chapter 1.
There came a ragged breath. She heard it, and a small smiled curved on her lips and into the neck of the person she drank deep from. This was a moment alone, hard fought for. A whispery intake of breath was enough to confirm she'd been right to take it.
"Is this okay?" She murmured, pressing a lazy kiss to a lily-white neck, freckle covered and sweet smelling. Her companion appeared to force a swallow, an attempt to gather herself.
"Yes." The reply was soft, only semi-strangled. "Hermione, we shouldn't. Harry and the others are out there, we said we'd only be gone for a moment."
She was right of course. Her fingers interlocked with Ginny's and she placed a soft, light kiss on her paramour's yielding lips.
"Okay. I suppose I just couldn't help myself," A hand unlocked itself and dragged upwards, across buttons and soft material. "We can go back whenever you're ready."
An impetuous moan in response: the redheaded girl pulled her lover back in for another kiss. This one came in fast and hard, and was over as soon as it started.
"You're mean, you know." Ginny said, her tone mock acrid and a smile quirking her lips. She exited the bathroom stall, her eyes darting back to meet Hermione's before she disappeared, her long copper-red hair whipping out behind her and leaving Hermione dazed in a fog of coconut perfume.
She sank down to sit on the loo. She can't believe she just snogged Ginny bloody Weasley in some backwoods petrol station while their friends waited patiently outside. She didn't quite feel like herself, like Hermione Granger: bookish and outspoken, thoughtful and unselfish – a right swot sometimes. She hadn't felt like her for quite some time if she was honest. Not since her and Ginny had run into each other by chance one night and shared a night of intense and singular design.
She almost wanted to laugh right there at the thought of it. She'd always known she wasn't straight, not really one thing or the other really. But Ginny Weasley? She could have never anticipated falling into bed with her best friend's very complicated ex girlfriend. It definitely violated a boundary, and Hermione's own seemingly meticulous moral code; but then why did it feel so good?
Hermione felt guilty for not feeling guilty. Instead she felt exhilarated, she felt reborn. All her years of study and copious amounts of learning ensured she had never really had something quite like this. Two bachelors degrees later, and she was still happily single. Of course there had flings, distractions really. They'd been momentary and delicious, but distractions none the less. Ginny Weasley was so unexpected, the way she'd seeped into Hermione's pores and filled her head with this smile like sunlight, milky skin and a razor-sharp wit. All Hermione could do was thank her lucky stars it was summer break and she already had been granted entry into Honours, because this distraction was proving to be more overwhelming than any she'd previously indulged.
A car honked outside, and it jerked Hermione out of her sinful musings. She jumped to her feet and exited the cubicle, quickly splashing her flaming cheeks with cold water from a stainless steel sink and checking her reflection in a scratched foggy mirror. The sun cooked her as soon as she stepped out of the dinky bathroom, and she was met with her friend's impatient heckles as well as a painful reminder that she needed to reapply sunscreen.
"Did you fall in? Come on, we've got to get a move on before we lose too much light." Ron grumbled from the open door of the cramped van, where he was busily shovelling a chocolate bar into his mouth.
"Relax, Ronald. It's barely four; we have another six hours of light and half hour before we reach the national park. Do the math." She retorted, and he proceeded to perform a rather good impersonation of Hermione to Luna, who was stretched out next to him in the back. Hermione rolled her eyes while Luna pursed her lips in attempted disapproval, but fell into a giggle anyway. A noticeable flush of pleasure spread across Ron's face.
"Alright kids, settle down back there. Boy Scout Harry will guide you all to camp, be it light or dark." Harry was languidly resting an arm over the steering wheel, and waggled his eyebrows at Hermione as she got into the passenger seat next to him.
"God, I hate it when you talk in third person mate." Ron groaned from the backseat.
"Also, have you forgotten I was in Scouts with you? I helped you put out a small electrical fire more than once if I recall, I'm not sure you're equipped to lead us anywhere." Hermione crossed her arms and looked at him amusedly.
"Oi, the driver will accept no criticisms from you lot. Only snacks." Harry met Ron's eyes expectedly in the rear view mirror.
"Fresh out, I'm 'fraid." Ron sheepishly licked a streak of chocolate from his finger and indiscreetly scrambled to hide the evidence, burying the wrappers under his legs. Harry huffed, and noticed a tall figure walking back towards the car after exiting the sliding doors of the petrol station. Hermione suddenly busied herself by rifling through her backpack to look for her sunglasses.
"Gin, what did you get?" Harry called out; squinting at the plastic bag the redhead was swinging in her hand.
