A/N: Hey people. I decided to start another story that I had an idea to start. this is sort of like one of those 'Keitaro snaps' fics. I pretty much planned this story out entirely. Please Review.
Lessons
Chapter 1: Nobody is indestructible
Keitaro was having an off day. When he got back from Cram School, he recieved Su's traditional greeting. That was not the bad part. The bad part was that he landed right on top of Mutsumi. Unfortunately, Motoko was coming around the corner to go to the kitchen. All she saw was Keitaro on top of Mutsumi. "URASHIMA! YOU VILE MALE! VIOLATING POOR OTOHIME-SAN! YOU'LL PAY FOR THIS!" she shouted.
"Wait, Motoko-chan! I can explain! I..." Keitaro panicked, trying to explain.
"SECRET TECNIQUE: AIR SPLITTING SWORD!" Motoko said, hitting him with a ki attack that sent him flying straight into the kitchen...
...Right on top of Shinobu.
"AAAAAAAAAAAAAHHH! S-Sempai! Wh-What are you doing?" Shinobu asked after shrieking.
"So sorry, Shinobu-chan. Motoko hit me with a ki attack that sent me flying into the kitchen," Keitaro said as he tried to get up. Unfortunately, before he could, Naru came in, responding to Shinobu's shriek.
"Shinobu-chan, what's wr..." Naru said before charging at Keitaro, who managed to get up before what she said next. Keitaro could see her red aura of anger before the "KEITARO! YOU PERVERT!" that she shouted as she sent him into orbit with her patented Naru Punch.
"GAAAAAAAAH!" he yelled as he was sent flying over Hinata City, Tokyo, Kyoto, and onto Okinawa, in Mutsumi's home's front lawn.
One minute earlier, Otohime Residence, front lawn...
Natsumi Otohime, mother of Mutsumi Otohime, was on a lawn chair with a table of watermelons on her left, a huge box of them on her right, and an umbrella covering her face in shade.
"Ahhhh..." she sighed. She was calm. She closed her eyes until she heard screaming. That's when Keitaro crashed into the box of watermelons, effectively covering the surrounding lawn in juiced watermelon, including Mrs. Otohime.
Back to the present...
Keitaro groaned. He was covered in watermelon and looking at a face covered in watermelon. "Ara, who are you?" the face asked him.
"Sorry, ma'am. I am Keitaro Urashima. Wait...are you Mutsumi-chan's mother?" he asked.
"Oh! Kei-kun! I knew you were familiar! And yes, I am Mutsumi-chan's mother," she said. What are you doing all the way out here?"
"Naru-chan punched me after a crazy series of misunderstandings involving all of the other tenants," he replied.
"Do they do that every day?" Natsumi asked.
"Yes,"
"Then why don't you evict the mean ones?"
"I can't do that! They have nowhere else to go! Plus, they're my friends!"
"Ara, it seems like they are not very friendly."
"They always misconceive the situations I find myself in. I'm really clumsy."
"Ara, it doesn't seem like they learned their lesson."
"..."
"Hello?"
"You're right. Granny asked me to help them get over their problems with boys. They still haven't done that."
"What are you going to do, then?"
"... I don't know yet."
"Okay. Do you need a ride home?"
"Thank you, Mrs. Otohime-san. I do need one."
"Okay. Let's go."
And so Natsumi and Keitaro went to the airport, where Natsumi paid for Keitaro's plane ride, after a debate between them.
Back at the Hinata Dorm, 3 hours later...
"Where is Kei-kun?" asked Mutsumi.
"I don't know. I thought he would be back by now," said Naru
"D-Do you think he left forever?" Shinobu asked, on the verge of tears.
"Don't talk like that, Shinobu-chan. Maybe he landed in Okinawa," Mutsumi said.
"Don't be ridiculous. I didn't hit him that hard. Besides, he's too nice to leave the dorm forever. He doesn't have the nerve," Naru responded to Shinobu.
"Then wh-why isn't he..." Shinobu tried to ask.
"I'M HOME!" Keitaro yelled.
"We can see that, Urashima," Motoko said with an eye roll.
"Sorry. Force of habit," he said, scratching the back of his head.
"Where did you land?" Naru asked.
"Okinawa. On Mutsumi's home's front lawn."
The girls turned to look at Naru with a look that said really?. "Didn't hit him that hard, eh?" Kitsune teased.
"Oh, come on, Keitaro-san. I didn't hit you that hard. If you landed in Okinawa, prove it," Naru said childishly.
"Well...I smell like watermelon, don't I?" Keitaro replied.
"Yeah, you do. It smells nice," Mutsumi said.
"Yeah, but why do you smell like watermelon?" Su asked.
"Oh, Mutsumi-chan's mother was sitting on a lawn chair with a huge box filled with watermelons...and then I crashed into the box and turned the watermelons into juice," he responded.
"Oh, I see," was most of their responses.
"Oh, COME ON, GUYS! You can't really believe he crashed into Okinawa!" Naru protested.
Keitaro then pulled out his plane ticket and placed it on the table. "Well, there's my plane ticket," he said. Even Naru had to believe him with the plane ticket. "Oh. Sorry. I only meant to send you to Tokyo." she apologized.
"Apology accepted, Naru-chan," he said. This surprised everyone. Keitaro then headed to his room next.
"Well, that was odd. Normally, he would try to insist that the whole thing was his fault," Kitsune noted.
