Warning: Slash. Don't like it, don't read, because that is just silly. Don't know what slash is? That is what Wikipedia is for!
Disclaimer: I double checked my passport and I am still not JK Rowling.
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Blind Dates
By Rekahneko
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Sirius Black, sixth year Gryffindor, flopped down onto the couch next to his friend Remus Lupin. The book which seemed to occupy so much of his roommate's attention received a disdainful look.
"Moony, you're coming to Hogsmeade tomorrow, right?"
Remus barely looked up from his text and replied with a sigh, "No, I will be in the library. OWLS are coming up you know."
"Months from now! You really need to take a break. Anyhow, you have to come. I got you a date."
"You WHAT?" Remus' head jerked up at the announcement.
Self satisfied smile in place, Sirius blithely continued. "A date. A nice girl, Hufflepuff, blond, Fifth Year, I forget her name…"
"Damnit Sirius, how many times have I told you not to set me up again? Did you ever think that maybe when I said no more dates, I actually meant I didn't want to be set up on any more dates?"
"Oh but you will love this one. I am pretty sure she…"
"No." Remus gritted his teeth, his knuckles white around the edges of the book. Unfortunately for Sirius, it wasn't noticed.
"But Moooooony!"
"I said no! Leave it alone Sirius." By this time, Remus was close to yelling, book on the couch, fists clenched.
"But I promised her!" The black haired boy whined to his friend, too used to getting his way to stop.
"Damnit Sirius, I will not go on another pity date with some girl who is just trying to get into your bed by pretending to be interested in me."
Remus stomped upstairs, forgetting his book entirely.
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Sirius found Remus lying on his bed staring blankly up at nothing.
"Moony?"
Remus growled, "I said no Padfoot."
"I brought your book." Sirius held out the heavy tome Remus had been reading down in the common room.
Remus just scowled into space.
"I just came up to say I was sorry. I didn't know you were so adamant about the whole thing. You just haven't been on a date in such a long while, and I thought…"
"Well don't think." Remus cut off his friend with a sharp gesture and then turned his gaze back to the canopy over his bed.
Sirius wordlessly placed the abandoned book on his friend's bed and stood there awkwardly for a moment.
After running his hands through his hair nervously, Sirius continued, "Do you really believe that all the girls are just interested because of me?"
"I suppose not all of them, no." Remus sighed, finally looking over at the black haired boy. "Listen, why are you so concerned about my lack of a social life anyhow?"
"You are my friend! Of course I worry. I just want you to be happy." Sirius was glad that his friend's short burst of anger was apparently over. Remus was extremely forgiving and rarely got angry but his temper was a bit frightening when it did appear.
"Well," Remus said, after a moment spent thinking carefully, "I suppose we should talk about it then."
"Okay." Sirius sat down on the very edge of the bed, nervous now that Remus wanted to talk. When he used that tone, it wasn't usually going to be a comfortable conversation.
Remus shifted to his side and propped his head up with a pillow.
"Sirius," he said, choosing his words carefully, "I have to agree that a romantic relationship does sound nice. And Merlin knows I have at least as many hormones raging around as anyone else. But there are some things I just wouldn't give up for the possibility of that sort of thing."
"What wouldn't you give up? And why do you have to give up anything at all?"
"Well, to answer your first question, I wouldn't give up my friends for anything." Remus looked pointedly at Sirius. "My education here at Hogwarts comes in a close second."
"And you would have to give these up to have a romantic relationship how? I am really not following you Remus."
"Listen, I'm not like you Sirius. I can't just go make out with someone and not get emotionally involved."
"So you are basically saying I am a slut?" Sirius grinned and fluttered his eyelashes to show he was joking.
Remus rolled his eyes, continuing as if he hadn't heard. "And if I get involved, eventually my 'furry little problem' will come up. Either I run around feeling guilty and eventually break down and tell them or they figure it out on their own."
"You need to work on that guilt thing."
"Yeah well until then, I am stuck. Listen, I am just not willing to take chances that whoever it is won't panic and get me expelled from the school. It just isn't worth it."
"How do you know that you would get attached anyhow? I mean, you haven't really done that much kissing in the first place, have you?"
"Enough to know."
"With who? That one Ravenclaw I set you up with last year? I thought you guys didn't end up doing much of anything before you broke it off. One of the other girls I set you up with?"
"Sirius, I am not going to detail the sad history of my romantic entanglements for your edification."
"Yeah, but aren't you going to tell me?" Sirius grinned, pretending to misunderstand his friend's large vocabulary.
Remus gave his friend a small smile in response. "Just believe me that sometimes I get attached much too quickly, okay?"
"Fine. There must be something we can do to help you date though. You are missing out on so much fun!"
"Well, I would only date someone who already knows and is okay with it." After a short pause, he added, "and of course, none of my friends would ever consider telling anyone else, even if they thought the person would be fine with it, right?" A hard look came into the blond boy's eyes as they narrowed and looked over at Sirius.
"I hear ya loud and clear. Telling someone about your furry little problem so they would be on your Dateable List is right out. Like I would have done that!" Sirius tried to look offended without letting on that Remus had guessed correctly at the very first thought to cross his mind.
