Hi! MyFangirlingWays here! So this is my first song whatchyacallit story and first angst/hurt, too! Which is weird 'cause I'm all about humor. Anyway, hope it's not too OOC and that you enjoy! :)
REVIEW AND TELL ME YOUR THOUGHTS, PLEASE! I LIKE KNOWING WHAT YOU THINK AND I ALWAYS REPLY :D
For those waiting for my update on "All The Reasons Why": Sorry, XD this got me a bit side-tracked. I just really wanted to try it out. :)
Disclaimer: You all know if I owned Fairy Tail Natsu and Lucy would already be making babies.
She felt so cold.
Opening her eyes, she turned around on the bed to see that Natsu had his own back to her, facing the wall. He had made it so they were as far apart as the bed allowed.
Lucy felt her heart ache a bit, though this was not a new occurrence. Not bothering to go back to sleep, she quietly got up and left to the kitchen. Lucy turned on the kettle and waited for it to heat up. She took a cup down from the cupboard, put in some grinder coffe, and poured in the hot liquid when it was ready.
Sighing, Lucy picked up the mug and walked towards the table, taking a seat and drinking it in silence. She heard footsteps and a few seconds later Natsu appeared. The blonde looked away, unwilling to meet his eyes and took a small sip of her coffee.
A cold, uncomfortable silence fell between the two. Neither made an attempt to break it.
"I'm off," Natsu said, leaving the kitchen with a bagel in one hand and headed towards the door. She nodded, though it was pointless.
He was already gone.
Squeezing her eyes shut, Lucy willed her tears away. She wouldn't cry. Not again. She should be used to this already. It had been the normal routine for the past few weeks.
Right from the start
You were a thief
You stole my heart
And I your willing victim
Standing up, Lucy walked to her desk, leaving her breakfast. She had decided. She took out a paper and a pencil.
'I can't do this anymore.'
I let you see the parts of me
That weren't all that pretty
And with every touch you fixed them
With a trembling hand, she began to write.
Natsu, you know I love you. I always have and I always will.
But things have changed. We've been ignoring it, and I can't handle it anymore...I just don't think we're meant for each other. I think it's time we face the truth and
Against her wishes, a teardrop fell, staining the paper. Lucy quickly wiped away any remaining tears and continued.
go our seperate ways. Please, we can always be friends. This...I hope this doesn't change our relationship. If it does, it will be for the better.
A choked sob escaped from her and Lucy dropped the pencil, unable to hold it in any longer.
Now you've been talking in your sleep, oh, oh
Things you never say to me, oh, oh
Tell me that you've had enough
Of our love, our love
After her tears came to a stop, she picked up the pencil and finished her letter.
I'm sorry, but please realize that I'm doing this for us...I just don't want to hurt you anymore. I don't want to hurt anymore.
Forgive me for my selfishness.
Lucy
She stared at the paper in her hand, a numb feeling running through her. Steeling her back, she rose from her seat and left the letter where she was sure he'd find it; on the kitchen table. Lucy hesitantly placed a hand on it, tracing his name with her fingertips.
"What're you doing?" Lucy's head and hand shot up, as if she was caught. There, in the entrance of the kitchen was the pink-haired boy she used to love.
She stammered, taking a step back. "I-I thought you were going somewhere."
Natsu shrugged. "Didn't feel like it, so I came back. What's that?" He pointed at the paper. Lucy reached out to hide the letter, but he was there first, lifting it up to read.
"Wait! Natsu—"
"You were gonna leave?" His voice was emotionless, his back stiff and turned away from her.
"N-Natsu, I can explain—"
"You were gonna leave." This time, it was a statement. For the third time that day, tears sprung into her eyes. She didn't bother trying to get rid of them, though.
"Yes." He abruptly turned to look at her, his eyes dark and piercing.
"Why?"
Just give me a reason
Just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
"You've already read about it."
"I know what this says!" He shouted, crumpling the paper in his fist. He lit it ablaze and soon it was nothing but ash. Surprised by his sudden outburst, Lucy stepped back, her eyes wide. If he saw the fear in her eyes, he didn't show it. "I want you to tell me in person how you feel."
"Natsu..."
It's in the stars
It's been written in the scars on our hearts
We're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
"There's just no more...I don't feel anymore..." She trailed off, unsure of what to say. The blonde dropped her head, tears streaming down her face. All of a sudden, she felt a strong, calloused hand tilt her chin up gently. She found herself looking into a pair of dark, onyx eyes. So many emotions swirled within their depth and Lucy shut her own eyes.
"Luce..."
I'm sorry I don't understand
Where all of this is coming from
I thought that we were fine
(Oh, we had everything)
Natsu cradled her face with his hands. "Lucy...open your eyes. Look at me...please," he pleaded, his voice breaking. He hated seeing her cry. Every tear that dropped from those beautiful eyes of her's was like a stab to his heart. "Please...tell me, Lucy..."
Your head is running wild again
My dear we still have everythin'
And it's all in your mind
"Natsu!" She snapped, breaking away from his embrace. Her eyes blazed with fury and so many other emotions Natsu couldn't name. "You know what's wrong! Th-this...this," she gestured wildly between them, "just doesn't work!" The stellar Mage finished with a huff. She calmed down, taking a deep breath. "We don't work."
"No." Natsu shook his head, unwilling to accept this. He attempted to get closer to her, to show her that they did. "That's not true."
(Yeah, but this is happenin')
You've been havin' real bad dreams, oh, oh
You used to lie so close to me, oh, oh
'It is,' he thought. 'But that doesn't mean I want it to be.'
"We're meant to be, Lucy," he argued weakly.
