AN: I felt like writing a song fic so I hope it's alright. I have 3 days before school starts and this whole summer, I didn't really write. I promise you guys I will again. I'll try my best to write more because I feel really bad about it. This one-shot is gonna be like a journal entry from Gwen expressing her love for Duncan before they became a couple. I might make a sequel to this but only if people like it. Also, I'm pretty sure the lyrics are right but do tell me if they aren't, okay? Italics are the song lyrics. I hope you all enjoy!
December 20th 2010(1)
Take time to realize,
That your warmth is
Crashing down on in.
Take time to realize,
That I am on your side
Didn't I, Didn't I tell you.
Here I am once again. I know I'll never get anywhere by just writing about it but I just have to get it off my chest. I cannot stand the sight of Duncan around Courtney anymore! Hell, they're around each other than Freddy and Christy(2)! That's a hell of a lot. It hurts me so much to think that Duncan would stay with such a manipulative bitch; to be blunt.
She really doesn't deserve him at this point because all she did was try to change him. Please Duncan, just understand that your love has taken it's toll on our friendship. I'm not sure how much longer I can deny these feelings I've been having about you. Think about it; I'm always the one there for you and I care so much for you so, obviously I'm on your side. Didn't I tell you before?
But I can't spell it out for you,
No it's never gonna be that simple
No I cant spell it out for you
I'm pretty sure you would know that but I hope you'll finally know that one day; even though I don't say it often. I wish you could see it from my point of view. You'd see how in the hallway at school, when you turn around from your "Princess", she would sending air kisses to Alejandro (AKA: the queen bitches boyfriend). I've seen it before but your so in love that I don't want to worry you about it. It's not like I can just tell you I've liked you ever since that day in English(3) when I first met you. It could have even been the day when you asked for my number!(4)
I just know that since April, I've been head over heels for you. I can't just come straight forward about it because I don't want to lose your friendship. It's a very clichéd thing in movies when friends become lovers because honestly, who believes in that crap? Same as with Courtney, it's not like I can tell you about her (as I suspect) secret affairs. I just want you to be happy.
If you just realize what I just realized,
Then we'd be perfect for each other
and will never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder if
we missed out on each other now.
Some days, I just dream about you and me. I wonder what it would be like if we were actually dating. We get along so well and I believe that we could last forever. If someone reads this one day, don't tell Duncan I said this but I've even dreamed of our wedding! That's our little secret though, okay? I've realized something- I think I'm in love with Duncan. I've never had this feeling before but I do think it's love.
I wonder if you'll grasp the fact that I'm going crazy over you. I have a feeling that if you ever do understand that, we'd be perfect for each other and only us. The best part is that we'd have a love stronger then most couples and we would never have to repeat the same cycle over and over again. Always looking for your soul mate that is. I believe that we are soul mates and we'd never miss out on each other if you feel the same way for me.
Take time to realize
Oh-oh I'm on your side
didn't I, didn't I tell you.
Take time to realize
This all can pass you by
Didn't I tell you
I think I'm starting to sound like Courtney. God, kill me for that! I just can't help the way I'm feeling for you. It's funny how love works; you know? I'm counting away at the time passing by on my clock. Each of these moments I wish I was spending with you instead of being at my house and writing in my journal the most intimate thoughts of my life. I'm just waiting until the day you'll break up with Courtney for good and date me.
Forgive me for sounding like a bitch but I just can't stand her. At school today, you know what she did? Now, I'm not one to gossip but I'd thought I would write down what happened during it so I won't forget. She openly (cross my heart and hope to die) claimed that she was only dating you for your money and how you lavish her because you love her so much. Her friends are just like her so being slutty whores, they laughed and agreed that she was so smart. That got me so pissed off that I almost told you. I didn't though because you had told me in History that today marks your one year anniversary and this would definitely ruin your day.
