Holds up sign: I can't talk right now, getting over 'Strep Throat', voice like old man. Am drowning self in steaming tea with honey.

Disclaimer: Ed, Al, and the rest of Full Metal Alchemist do not belong to me; and don't sue me (what, do we have lawyers coming the columns now?) but I can't recall exactly who owns it.

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Edward collapsed on the soft bed face down and lay still, hoping he could suffocate himself this way.

The inn was familiar and modest, it was the same one they stayed in every time they were summoned to Central.

Well, technically, he thought, only he was summoned to Central, Al just sorta came along for the ride.

Why couldn't they just forget about him for a little while, and let him be in peace. He didn't have time to waste dancing around for the idiots in Central. There were so many reasons to hate Central: the needless detour, speculating officials, rampaging murders. The king of all the nut jobs in the city: Roy 'The Flaming Nutcase' Mustang.

If he EVER cornered that guy in an alley...

A nice, long, dark alley. He really deserved it this time, a little revenge on the egomaniac.

Always that guy smirked from behind his desk when he gave him an assignment, ready for the outraged righteous fit from yours truly. He must savor it, the brightest moments of his day.

He hoped he choked on it someday. Just keeled over dead.

Ed grinned savagely into the feather pillow at seeing Roy pulling an assignment folder out of his desk, then falling stone dead on top of it.

Where he got these ones, these twisted, idiotic, time-consuming assignments Ed had no clue; God, or the Devil, could have handed them to him personally for all he knew. Neither of them seemed to be on his side, so it could be either.

Ed wallowed in his 'everybody hates me, the world hates me, god hates me' attitude like the sulking teenager he was.

"Brother?" the wooden door opened, Al clanked softly as he stepped into the room. Silence stood next to a question in the room.

"It's just some stupid assignment Al," Edward rolled over to his side and looked worn out. Al sat on his own bed, even if he didn't need one, to prompt him to continue.

"They need me to head a research team," he continued disgustedly, "the fact that I transmute without a circle is a popular subject of everybody higher up. They finally got somebody to do something about it; they were either going to have me as part of the research team, or use me like some sort of guinea pig."

"They can't do that big brother, they can't just take state alchemists and lock them away!" started Al, getting all edgy in the morals field.

"Ya they can Al. Remember the criminal facility? They were used like guinea pig, like animals, all for the convenience of human test subjects nobody would raise a fuss about. They just...disappeared." Ed stared out the window, remembering the two brothers, trapped in a suit of armor, and Barry the chopper.

Man, that guy had done a number on Al. Sicko, twisting his mind like that; it had taken weeks and a trip back to the Winry's to wake him up from the nightmare that he wasn't alive.

"I wouldn't let them," the young voice came low like a promise.

"Nevermind, come on Al, it's fine now," Ed tried to cheer up with a tired grin, trying to change the mood he had put his little brother in, "I'll just pretend to help them a little, lead them in circles. Pretty soon they'll get too bored or frustrated and just drop it. Government alchemists hate getting nowhere."

'We should know.'

"How long is it going to take Ed?" Al asked.

"Dunno Al. Maybe a month, maybe more, maybe less if I can help it," he shot a mischievous smile at the suit of armor.

"When does it start, we can't stay here forever, the philosopher's stone is still out there. Somewhere. I want to go back to my body, but it's not like we have a time limit so a month or two isn't going to hurt our search."

Halfway through the reply Edward's gaze turned thoughtful and worrying, it was turned inwards to the pain he felt, both for his brother and himself.

"It starts on the third, the beginning of October so everyone can arrive and have time to set up. I don't have to do anything to get ready," he crossed his arms behind his head on the pillow,

"I just have to show up."

FIN

Holds up another sign: If you love me, send me tea---I mean reviews!

Rating may change to M for violence, blood, gore, and stuff.

Letter to fans: For those of you reading this because I'm on your 'Author Alert', the reason I haven't updated my stories (especially my Transformers one) in a while is because I have gotten sick with said strep throat. Funny since I haven't been around anyone sick. And we all know how you just want to lie in bed and sleep when you are sick. Still had to go to the beginning of school though, sucked badly. Made a great impression when they called attendance though lol.