Draco shivered, laying down in the cold bed. It wasn't warm anymore and hadn't been for weeks. He almost laughed to himself, it didn't matter if it was spring or summer, the bed would always be cold without her lying next to him. He shut his eyes as tightly as he could and tried to picture the beautiful witch next to him.
He could see her red hair, one of the many things he loved about her. Her smile, the gentle words she used to whisper to him late at night, when she thought he was long asleep.
He needed to shower, needed to get out of this bed, needed to remember what today was, but he couldn't. His body was blocking it, his eyes stinging with pain. He got up, stumbling infront of a mirror. He looked at himself as properly as he could, his gray eyes stared back, red rims stared back, a cross of rage and depression.
He slowly dragged himself into the shower, slowly working shampoo throughout his hair, his limbs felt heavy, and he couldn't force them to keep going on anymore.
"Draco, baby. Try to remember for me." A voice rang out, he kept his eyes closed, if his eyes were closed, he wouldn't have to think, he could stay perfectly still. But that wasn't the case, it never was.
"Draco, mate. Are you almost ready?" The calm voice of Blaise came floating in. 'No, no, no. I wish I was dead.' he muttered to himself before answering him, so he wouldn't come busting into the room.
He slowly got out of the bathtub, still feeling dirty. But that feeling was going to stay, no matter how much he washed. He slowly picked out a black suit, it was fitting against his pale skin. He looked at himself in the mirror and felt wrong. Like he shouldn't be doing this.
"Come on Draco, you'll be late." He didn't want to look, he didn't want to see her. He knew if he looked he wouldn't leave his room, not today, not any day.
"Good, I hope I'm late, I hope I die." He told her honestly, while looking down at his shoes. She was sitting on the bed, he wanted to go over there, to feel her soft skin, to give kisses that he always gave her in the mornings.
"Don't say things like that." Her small voice demand. "Why? It's true." He muttered back. He knew Blaise would come in soon if he didn't move. He took two steps forward, feeling a heavy pressure in his chest. 'Good,' he thought to himself, 'maybe I'll die today. Wouldn't it be fitting.' Before stepping out of the door.
His friend gave me a sad look, but Draco didn't want to deal with it, he didn't want to deal with anything, he just wanted to lie back down in his bedroom and forget anything ever happened at all.
"I'm going to grab a few things, then we can head out, okay?" He spoke to Draco like he was a small child, so easily broken. Draco didn't bother to respond, he just stood there, waiting. Waiting for someone to jump out and tell him this was all a joke. But it never came, so he didn't respond.
"You should talk to him." That small voice again, Draco wanted to ignore it, but he couldn't, he never could ignore her. She was his saint, his angel. "I'm not going to talk to him, I don't even want to do this." He knew the whine in his voice was coming out, but on this day, it was okay.
"Draco, baby. Please, please, try to remember for me." He ignored that, he couldn't respond, he didn't know what she wanted him to remember, and didn't want to ask, the pain baring too hard on his chest. "I don't want too." His voice sounded so small.
He could see her shake her head, he could see the outlines, the traces. He wanted to look at her, he wanted to hold her. But his body felt cold with false numbness. Blaise had been gone for a few minutes, but it felt like hours to Draco.
He could hear the blood rushing around inside of his body, he could hear his heart thump, and it disgusted him. Then the voice came again. "Draco, baby. Look at me, please?" This was something he couldn't ignore, not ever.
He slowly turned his head to her, he saw her beautiful hair, loose curls swaying, like there was a gentle breeze. Her brown eyes, still the same beautiful shade he remembered, her beautiful pink lips, which were in a frown. A light green dress that hugged her body in all the right places.
He felt hot tears welt up in his eyes, but he couldn't bare himself to look away, she was beautiful. She was always beautiful. He tried to smile at her, but his face held still, while she bit her bottom lip out of nervousness. "Baby." She tried again, but failed. This was the hard part, but it had to be done. She gave him a small smile before telling him to try and remember.
Blaise came back into the room and asked him once more if he was ready to go. He nodded and walked out of the door with him. He could feel the stares on everyone on his back. He didn't want it, he didn't want to be here.
Blaise quickly walked him up to the front, before sitting down. Draco kept looking at the picture of her. She held her head up high, and gave him a small sweet smile, that was laced with so much sadness. He knew what this was, he didn't want this, he wanted to hold her one last time.
Then it started.
"We gather here today to celebrate the life of Ginevra Malfoy, who has now returned to her home with Our God, The Father."
It finally hit Draco that this was real, and this was his beautiful wife's funeral. His body returned to the numb state, and his body went on autopilot for the rest of the funeral. He could hear her family sobbing. He wanted to be strong for her, he wanted to be the man she married, but he could feel the hot liquid streaming down his face.
He looked back at the picture, she gave him a sad smile while tilting her head side to side. There wasn't anything else that could be done. He wanted to lay down in a hole and die. He wish he could have changed it, to change her mind, and to stop what happened. But he knew deep down nothing could change it.
Finally, it was time for him to meet with everyone who attended, first it was Fred and Gorge, they whispered their apologizes and moved on. It probably hurt them to think that their only baby sister would be in the ground very soon. He was on autopilot, just saying thank you's to everyone until he got to Harry. Harry eyed Draco before letting him know there was going to be a family dinner and he could attend. He could hear her voice again. "Go Draco, please go."
He knew his time with her was ending soon, and he wanted to the last thing she wanted from him. He agreed and after he watched her go into the ground he appeared to the Barrow. Molly was bustling about, keeping busy to not think about her daughter dying.
Harry was sitting on the couch with a small blanket wrapped in his arms. Draco knew what it was, he could feel his heart thumping and the light voice in his 'Try to remember, baby.' He slowly walked up to Harry, before sitting down next to him.
His daughter was in Harry's arms. Her reddish blonde hair, and her golden eyelashes. She looked just like her mother. Harry quietly handed over the baby, and Draco stared down at her. She was beautiful, just like her mother. But they knew, they knew if this baby lived, Ginny would have a very low rate at living. But she wanted her so badly.
And she did, she held her in her arms, staring at her beautiful baby, while smiling at Draco. They picked out the name. Draco thought they were all wrong, that his wife would live. But shortly later she flat lined and they couldn't bring her back.
He looked down at her, he wanted to hate her, he wanted to want nothing to do with her, but all he could see what her. He couldn't see a black soul, or a killer. He saw a beautiful red light surrounding her tiny little body as she put her hand into her mouth.
"Hello, Addison Monroe Malfoy," Draco said, to his little daughter.
"you look just like your mother." The baby giggled happily in her fathers arms.
'She's beautiful, Draco. Always remember to show her love, and that it's okay if she fails, just to try again.' The voice said in his head. Ginny, he missed her so much, tears threatened to fall down again. He closed his eyes for a second to help keep the tears at bay. When he finally opened them he saw her one last time.
"Draco, my love. It's okay to miss me, but it's okay to move on. Show Addison how much you love her, let her be around my big family, baby. Always remember I love you."
His tears started running again. "I don't want you to go." She smiled sadly at him one last time. "I must, baby. But I'll always be close by." He felt his daughter start to cry, so he said one last thing to his late wife, before she left all together.
"I will always love you Ginevra Malfoy."
"And I will always love you."
Draco held his daughter to his chest and kept repeating the promises he made.