"That one will definitely become a problem" Kuja yelled as the dragon landed allowing him to get off. He had just came back from Burmecia and he couldn't believe that, the monkey boy was there! Zidane Tribal was alive? He couldn't possibly believe it!

"A huge problem!" Kuja cursed out loud as he retreated to his castle in the sand. "Damnit, what if he thwarts my plan?" He hugged himself as he walked in his room. "My beautiful plan" he said in a low voice "My beautiful sexy plan… just like me" he looked in the mirror and smiled.

His room was rather large with purple and pink ribbons going from wall to wall. In front of him was a huge mirror which he examined himself in almost everyday. The man walked closer to the mirror with a soft smile on his lips.

"Sir we have something to tell you" Zorn blurted out as he walked through the door and jumped up.

"Something to tell you we have!" Thorn jumped up mimicking Zorn.

"Yes!?" Kuja roared.

"We are ready to leave for Cleyra."

"Ready to leave for Cleyra we are!"

"I'll be there when I'm ready thank you very much! And knock before you come in! That is very impolite!" Kuja glared at the twin jesters who only left the room and closed the door behind them.

Kuja sighed as he walked up to the mirror.

"I'm so beautiful…" Kuja smiled softly. "No one quite like me" Kuja almost drooled over himself as he become only millimeters away from his reflection. "You're so hot" Kuja whispered to himself… he closed the distance as he kissed the mirror and he imagined kissing himself…

"You're so beautiful." he trailed his fingers across the mirror and gave it a kiss one more time. "You are such a Vice, you sexy thing. It's a wonder how anything so beloved can exist. Like a dove surrounded by crows." He gave the mirror one more kiss and smiled

Kuja took a few steps back; he slowly took off his robe. He watched it slide down to reveal his bare chest, for a mage he had quite a nicely toned muscular build. He was more than just proud of it and he slowly put his fingers to touch it. His hands went down his ribs and he moaned.

The silver haired man walked closer to the mirror and gave it a small sweet kiss. He couldn't hold back he kissed 'himself' as he tried to grope the mirror image of him.

"The mages are rea-!"

"Ready to go ar-!"

Kuja tried to cover himself as the two twins stared in horror. "I!! SAID!! KNOCK!!!!!!!"