There's nothing more than empty sheets
Between our love, our love
Oh, our love, our love
"You're wrong, Natsu, and you know it." Lucy spoke quietly, crossing her arms and dropping her gaze. The fire in her dimmed to a glowing ember. "We're just not compatible with each other anymore. We've been in denial and it's time we finally accepted the truth." Her head lifted, those broken-hearted brown eyes tearing his very soul apart.
When did it all go wrong? Where did they go from being best friends to this? They used to be so happy together, enjoying every moment spent with one another.
"Lucy..."
"Natsu..."
Just give me a reason
Just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
"We can't just give up, Luce," Natsu pleaded. He reached a hand out to her, which she ignored.
Lucy shut her eyes, shaking her head, feeling her past anger growing once more. "You just don't get it, do you?" She yelled, the tears slipping past her closed lids. "We can't give up something we never had!"
I never stopped
You're still written in the scars on my heart
"Ever...ever since that fight we had three weeks ago, we grew distant," Lucy said. "Nothing's the same anymore, and I don't think it ever will be the same." She recalled back to that fated day; the insults they flung at one another and all the yelling. Eventually he had stormed out of the house and didn't return for the next couple of days. During that time, she had drowned her misery in tubs of ice cream and never ending tears.
You're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
"No!" This time, Natsu didn't wait for her permission; he marched forward and pulled Lucy—his Lucy—into his arms. Holding her by the shoulders, he gently shook her, hoping to knock some sense into her. "We can do this! We can make this work! W-we can't...we can't..." The pink-haired man tried desperately to show her they were okay, but how could when he didn't even believe himself?
Natsu felt warm drops of water running down his face.
Oh, tear ducts and rust
I'll fix it for us
We're collecting dust
"I'm so sorry, Lucy," he whimpered. "I-I was just so mad and jealous—"
"You had nothing to be jealous of, Natsu!" She argued, her fire returning. "You accused me of cheating on you just because some guy came up and hit on me! Do you know how much it hurts to see that your own boyfriend won't trust you?" Lucy glared up at him, remembering all the anguish he had caused her.
"I'm sorry! It's just, seeing you with that guy made me feel—I thought you were going to leave!" He defended himself. By the expression of shock on her face, he had revealed more than he should have. "I...I thought you were gonna leave me, Lucy..." He said in a hushed voice. Natsu searched her eyes, willing her to believe him.
"You're just so," he continued,showing her all his fears and vulnerabilities. "you're so perfect, Licy, and, and you could be with any guy you wanted, but you chose me." Cupping her face, he gazed deep within her beautiful eyes. "You chose me, even though I don't deserve you. I don't deserve you, but I want you. And that's why I get so jealous when I see you with other guys. I get so insecure and, and..." He closed his eyes.
After what seemed like an eternity, she spoke.
"I still can't forgive you. I'm sorry," she whispered.
"But—I—no—"
He couldn't find any more reasons.
But our love's enough
You're holding it in
You're pouring a drink
No, nothing is as bad as it seems
"I'm sorry, Natsu."
"I'm sorry, too, Lucy."
We'll come clean
Just give me a reason
Just a little bit's enough
Just a second we're not broken just bent
And we can learn to love again
Raising her hands, she placed them on his and pushed his grip off of her. She paused, looking deep within his eyes, those dark eyes of his that she used to love seeing. The same ones that used to hold such love and joy, the ones that instantly lit up whenever they were together. Now...now they were dull and lifeless. Lucy turned, preparing to leave.
It's in the stars
This is for you.
It's been written in the scars on our hearts
This is for me.
That we're not broken just bent
This is for us.
And we can learn to love again
"I'm sorry, Lucy..."
Just give me a reason
Just a little bit's enough
"but I won't let you leave."
Just a second we're not broken just bent
The blonde stopped dead in her tracks. Did he just—?
No. She continued on. It must've been her imagination.
And we can learn to love again
It's in the stars
"I won't let you go, Lucy," Natsu repeated, the statement firmer and louder this time. She froze.
It's been written in the scars on our hearts
"Natsu," she turned to him, her eyes watering for what felt like the hundredth time that morning. "Don't start this again, please, I beg of you."
That we're not broken just bent
He strode over to where she was, every movement confident and calculated. A familiar feeling rose up in her chest when she saw the determination and fire within the murky darkness.
"Please don't...Natsu." She held up her palms, as if trying to force him away without physically touching him. He kept coming, taking her hands into one of his own. He was right there. Right in front of her.
And we can learn to love again
She could smell his woodsy, outdoorsy kind of scent washing over her, his natural heat warming her coldness.
Natsu dipped his head, pressing his forehead against her's—the simple, what-used-to-be common gesture breaking her. Her head fell against his firm chest and she sobbed. She sobbed her whole heart out.
Oh, we can learn to love again
"Luce..." Her tears came down rapidly, soaking the shoulder of his shirt instantly. Her hands wriggled out of his hold and came up to clutch the fabric of his coat.
"W-why are you doing this?" She cried. "Why d-do you want to keep hurting me?"
"Because Lucy...I still...I still love you."
Oh, we can learn to love again
Natsu wrapped an arm around her small waist, enveloping the fragile girl in his strong embrace. "I still love you, Lucy Heartfillia." He bent his head, resting it on top of her's. The fire Mage lifted it back up when she raised her gaze to meet his.
She peered up at him beneath her golden lashes, examining him. He stared back, unabashed.
Oh, oh, that we're not broken just bent
Taking a shaky breath, he summoned up the rest of his courage and continued. "And I know we...you still love me too."
And we can learn to love again.
They say each other's name a lot...anyway...tell me what you think. :) I'm totally fine wth criticism.