What a great girlfriend she is! She's not even on your side. She'll only stay until the money dries up. Oh, and if you can't tell; that was sarcasm. You need someone you can trust and Duncan, I believe that is me. I'm on your side forever; even when something is entirely your fault. All of the things Courtney did, well they can blow over I guess.
But I can't spell it out for you,
no it's never gonna be that simple
no I can't spell it out for you.
You are really in love with her so if she does happen to fall for you then, I hope you'll stay happy. Haven't I told you this before? I'm sure I have but I feel the need to confirm my beliefs. I probably will always hate Courtney no matter what you tell me but, I'll suck it up around her if that's what you please. I also feel like that no matter how many times I warn you about her, you just blow it off like it's nothing.
It isn't though. I can't spell it out for you! I've tried warning you but I'm just to timid to come out and tell you of the affair. It will never be that simple because I just can't risk my feelings accidentally slipping out when I tell you the truth. That would be risking our relationship and that's the last thing I'd do.
If you just realized what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realized what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder if
we missed out on each other now.
If you see it how I'd see it, then everything could be alright. Does she watch your favorite movies? Does she let you tell her all your favorite parts when you've seen it a million times? Does she sing to all you heavy metal music? Does she do all these things like I do?(5) I don't think she does so what do you see in her?
I have done all that with you and you still only see me as your best friend. One day, I hope I'll be more. Make that quick realization and we could have it all. Never would we have to look for better when we've found the best. Also, we'd never miss out on meeting and finding each other.
It's not always the same
no it's never the same
if you don't feel it too.
If you meet me half way
If you would meet me half way.
It could be the same for you.
You know the old expression: It takes two for love(6). It's never the same unless the other person feels it two. Do you feel something for me like I do for you, Duncan? Since, your so in love with Courtney; I'm thinking that I should give up. There's probably no way in the world you'd like me. I mean, I've been waiting for so long for you to just come around and sweep me off my feet in addition to telling me how you've always felt the same. I really should quit daydreaming; nothing good ever comes for it if the other person won't meet you halfway.
If you just realize what I just realized
then we'd be perfect for each other
then we'd never find another
Just realize what I just realized
we'd never have to wonder
Just realize what I just realized
You'd feel the same way about me for sure. I'm positive about it. If you just realized that we are so alike and together; we can make mountains move. We complete each other and yet, you still can't see it. If you gave me the chance, I hope we could stay together forever. If we were together, I'd never wonder or question my love for you. We could stay together for years and all the time, I'd feel so happy and lucky to be with you. First, you would need to realize that Courtney is and will never be the one for you.
If you just realize what I just realized
Oh oh oh oh oh oh
missed out on each other now
missed out on each other now
Realize, realize
realize, realize.
Please, oh please! Someday, just give me the chance. We can't miss out on each other! We will prove everyone wrong who says that we aren't perfect for each other. Please, just for me….. Duncan, can you realize?
AN: I hope you'll all enjoyed it! The song is Realize by: Colbie Callait but, I perfer the other version by: School Boy Humor. I feel bad because I kinda rushed it near the end since it's like 5:00 AM and I've been writing this since 2 AM. Eh, I don't mind much... I hope everyone likes it! Oh yeah! The references, I really should clear all the confusion up now.
(1) - That was a very special day for me with a guy I used to like so that's why I used it! Haha, that was such a loooooong time ago…
(2) - A spoof of a couple at my school. I just had to include them. I don't know why though lol XD
(3) - The guy I had English with that I liked this year!
(4) - A guy who I used to really like
(5) - I really couldn't think of anything so I kinda use a part of another song for that. The song is called: "Like We Used To" by: A Rocket To The Moon. I'm in love with that song! I do not own it lol! I'm just putting that in case anyone finds something wrong with that.
(6)- I just made that up! I have no clue if it is an actual quote :P
Disclaimer: I do not own any of the things mentioned in this story. I do not own Total Drama but If I did, then I totally would have made HUGE changes! :D
I hope you all liked the story and please: Review! The keep me inspired :D