I lay on my bed pretending to listen to the ancient radio sitting the dresser in my room, silent tears running down my face. It had been a month since....he left me. At first the pain was excruciating, and still was, but I had grown numb to it. I had grown numb to everything. Friends, feelings, my poor father, who was going insane with worry. I try not to let other see my pain, why should they have to suffer with me? Suddenly the title of the new song on the radio caught my attention. "My Immortal", it announced before a smooth melody came flowing through the speakers. Oh, the irony, I though dully, but began to listen to the song nonetheless.

I'm so tired of being here

Suppressed by all my childish fears

And if you have to leave

I wish that you would just leave

'Cause your presence still lingers here

And it won't leave me alone

I blinked, startled. I had never really liked Forks when I was younger, but it had become one of my favorite places after I met... him. Now it was filled with far too many reminders, all of which caused nothing but agony so strong that it physically hurt.

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

The tears, which had momentarily stopped, began to flow freely down my face yet again. It was true, the pain was as excruciating as any physical wound could ever be. And it never got better, never healed. It was simply a gaping wound, impossible to bandage and unable to heal.

When you cried I'd wipe away all of your tears

When you'd scream I'd fight away all of your fears

And I held your hand through all of these years

But you still have

All of me

He did still have all of me. Mentally, physically, in every way possible. He carried my heart with him, leaving my completely empty. I knew that he could never really of been in love with my, the plain, uncoordinated human girl. But I had hoped, so foolishly hoped. I thought protect me from everything, including myself, like my own guardian angel. But I always knew he would someday see me for what I was. Dull, plain, and unable control my unruly reactions. And then he left, taking my heart and soul with him.

You used to captivate me

By your resonating light

Now I'm bound by the life you left behind

I couldn't help that I had fallen in love with him, and I didn't regret it. Not even now, through my agony, I wouldn't have wished for anything different than the time we had together. He was beautiful, kind, compassionate, talented in everything, yet he is not mine anymore. But I can't forget him.

Your face it haunts

My once pleasant dreams

Your voice it chased away

All the sanity in me

I shuddered. True, I was terrified to go to sleep every night, knowing that I would be haunted with dreams of nothing. Of empty forests, and being alone. Even now I was putting off going to sleep under the pretense of reading a book incase Charlie decided to check in on me.

These wounds won't seem to heal

This pain is just too real

There's just too much that time cannot erase

I've tried so hard to tell myself that you're gone

But though you're still with me

I've been alone all along

The song ended and I reached over to turn off the radio with a click so loud in the silent house that I flinched. Getting off the bed I walked over to my window. My tears had stopped now, I don't think there are any left. Besides, crying didn't help the pain. No outlet would help. I sat and stared at the starts, unusually bright and beautiful for Forks. It had been sunny today. I looked up at the dazzling diamonds in the sky, and the glowing moon, but I saw no beauty. Not anymore. With a resigned sigh, I returned to my bed and lay down, preparing myself for another nightmare.