talked to me, I knew she enjoyed as well.
It's been more than a month now, but we still were still "going strong". No, there's no relationship, but the bond that we built was still firm. We continued on to be friends and being there for each other.
Until I had a realization. I was talking with Randy one morning and he brought Maria up into our conversation.
"So, you and Maria, huh?" he began
"What do you mean 'you and Maria', what about us?" I asked, confused.
"C'mon John, don't play games. You know exactly what I mean by 'you and Maria'. You like her, don't you? As in like her, like her"
"What?! Are you kidding me? Of course I don't like her like that. Sure I like her as a friend but not more than that"
That was the biggest lie I've told him and myself. Of course I like her! Over the pass few weeks that I've been with her, I saw things differently. I learned how to "turn things around". I learned how to be free. And that was all because of her.
"Ok, if you say you don't like her, give me one reason"
"Huh?" I asked again, not comprehending his question
"Why don't you like her? John, you've known her for quite a while now and you hang out with her a lot. Don't tell me you don't feel anything. I know me and Sam do. I mean, we feel something going on between you two"
Hah. I do wish something was going on between us but I'm not sure if I'm willing to take chances. I've loved before of course, but we all know that in love there's always pain, and I'm not sure if I'm ready to take that pain again.
"So… are you gonna answer my question, my friend?" I looked up at him, curiosity still in his eyes
I contemplated before I answered
"You know what, even I don't know why."
How long will I be waiting?
To be with you again
Gonna tell you that I love you
In the best way that I can
I can't take a day without you here
You're the light that makes my darkness disappear
When you look me in the eyes
And tell me that you love me
Everything's alright
When you're right here by my side
When you look me in the eyes
I catch a glimpse of heaven
I find my paradise
When you look me in the eyes
Weeks after my talk with Randy, I couldn't think straight anymore. Different emotions played within me and I knew deep inside that this wasn't 'normal'. I had to release whatever that was bothering me.
I needed to clear my head.
For weeks, I didn't talk to anybody. Not Randy. Not even Maria. Sure, they knew where I was but I told them I needed time alone. I knew they were worried about me, Especially Maria. Randy told me that she wasn't being herself. That the once bubbly Maria was now filled with sadness.
And I was the one doing it to her. But still I did nothing. I wanted to clear everything up before I could face her.
I stayed like that for almost a month until I knew she couldn't take it anymore.
She showed up on my doorstep one night, tears flowing down her cheeks. I didn't know my behavior had this much effect on her. I let her in but didn't say a word. Until she broke the silence.
"What's happening to you John? Why are you doing this?"
I looked up, the light in her eyes, gone.
"I don't know" Those were the first words that came out of my mouth in over a month. But I didn't like it. I wanted to say so much. I wanted to tell her everything right at this moment, but I couldn't.
"What do you mean you don't know? You have to know! John, you got me worried sick. I didn't know if you were alright, and let alone I didn't know if you were still alive! Why won't you just tell me what's wrong"
I was startled by the conviction in her voice. Why did she even care so much? I'm just her friend.
"What are you talking about, Maria? There's nothing wrong" I tried to convince her but I knew she wouldn't buy it. She was a smart woman and she wouldn't stop until she knew what was going on.
"Please John, talk to me. Tell me what's bothering you. For the past month that you didn't call or see me, I had no idea what to do. I tried getting Randy or Sam to tell me what's going on but even they didn't know. C'mon John, I care about you a lot" Her voice was softer now and I don't know if I could still ignore her at that.
'I care about you a lot' her words filled my head. She cared about me. And now everything was clear. I made my way to where she stood and in an instant; my lips found its way to hers.
More and more I start to realize
I can reach my tomorrow
I can hold my head up high
And it's all because you're by my side
When you look me in the eyes
And tell me that you love me
Everything's alright
When you're right here by my side
And when I hold you in my arms
I know that it's forever
I just gotta let you know
I never wanna let you go
She really did make the difference in my life. And with her there was no pain. She taught me how to love again. And my heart felt alive once more.
She knows that I love her and I know that she loves me too… for her eyes says it all.
'Cause when you look me in the eyes
And tell me that you love me
Everything's alright
When you're right here by my side
When you look me in the eyes
I catch a glimpse of heaven
I find my paradise
When you look me in the eyes
-JC&M-JC&MJC&M-JC&M-
So, what do you think? I know at some parts it's not that related with the song but I tried my best. Hopefully, you liked it though.
Review please, and thanks for taking time to read it.
-Charmaine-