"Water." Ginny ducked to clamber into the back of the van, earning Ron's displeased protestations as she pushed past him to sit in the centre seat, nestling between her brother and her best friend, shooting her a knowing look as Luna shuffled closer to the window and began to stare purposefully out the window.
"Boring water!" Harry groaned, and Ginny playfully kicked the backseat.
"Yeah, if you call hydration boring Potter." She retorted, and he chuckled in response.
"God Gin, you're beginning to sound like Hermione. Promise me we won't stay hydrated once we make camp tonight." He pleaded, and everyone in the van laughed. Harry had convinced Hermione to let him pack enough wine to drown a small village.
"Well for those of us who want to enjoy a nice summery drink, I brought ingredients to make sangria!" Hermione piped up, turning to face Harry and the three seated in the back. Ron noticeably lit up at that. Harry started the van and pulled out onto the highway.
Hermione's eyes sordidly slipped to the beautiful girl seated behind her, and suppressed a smile when Ginny's doe-like eyes met hers. She couldn't help regarding her, present company be damned. Long, coppery hair tumbled over her shoulders and down her back. She wore a short-sleeved button down, green and so lovely against her soft freckly skin. Her warm brown eyes swam with intelligence and kept darting away shyly from Hermione's admittedly heated gaze. She never expected to be so ready to pursue Ginny, but it was almost as though they had been waiting for this the entire time they'd known each other. There had been glances of appreciation, mostly in response to something smart and cutting one of them said to the boys, but there was something that ran a little deeper. Hermione had never been able to put her finger on why she felt disjointed in Ginny's presence. She'd chalked it up to feeling intimidated by Ginny. It was only logical – women were put in competition with each other constantly, and Ginny was as smart as she was beautiful; she had a sea of admirers that attested to this fact. Hermione had retreated a little, attempted to work on herself and what she convinced herself were the feelings of jealousy every time she saw Ginny laughing on Harry's arm, kissing his cheek or flirting unabashedly.
And it was jealousy. Hermione just didn't know it wasn't directed at Ginny.
Her phone buzzed impatiently, and Hermione twisted around to push her hips upwards and slide it out of the pocket of her denim shorts. She clicked the home button and immediately tilted the screen away from Harry, despite him being distracted by the road and the Radiohead album he'd had on replay most of the trip (something about Thom Yorke's genius in his earlier work, but Hermione would've honestly preferred Beach House).
don't, i cant focus when you look at me like that.
She forced her lips not to quirk as she typed a response.
You make it hard. Surprised you had the gall to type that out and send that sitting between your brother and Luna.
She continued to hold back the smile she knew would be a dead give away if Harry so much as glanced at her. No one smiles at their phone while getting texts unless it's from someone special. And Harry would never let her hear the end of it if he thought there was someone in her life. She was a crummy liar and he knew it, there was only a matter of time until he'd find out. That was when things had the potential to get really ugly. It was already idiotic that she'd agreed to go on this camping trip to a national park in Yorkshire with the group, which included Ginny and Ginny's ex, who happened to be best friends with not only Hermione but also Ginny's older brother. Hermione knew Ginny had begged Luna to come with her, making up some half-lie about feeling awkward about being in such close proximity to Harry after their break up a few months ago, amicable though it was. It was less to do with Harry and more to do with Hermione; Ginny couldn't seem to help herself around the wild-haired girl, and that was a recipe for disaster. Luna had dreamily agreed, before inquiring if Ron would be joining. Hermione couldn't help noticing Luna was a little distracted by her task of keeping Ginny preoccupied, glancing in Ron's direction with a sweet little smile every so often. Ron would notice occasionally and go beet red at the ears.
God, their group was dysfunctional.
well ur familiar with how quick my fingers can be arent u?
As soon as she read the text, Hermione slapped her phone facedown on her thigh with such force that it caused a loud smack. Harry noticed and glanced at her with a puzzled expression.
"You alright Hermione? You've gone a little red," Harry seemed genuinely concerned, passing her a water bottle. "Gin's right, hydration is key."
Hermione smiled wryly, accepting it before shooting daggers at Ginny over her shoulder, who smiled smugly in response. Yeah, I'm fine, just exchanging saucy texts with your ex, who oh yeah, is sitting right behind us. She kept that intoxicating thought to herself, and sloshed back some admittedly lukewarm water.
