Written for LiveJournal's Saiyuki drabble community 100_roadtrips' challenge #267, Mission: Impossible. Not beta-reviewed; all mistakes are mine.
The Impossible Dream
Hakkai's list of impossible things:
Preventing Goku and Gojyo from going after the last potsticker at the same time.
Keeping Sanzo or Gojyo happy in the face of a cigarette shortage or, worse yet, a complete lack of cigarettes.
Getting where they want to go if they push Jeep too hard. This is why he braves Sanzo's ire to insist on staying put when Jeep needs to recuperate.
Convincing Gojyo that flirting with every pretty girl within eyesight is not a good idea.
All four of them surviving the mission. He suspects Sanzo agrees with him on that last point.