"D-Do you think you made him mad, Naru-sempai?" Shinobu asked.
"Oh, please. He doesn't have the nerve."
(-).(-)
Keitaro sat at his desk, thinking of what he would do to help the girls learn their lessons when he was distracted by a knock on his door. "Come in," he said. The door opened and Kitsune stepped in. "Hey there, Kitsune," he greeted.
"Hey there, Kei-kun. I must say I feel like a good bottle of sake," she said.
"Don't you have some in your room?"
"No," she said sadly. "I finished it all..."
"...and you want me to buy you some?" he finished, humoring her.
"Actually, I was thinking of something else..." Kitsune said mischievously. She placed one of his hands on her chest and quickly took a picture. "There. That should be good for a month's rent. Bye." She pushed his hand off her breast and left while he was still sitting there dumbfounded.
'Woah. Déjà vu.' he thought.
Once he got over the shock, Kitsune's coming into his room to con him out of rent gave him an idea for a plan that he thought would work: He calls in a group of men that contradict their beliefs of him while he went on a vacation from his duties as manager. Each of the girls has their own group due to their different beliefs. A disciplinarian would come to make sure the girls didn't get out of hand with their treatment of their group of guys while also managing the dorm. 'Perfect,' he thought. 'All I need is a disciplinarian who fits the bill. Hmm...' He went through the list of names of people he knew to see if anyone fit his needs. He remembered Tsuroko from the time he was in Kyoto with Motoko. 'She does seem like the right person...I have to call her to see if she will accept the offer.'
(-).(-)
The next day, everyone was at the Breakfast table. They were all enjoying Shinobu's food. After all, the only reason she could not be on a cooking competition show was because she was under 16. Once she got the usual praise from the residents, she smiled at them. 'She's really nice. Kind of like Mutsumi-chan. They don't deserve the punishment the other girls get. And being here would certainly be just as much a punishment as what I have planned. Maybe I should ask them to come with me. Plus, I think Shinobu-chan wants it,' Keitaro thought.
"So, is anyone not going to be here for lunch? I need a head count," the blue-haired chef asked.
"I was going to my favorite bar to get a couple drinks. I actually got some money from the horse races this time," Kitsune said. Everyone sighed at this.
"I was going to train in the mountains for the weekend," Motoko said.
"I was taking Sarah out shopping for new clothes," Naru replied. Sarah nodded in agreement.
"I'll be here," Mutsumi said.
"I'll be here," Su added.
"I still have to repair that hole," Keitaro said, pointing to the hole in the kitchen from yesterday's big misunderstanding.
"Okay. Thanks, everyone," Shinobu said.
After breakfast, everyone went their seperate ways to their rooms to prepare for what they planned. Keitaro went to get his tool box and spare materials to repair the hole, Kitsune went to get her money, Motoko went to her room to start packing, Su went to her room to start on a new invention she had planned, Mutsumi went to the living room to take a nap, Naru went to get money for shopping, Sarah went to the door to wait for Naru, and Shinobu started doing the many dishes you would get if you had a house with eight people who all love your food.
(-).(-)
2 Hours later...
Keitaro finished repairing the hole in the kitchen wall in only 2 hours. 'Well, I have had a lot of practice in repairing this building, what with always getting sent through the walls by Naru, Motoko, and Su,' he thought. 'Which reminds me, I should make that call I've been planning,' he added.
With that, Keitaro made his way to his room, turned off the bug that he knew Su put in everybody's rooms, and made the call to Kyoto.
"Hello?" the person on the other end asked.
"Hi. It's Keitaro Urashima. You should remember me from last month."
"Yes, I do remember you, Keitaro-san. What is wrong?"
"I need your help. Almost none of these girls here have learned enough about men to cooperate with them. It's usually quite painful for me."
"I see. So you want me to teach them these things they lack, just like you said in that conversation a month ago in my home?"
"Yes."
"Which girls are on the list?"
"Well, there's Sarah-bozu, a nine-year-old who you could probably tell the problem of from the honorific, Kitsune-chan, who always uses her charms to swindle me out of a month's rent, Naru-chan, who always jumps to conclusions and uses her temper to hit me with a punch that sends me flying over Tokyo and sometimes Americad to some trust issues between us, Su-chan, who kicks me as a greeting and builds explosive machines that kill anyone other than me (I'm special that way) for fun, and Motoko-chan, who usually thinks that all men are the world's problems and 'protects' herself using Shinmei-ryü attacks."
"..."
"Hello?" Keitaro said.
"I see. I will be there by next Saturday. Is there anything else you need to tell me?"
"Yes. If you damage any of these girls in any way, I will turn your life into a living hell. And, depending on how seriously you hurt one of them if you did, you might not survive through it. Until that time comes to pass, if that time comes to pass, I bear you no ill will. If you hurt them in a way that sticks for the rest of their lives, yours won't be so long. Remember, we want to teach them, not hurt them. Are we clear?"
"Yes, Keitaro-san. I will not damage them for life, I will help them learn through any non-lethal tuition,"
"Good. Also, Su-chan will not be your responsibility in this matter. You see, Su-chan's problem is one with a solution that I can carry out. She only hits me with explosives and kicks to the face because I kind of have indestructibility. She just needs to be told that I don't see it as fun and she'll stop. She is just a little bit on the childish side. We'll, that's all. Thanks for this. See you next Saturday."
"Alright, you're welcome, bye."
"Bye."
Keitaro sighed. 'It is done,' he thought.