If only I could do it over, he thought to himself, his eyes stinging with the pain of what he could not express to those around him, the pain of his tears. The storm outside roared loudly enough to block out the sound of his sobs, it was the only reason Stephen hadn't come down yet to investigate the noise. And seeing his little brother would make him feel all the worse. After all, he killed her.
Damon pulled his knees tighter to his chest and his fingers tightened around the silk scarf -the silk scarf which had been Andie's. It still smelled like her, like scented shampoo and the perfume he had bought her, and was still stained with her blood. He didn't let Elena or Stephen know he had and taken it from her body when Stephen had killed her. Every night, he'd sit like this and take in her scent again, letting the memories of their nights together fill his mind. And sometimes, he let the tears fall.
The memories of his lost love still ached, even though it had been months since she had passed. He'd been at her funeral when they'd buried the body, and he'd managed to pass by the graveyard everyday to see if... Well, he didn't even know what he was hoping to happen.
Lightning flashed outside and Damon shifted on his bed so he was facing away from the great picture window. Andie had loved looking out that window, she had loved the view just outside the Salvatore house. Sometimes, she would tell him about the magical adventures she used to have when she was a girl here in Mystic Falls and how the forests used to be her favorite place to play. To her, it was full of possibilities and light, everything that was far beyond her reach now. She had managed to love him, the biggest accomplishment any of his compelled girls ever lived up to. She found a way to genuinely find feelings for him, and he had fallen just as hard for her.
Thunder followed soon, and Damon wanted to scream. It seemed like the storm outside was trying to interupt his self pity, the only time he could reflect on how bad a person he had come to be. It was the only time he mourned the people who had died for him, the people who had truly loved, because as he had learned long ago, the people who loved him always died. If only I could do it over, he thought, bringing the scarf to his face and taking in her scent. If I could do one thing over, just let it be her.
He didn't know when he fell asleep, he must have been more exhausted than he thought from crying. Light was shining through the window, bright and too happy for his taste. The compulsion to pull of his ring and let the misery end bubbled up at the back of his mind, but he could never do it. He'd wanted to before, and knew it would be selfish of him to take his life when all the people who had the right were deep underground.
Suddenly, rage roared to life in his stomach and made his head throb. The world had no right to be as happy as it was, it should suffer like how he suffered. He flung the comforter off him and stormed to the window, grabbing the heavy drapes and pulling it so hard the fabric almost ripped.
"What are you so grumpy about? Its a lovely day, I don't think even you could hate happiness this much." A voice purred with sleepy amusement behind him.
A sense of betrayal slithered down his throat and roped around his stomach. There was only one woman who dared to show up in his bed like this. It could only be Katherine back to taunt him and tune the frayed strings of his heart by tearing them further.
Damon was careful not to move for a second after the reply before moving at vampire speed to his bed to attack his unwanted guest but the face he saw there made him fall to his knees. A raw feeling at the back his throat mingled with the feeling of tears in his eyes. He felt hollow, like someone had just pulled out every part of him, leaving only the water to pool out his eyes.
"What's with that reaction?" Andie asked, perplexed.
"Y-You can't be..." he sniffed and wiped at the tears in his eyes. "You have to be a ghost, right? Back to haunt me for all the wrongs I did... And God, I fucking deserve it!"
"What are you going on about? I'm right here." she picked up one of his pillows and threw it at him. "Does that feel real enough?"
The heavy pillow thumped against his chest before falling to the floor. "For your pathetic throw, yes." He smiled, picking it up and moving slowly to the bed, as if she might disappear at any moment. As if it weren't her.
But the closer he got, the more he could smell her scent. Her artificial shampoo and the fading perfume, the one in the round glass bottle she kept next to the sink. She was here.
It took every drop of self control he had not to run to her and scream and cry and love her like he would have done if he had known she would be gone. As he got closer, it got harder and harder to move, yet he kept walking. His heart felt like it was being constricted and pulled right out of his chest, like he'd done to others. He would deserve that as punishment.
And finally, when he was hovering over his bed, he couldn't help himself. Roughly, he grabbed her face between his hands, and held it like it might slip out between his fingers. She looked at him with puzzled eyes but that made him all the more happy, that those lovely milk chocolate eyes of hers could hold emotion when the last time he had seen them, they were dull and lifeless. "I love you," he rushed out, salty tears pooling in his eyes and spilling down his cheeks, "I love you so much, Andie."