This was the most reckless and thoughtless thing Hermione had ever engaged with in her life. She was standing at the edge of an abyss without a parachute, or a lifejacket, or even a goddamned helmet. She'd never welcomed the dark unknown with such abandon and felt giddy and sick at the thought of free fall. Ginny was a wild card; she knew it from the moment she laid eyes on her. Maybe that's why she dove in.
oo
Harry pulled into the car park at the edge of the national park at the time that Hermione had roughly estimated they would. A stickler for details, she had packed the entire van and organised for everyone to meet at Harry's with their packs four hours earlier. It had been a surprisingly quick drive from Cambridge to Yorkshire. Having summered in France and even as far as Australia, Hermione was no stranger to long car rides and often forgot how small her own country was. Part of her goal this year was to set out to see more of England, and summering locally was part of that. The others had been more than eager to blow off some steam after a hectic semester, the last for most of them, and Harry took the initiative and borrowed his uncle's van. The national park had always been on Hermione's list, famous for its beauty and climbing spots. Hermione was excited to hike and see the sights – and as Ginny bent over to pick up her pack, she realised just how much of that she'd be getting. Clearing her throat hurriedly, she began to address the group.
"Alright, then. Everyone grab your pack, it shouldn't be a long walk to the campsite but remember there are two bottles of wine-"
"Three bottles of wine!" Harry interrupted, and Hermione shot him a baffled look.
"Fine, there's three bloody bottles of wine in each of your packs. Really, Harry, two wasn't enough?" She hissed as she swatted the boy's arm. "I find it so hard to believe you're a graduate, what in the hell is the ruddy Bar going to do with you?"
"Probably drink with me, surely you're aware by now that all lawyers are wretched old drunks?" Harry shot back with a cheeky grin, and Hermione rolled her eyes and supressed a grin.
Hermione helped Luna getting her pack onto her shoulders – the poor thing was a head shorter than her – but once it was on, she didn't struggle. For such a small frame she carried eleven kilograms like it was nothing.
"You know, I see how you look at each other." Luna murmured as Hermione adjusted her own pack. Hermione shot a panicked look behind her, and was relieved to see Harry, Ron and Ginny having some sort of loud competition to see who could topple the other over first.
"Um. I'm not sure what you mean Luna." Hermione stated delicately, her voice decidedly tight. Luna simply smiled vacantly in response, but her eyes were far sharper than the dreaminess her voice and mannerisms let on.
"Yes, you do. I'm just saying you should be careful. There's a little more at stake here than your feelings for one another." Hermione nearly opened her mouth to tell Luna to mind her own bloody business, but promptly shut it once she thought better of it. Before she'd even had a chance to formulate any kind of response, Luna had already drifted off to follow the others, who had began to totter off in the direction of a path hooded with tall thin trees. Hermione strode behind them, hoping Harry was clutching the map she'd marked and thrust into his hands. Of course, she'd committed the route to memory during the trip there, but there wasn't much she could do so far behind the fray.
Hermione listened to her friends laugh with each other, and smiled softly. She'd hoped this trip would be an opportunity for everyone to unwind, including for herself. It had been a gruelling last semester, and she deserved to cut loose a little. She deserved Ginny, an ugly little voice inside her suggested. She amended her thought: no one deserved Ginny, especially since she had just broken up with her long-term boyfriend. Perhaps Luna was right, she mused dejectedly. Although not heartbroken, Ginny was vulnerable. Their feelings were clearly mutual, and while they hadn't declared them outright, Hermione couldn't expect anything from someone who'd been through a break up so recently. This was one situation where Hermione hoped she could let her heart take the lead instead of her head. But the circumstances were off, and she couldn't be selfish. Hermione knew she needed talk to Ginny as soon as they were alone, and respectfully back off, for a time at least. They couldn't exactly continue their heated back and forth at a campsite with all their friends at any rate.
The brunette was so caught up in her thoughts she nearly ignored the hairs on her beck that had suddenly raised. She paused, licking her lips nervously and furrowing her brow. Even though she couldn't see another soul, let alone hear one over her friend's caterwauling, she had the distinct feeling she was being watched. More than that, it was like she herself was being closely observed. She tried to calm her rising heart rate as her eyes darted between the trees, desperately seeking confirmation that there wasn't some strange creature regarding her with near predatory intent. Her mind told her she was being irrational, there was nothing there and it was silly to even entertain this anxiety. Something deep within her however, a secret so alive it was begging to be unlocked, was whispering that this felt wrong. She could barely describe it, except possibly as some enhanced fight or flight response.
"Hermione! Come on, you're so far behind! Make a move or you won't have the pleasure of helping us set up camp." Harry called out from the top of hill she realised she was at the base of. Hermione looked up at him rather blankly and managed a shaky thumbs up, which he raised an eyebrow at and turned on his heel.
Hermione tried to shake off the feeling of dread that had begun to overwhelm her senses. She was being silly, having a panicky moment after a period of heightened stress. It's natural but not helpful or necessary, she reasoned as she made her start up the incline.
There was no way Hermione Granger was to know how much she would come to regret trudging up that hill and deeper into the national park.