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Music Disclaimer: Lyrics used in this song are by Nick Lachey and no copyright infringement is intended.
Summary: John has been sentenced to two consecutive life terms in prison and away from the woman he loves. Trish is adapting to life without John, trying to stay strong for the sake of their newfound love. Can they survive the ultimate test to their relationship, one that neither of them expects or is prepared to fight?
Authors Notes: Welcome to book two in the series of books I have created. The first in the series was Bliss and you will need to read that story first in order to understand just how we got to where we are now. This story will also be named after a song and feature the lyrics in it. Any and all reviews and support are appreciated but are not mandatory. I am just happy that you all get to read what I love to write. Happy Reading!
Watch my life,
Pass me by
He walked the cell block, keeping his eyes downcast, watching his feet move one in front of the other, afraid to look up and find that what was now happening to him was really real. He didn't want to admit to himself that he was now in a maximum security prison and that the only attachment to the outside world he had was locked away inside his heart, for no one to see but him.
How had he ended up here and just what had he been thinking doing something as reckless as taking someone's car and running it down the streets the way he had. He should have known by now what damage that causes, two deaths were already on his conscience for that. To do it again though just made him feel sick to his stomach.
The knot had been there for days, threatening to take him down and make sure he never felt again but he forged on none the less. He may not like where he had to be right now and there were a million other places he could be, but only one of them meant something to him and he was sad that he couldn't be there now.
I wonder how she is holding up without me... he thought to himself as he remembered in his mind the way she had looked in the courtroom that day as the verdict had been read. They had prepared themselves for this in the case that it did happen but it didn't make it any easier to shake once the actual words were spoken,
The image of her that day was stuck in his brain, never letting him sleep, or do anything to keep his strength up. He was going to need it in here but he found that the will to fight had left him the minute he had walked away from Trish that day in the courtroom and it wasn't ever going to return until he saw her again.
Of that he was sure.
Flashback
"We the jury find the defendant, John Felix Anthony Cena...guilty on both counts of vehicular manslaughter in the untimely deaths of the two afore mentioned victims."
"NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!!!" Trish cried, grabbing onto John as tightly as she could, not wanting to believe that this was happening.
"Mr. Ramirez, get your client and the gallery under control or I will hold all of you in contempt of court." the judge boomed through the microphone attached to the bench he sat behind.
"Ms. Stratus you need to control yourself, this is a court of law young lady." the lawyer known as Ramirez said, making John almost seethe with anger. Just what had the man expected would happen? A party would break out when the damn verdict was read?
He knew what this was doing to her and he slowly pried her off of him and away from his arm but before he pushed her back down in the seat he spoke. "Wish please don't make this any harder then it already is. If you stay strong then I can too. I need you to do this for me honey please."
His words seemed to calm her enough that she sat back down and listened intently and quietly as the sentencing came next. When the life terms were announced, tears stinging her eyes and running black mascara down her face she was on her feet again.
John wanted to stop her from making a scene and getting into more trouble then she already was but he also knew there was no way he could not when she was fighting for what the two of them shared and the thoughts of now losing it.
"What the hell is wrong with you people? Two life sentences? By the time he gets out he won't even have a life to live. That is if he gets out! How can you people do this to him, to us, to what we might have had?"
She broke down into the seat then and Shawn and Hunter, who had made the trip to be there for him had to escort her out. As he watched her form walking from the courtroom he realized this was going to be the last time he would ever see her for a long period of time, and all he could see was her walking away from him.
End Flashback
Had that last image of the woman he loved walking from the courtroom mean something in the grand scheme of things? Did it mean that in walking away he would never see her again? Could their love really survive this much agony?
"Welcome to Cell Block D. This here is your new living quarters for the next twenty five to life." the guard said as he pointed into the dark and dank cell that was now to become John Cena's new home. As he looked at the cracked brick walls and the bunk bed that was situated there, the sheets stained with what looked like old blood, he realized that this was the final straw. He was now a prisoner and life would never be the same again.
As the guard walked away from the cell whistling some tune that John had never heard of, he flopped down on the lower bunk and closed his eyes. He had never been in this place before, not prison because well he had never been here either, but this place of total darkness and confusion and hopelessness. He was alone, more alone then he had ever been in his life and he knew he had no one to blame but himself. So he did the only thing he could think of in that moment and he looked to the ceiling and with tears stinging the corners of his eyes he prayed for the first time in his life.
"God grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage to change the things I can and the wisdom to know the difference. Please God look after Trish because more then helping me right now she needs you for so many other reasons. She can't do this alone anymore and neither can I. Make our love strong. Amen."
He drifted off into slumber then, the only thoughts occupying his mind as he did was the sound of Trish's voice when she had told him for the first time that she loved him, and the look on her face when he had said it back. Their love was pure and it was strong and as sleep set in instantly he knew they would get through this...they just had to believe.
