Wishing for the Hopeless
KarolxYuri(Friendship) this is like my second one in 12 hours . This one is as fluffy as a rabbit that's been shaved(which means no fluff btw). You can go read my other one as well, it's a lot brighter lol.
Karol's PoV
Its a bit weird how in the matter of seconds a wonderful triumph can turn into a horrific monstrosity, but that's exactly what happened. Standing before the bright green blastia on Zaude, we were sure that the battle had been won. As the crystal plummeted, and Alexie met his demise, we were sure that we could finally see some peace. Then, as the Adaphagos came, and we were there to face something new, we realized that this had not happen.
And now I stood here, my eyes fixed on a single thought, way to devastated to even put the event in to mind. I wasn't even crying, probably because I really don't understand what happened, but so many thoughts were passing through my head as timed seemed slow down, and the event slowly clicked into my brain. Then one name popped into my little brain, and I screamed his name as I ran towards the edge, fully prepared to jump myself.
"Slow down kid, that isn't going to solve a thing." I hear Raven tell me as he sticks his arm out and holds me back. It might not help, but it certainly would end this. Yuri…No, there was no way this was happening. Yuri was always head strong. He always fought his hardest for what he believed in. Things like this don't happen to people like Yuri. Every little thing I had been taught seemed to crumple and die.
Now I was sure this was a dream, because the world was so blurry. I could barley make out the figure that I was glaring at, but I knew I hated her with every inch of body…but no, this was a dream, a dream that was going to end soon. Only I had come to realize the world was so blurry from my tears, and that in a dream you don't pass out crying as one little fact comes into your mind-Yuri is dead.
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Was it a dream? I glance around the inn; it seems to be the one in Dahngrest. No, that wasn't a dream, it was a nightmare. I kind of found it strange that I was sleeping in the clothes that I wore around while fighting, unless of course I had passed out and someone had carried me here. But no, I was forgetting this was a dream.
I yawn and walk over towards Yuri's bed. He would always let me lay with him if I couldn't sleep. But Yuri wasn't here, he was out for a walk. Or he was dead. No, he was on a walk, he did that a lot. I guess I could just lie in his bed and wait for him to come back, he'll be back soon…Yuri would never leave me. And when I tell myself this I slowly fall back asleep, I can hardly remember the last time I was awake.
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When I wake up I discover I'm alone in the bed. A strange sadness filled me…the same as when the Don died…No, worse than when the Don died. However, when the Don died, Yuri was there for me…but no, Yuri Lowell is dead. I stuff my face into the pillow and start crying…uncontrollably. I really don't care if anyone sees me. My best friend was dead.
No one smiles anymore; Yuri is who got us to do that. Estelle suggested a funeral service for him, but I know that we shouldn't…cause he's gotta be alive. Despite me saying this, I set up a picture of Yuri on my bed stand, and put some flowers I got in town next to it. There roses, I hoped he would like them.
If feels likes days have passed. But I've only been awake for 2 hours. "I think I'm going to head back to Aspio" Rita declared as we all sat at the inn. "What about you Estelle?" I could really care less about the conversation. Whatever would happen, I would be alone. Well, not alone…but without Yuri, and without Yuri, I might as well be alone. I kinda let out a groan and exit the inn.
I head towards the bay, and look out at the infinitely spanning waters. I had to wonder if he was still out there somewhere. I pick up a stone and try skipping it. 'Nice throw Captain Karol' he would have said, then showed me some way to do it even better. My rock just falls and sinks. Without Yuri, I fall and sink.
"What will you be doing now Raven?" I hear Estelle ask when I come back in. "Oh, Karol." She greets me. I don't care; I just head up to the room.
I just pray no one will bother me. They will all try to tell me that I'll get over it…that I need to be more grown-up and learn that change is a part of life. Well I'm pretty grown up, and have been through way more than a 12-year-old boy should have been through. In and out of guilds…then the Don, the one I looked up to as a father died. Then Yuri…the person I loved as a brother fell into a watery grave. I was done growing up. If this is what growing up was, then I'll just die now before I have to deal with any more of it.
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It's evening now, Estelle, Rita, and Judith are about to leave…but I'm not saying goodbye. I look over at the picture of Yuri with the rose next to it and sigh. I just want the day to end. The sooner I sleep, the more time that passes, the more time that passes, the sooner I die, and the sooner I die, then the sooner I get to see Yuri again. I asked Yuri if he believed in heaven once, and he just shrugged and said 'does it matter? I won't be going there anyway.'
I kinda laughed when he said that but then turned to him and said 'But Yuri, if you go to hell, I'll never see you again! Stop being so hard on yourself, geez.'
'Ok' He said 'I'll aim towards going there then for you Captain Karol'
I wish he didn't have to go there so soon.
I see them leaving through the window and decide to go to sleep before I have to see Raven. I change into a white t-shirt and some red boxers and through my bag and axe over to the side.