"Damon, what's wrong? Did you have a bad dream or something? Wait, can vampires even dream...?" she replied between squished cheeks.
"No, I... I just lived a very bad reality." he said, leaning his forehead against hers. "And now that I have you back, I'm not letting you go again." Damon leaned in to kiss her lips, his touching her soft lips in a gentle kiss at first, but his hunger for her which he had been forced into a small corner of his mind - resurfaced. His large hands moved to cup the back of her hand, the other traveling down her back, tickling her spine, before cupping her bottom and giving a soft squeeze.
She returned his fervent kiss, playfully nipping at his bottom lip, those brown eyes of hers shining with mischief and lust. Andie's own desire took a hold of her, and she ran her unoccupied hands down the hard curves of his body. She stopped at his hips and gave a playful squeeze as his longing, hot fiery passion, traveled down south.
He would have to up his game.
Damon moved his body onto the bed, engaging her with his larger body. He took his hands away from her head and rear, sliding them up to her hips. Getting a firm grip, he ground her against his aching member. She moaned between their needy kiss and moved her hands up to his chest, balling up the fabric - she wanted it gone.
Without needing another indication, he broke off their kiss and pulling his shirt over his head. She followed suit, leaving her fleshy breasts only protected by her white lace bra.
Damon pushed her down into the mattress, one hand holding him up by her head, the other resting on her hip. He moved his lips down her throat, his stubble scratching her skin the way she liked, and continued down to her collarbone, where he sucked a small patch of skin. But he didn't stop, he moved further down to her breasts and placed a small kiss between the small mounds. With his hand, he unclipped her bra, setting free the twin flesh mounds and they almost seemed to sway in delight at their freedom, the tiny buds appearing and tempting him.
It didn't last long, for Damon was starving for her body. His mouth encircled one of the tiny buds which had popped up from exposure, and he sucked mercilessly on it. The other bed was pinched and prodded by his hand, tugged and groped as well. Andie responded with moans and shrieks of delight. Her hips came up and rubbed against him in ecstasy and a small growl of pleasure vibrated in his throat. No going back now.
Abruptly, he hooked his fingers under her pants and underwear and tugged them off, leaving her desire bare before him. She frowned at him before tugging off his, careful to maneuver around the throbbing erection. For a bare moment, they stayed like that, naked in their lust and everything else, but then, their cravings took hold, and neither could stand it.
Damon made a space for himself between her legs, the slender limbs wrapping around his waist in a show of affection. With experienced fingers, he felt her core and felt another shiver of pleasure adding to his member, she was beyond wet, like she had craved him as long as he had her.
"D-don't tease me," she moaned, feeling his fingers gently prodding her.
He smirked, but obeyed her command. He repositioned himself above her, and slowly brought his aching erection against her womanhood, moving himself inch by inch inside her walls.
"Damon!" she shouted on the cusp of lust. Andie moved her hips and forced the rest of him inside, earning a growl of pleasure from Damon, feeling her whole being wrapped so tightly around his. "Don't make me do all the work."
"Shut up," he teased, kissing the hollow of her throat. Slowly, he built up a torturous pace, making him want to just fuck her senseless there, but he couldn't. He wanted to make this last.
Sweat formed around his temples and it also formed along Andie's neck and down between her breasts. Andie's back curved up with each low thrust of his. Her fingers dug into his shoulder and tugged at his raven hair. She was enthralled by him, lost in the deep forest of desire that was their conjoined sex. Her hips moved with his until neither of them could take it anymore and he went off his rhythm, moving to his own beat just like how her heart beat so quickly from excitement. It was one of Damon's favorite things to feel her heart beat when it was so rapidly beating.
And before they knew it, they had reached their climax, their voices entwining together with satisfied desire and love. He collapsed next to her and held her small, sweaty body beside his own. He felt tired, but also content that in this way, it was almost like saying the good bye he never could.
The next morning, Damon awoke to an empty bed. His skin salty from being covered in sweat. The only thing he felt was tired and satisfied, and he had no idea why. A sense of wrong gave his mouth a bad taste, but he couldn't figure out what it was.
He stood up and headed to the bathroom, to hopefully get rid of the taste in his mouth. He had no idea that just outside the room, Stephen breathed a sigh of relief. The potion he had gotten from Klaus had worked, Damon had forgotten Andie.