"Right. Anyhow, let's just look at the list of people who know. Besides my parents, we have Madame Pomfrey, Dumbledore, and the rest of the teachers. Thought Dumbledore is quite the looker, I think that dating a teacher is grounds for expulsion. My unrequited lust for the headmaster will just have to stay unrequited."
Sirius was too busy laughing at the image in his head of Remus and the headmaster to interject one of the many comments that otherwise might have come out of his mouth.
"Now let's move on. Lily knows. She guessed a few months ago. What do you think Sirius? Should I date her? Sadly, one of the requirements of staying here at Hogwarts as a student is to be alive; I doubt I would be when James heard I was dating 'his' Lily." When Lily suggested the two of them go on a Hogsmeade date, Remus remembered having to explain to Lily about his fear of James' wrath. Remus thought it was the better part of valor to avoid relating that particular story though.
"Then there is Snape. I could ask him to date me but sadly, he would rather have me, the werewolf, 'put down' than 'put out.'" Remus sported a rather weak smile at his feeble joke.
Sirius was startled for a moment at the inclusion of a guy in the list. Listing Snape wasn't the same as joking about Dumbledore. And it also sounded almost as if Remus was hurt by Snape's bad reaction to the news.
"Listen Moony, he is a git. You can't judge people by comparing them to him! You didn't actually believe that he would have accepted you after finding out you are a werewolf, did you?"
"I had hoped that he might, actually. I know it was stupid." Remus looked down at the floorboards with such a sad expression that Sirius wondered if he hadn't missed something important between Remus and Snape.
"Well, forget about him. There are other fish in the sea."
"Are there really? There are only three other people who know about me being a werewolf. James is out with his Lily obsession and as far as I know, you and Peter are as straight as they come."
"So you wouldn't mind dating a guy?" For some reason, Sirius really wanted to know the answer to this question.
"I'm not too particular either way. But in case you missed it, that doesn't matter since there is literally no one I can date."
"So you would only go out with someone who already knew you were a werewolf and was okay with it?"
Remus rolled his eyes at Sirius' persistence. "Well, they would have to actually want to go out with me too. No pity dates. And I wasn't kidding about getting too attached too quickly. I don't think I would want to be with someone who would move on right away."
Sirius took a moment to consider the words of his friend. He opened his mouth to speak but then closed it again without saying anything.
"Listen Sirius, don't worry about it. I am fine the way things are right now. Having friends like you make everything worthwhile; I don't need anything else in my life." Remus sent a genuine smile over to the dark haired boy sitting next to him.
"All right, Remus."
"Maybe things will be different after school ends. I will be listed in the Werewolf Registry at that point anyhow, so it will be a matter of public record. Maybe I will feel more comfortable telling people." Remus shrugged. "Anyhow, it is about time for dinner. Let's go."
Sirius followed his friend out of the dorm, a thoughtful look on his face.
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Several weeks later, Sirius and Remus were returning from the owlery together when Sirius suddenly stopped walking. Remus kept moving for a few steps, noticed his friend's absence, and stopped. He turned around and glance inquisitively at his roommate. Sirius stared at him for a moment and then pulled Remus into an empty classroom.
"What do you want, Sirius?" Remus asked, curiously.
"Remus," he hesitated, cleared his throat, and continued. "I was hoping to set you up on a date."
"I thought we already talked about this, Sirius. No blind dates." Remus crossed his arms over his chest and frowned at his friend.
"This one wouldn't be a blind date exactly."
"You know I am not going on a date with someone who doesn't already know about… me."
"Remus, I…" Sirius paused for a moment to gather himself. "Remus, I already know about you."
"I don't understand."
"I was hoping to set you up on a date with me. I mean, only if you wanted to of course," he said, looking down as if his shoelaces were terribly fascinating.
"Oh." He thought for a moment. "With you? On a date?" Remus sounded a bit bewildered.
"Well not if you don't want to or anything. I just thought maybe it might be nice."
"So you are just trying to be nice," Remus inquired, faintly.
"No! I mean, yes. But in a good way."
"I don't need your pity, Sirius," Remus said, sadly.
"I wouldn't be doing it because I felt sorry for you, Moony."
Remus just looked at him, confused. Clearly not getting his point across, Sirius continued, hoping he would start making sense soon.
"I like you, Remus, as more than a friend. And I remember what you said about wanting someone who wouldn't leave you right away for someone else. I know what you are probably thinking but I won't." Sirius tried to convey the earnest nature of his words through his eyes, hoping Remus could see how he felt.
"A date with you," Remus repeated, still trying to work through his surprise.
Sirius scuffed his shoes against the stone floor nervously and waited, saying nothing.
"Really?"
Sirius looked up at his schoolmate solemnly. "Yes, really."
Remus peered closely into his friend's eyes, and then beamed brightly as he apparently found what he was looking for. "I would love to."
Sirius was surprised but delighted as Remus quickly leaned in, giving him a small kiss on the lips and then a brilliant grin.
As he basked in the glowing smile Remus was sending him, Sirius set his mind to planning the best Hogsmeade date ever for his favorite werewolf.