I close my eyes. Maybe I'll die in my sleep, if the fates are smiling on me today.
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I yawn and wake up disappointed. I know it isn't heaven. I roll out of bed and walk out the door. I'm still in a t-shirt and boxers but I don't really care, the cool air isn't that bad, and there's no one to try to impress anymore.
There's a flower shop in the north part of town. I look for about an hour until I find the perfect flower. A nice blue one I think Yuri would have loved. The lady eyes me strangely. A lot can be said about a 12 year-old with bed hair walking around in 30-degree weather wearing hardly anything. I toss her the money and take the flower.
The blue flower surprisingly looks nice next to the red rose I decide.
"Hey kid, why don't ya get dressed and come with me down to the Union Headquarters?" Raven asks, and I blush as he sees me arranging the two flowers next to the picture.
"No thanks…" I say softly, and the old man kinda sighs when he realizes I'm a lost cause I guess.
I head down the water again and try skipping some stones. Someone offers me money to buy a jacket. A decline it. Just because I haven't changed my clothes doesn't mean I don't have any. It just means I don't care, which is the image I'm trying to present. I let my bare feet dangle into the water. It's freezing, not that it matters though-I'm already sneezing and coughing like crazy.
The day is short, and I find myself sleeping at 5 in the afternoon. Fine with me, my days didn't have that much purpose. I wake up twice to get sick though; I guess I'm catching something. I hope its cancer or something. That kills you, right?
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When I finally wake up at 10 in the morning, I immediately have to get sick again. I won't tell Raven though, cause he'll take me to the doctor and make it get better, but I'd rather have it get worse. Maybe I'll puke out my heart and die. Then I realize that can't really happen, cause my heart is already gone.
I fill up the bath, which gets water from the river. That means it's cold, which doesn't matter, because I'm always frozen, I hardly even notice. I throw off my clothes and sink in. The bath is kind of relaxing; I have to admit, as cold as it was. I poor some water over my hair and then comb it up all nice like it usually is. Then I get out and just sit there for a while.
I head out and pick a flower, sit by the river, everything the same. I go to sleep again with hopes that I might not see tomorrow. Was it bad to be wishing for that? At least I wasn't wishing Yuri would come back. I don't like wishing for the hopeless.
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2 weeks passed, and everything was the same. I got sick multiple times a day, but it seemed to be nothing but a bad cold or the flu.
The flowers were piling up next to the picture, and I was running out of money buying them all.
I head to take a bath again, the cool water feeling nice against my now pale skin. I hadn't realized how pale it was until I looked in the mirror after getting out of the bath. Did the cold do this? Or was I already basically dead?
I toss on some shorts and a t-shirt and prepare to go for a swim.
Before that though, I decide to stop by the flower shop and pick up the nicest flower I could find. Then I found it, a beautiful white flower that the lady there said was used as a symbol for hope. I stick this one into my hair so I don't lose it; I was giving this flower to Yuri personally.
Then I head to the water. The beautiful, freezing water that seemed to glisten. Maybe heaven was down there, waiting for me. No doubt, if I swam across this river I would reach heaven. Heaven was waiting for me after death.
"I'm coming Yuri" Tears are pouring, but the water washes them away. Am I dreaming? Everything was blurry. My breath was running out. Just like the dream before, only this time, after I faint, Yuri will be waiting for me.
Only, I open my eyes, and I'm glancing at Dahngrest. A deep pain is in my chest, and I should be lying on the hard floor. But I'm not. Someone is holding me in their arms, cradling me gently.
I'm dreaming. I know this, I have to be. My eyes are blurry. And then I see him. Well no, first I glance out and see a beautiful white flower drifting in the water. THEN, I see him smiling at me. Is this heaven? No, it's better than heaven.
"You're awake?" He says, and I nod and latch onto him, crying onto his chest
"Yu-Yuri…?" I have to know this is real. I have to.
"Come on, let's go get you some warm clothes." I nod. Everything would be all right, I'll go back to the inn, get into some comfortable pajamas and curl up in bed. And Yuri will be there with me, and I'll hold onto him and cry, and tell him how much I missed him. I'll give him the flowers, well, most of them. Expect for the white one that drifted out into the sea. He had given me that one, because only Yuri could give me that little hope. This could all be a dream, but it's a dream that will continue on day after day without me ever wanting to wake up. I had reached heaven; only I didn't have to die to get there. I just had to live.
END OF FIC!!
End was technically how Yuri came back in the game, but I really didn't like how any of the characters welcomed him back (Except for Rita, she was totally in character Xd) I really wanted some more emotion from the other characters d:
Plzzz review
That was long for a one-shot I think. I could have made that into a multi chapter fic if I wanted, cause there's so much more I could have added. .
Anyway, thnx for reading, plz review .
