Time stopped. He was so cold...but his hands... The crimson warmth was sliding between his fingers, down his wrists, falling to the floor. His faster, his father basically, was sprawled on the floor, the same crimson warmth flowing freely from his still body.

Kouryuu fell to his kness, eyes wide, body shaking.

"Master Sanzo!!" he screamed in agony, tears falling freely, quickly mixing with the dark blood on his hands.

Sanzo bolted up in bed, sweating, panting. Behind him, the drone of the rain was practically deafening. Loosening his grip on the bedsheets, he glanced out the window, holding back an uncharacteristic whimper. The smallest shuffle made his body go rigid, and in an automatic reaction, he reached for his banishing gun on the windowsil.

"It's just me, calm down," came a soft, almost heavenly voice. Calming some, Sanco turned, seeing Hakkai standing in the doorway. "Can you not sleep either?"

"No..." he sighed. "It must be the rain."

"Yes, I'm sure it is." Hakkai made his way to Sanzo's bed, sitting on the very edge, next to the priest. "We're both never too keen on rainy weather, huh?"

Sanzo shook his head and sighed, turning to look back out the window. It was odd how Hakkai's presence always calmed him, even under such circumstances. It had always been that way. As confused as it made him, he couldn't deny that he was grateful.

But why? What was it about him that was so different than the monkey and the water sprite - apart from the obvious.

"Sanzo, did you hear me?" Hakkai asked, pulling him away from his thoughts.

"Sorry," he muttered, turning back to face him again. "What did you say?"

"I was asking if you wanted coffee or anything."

He shook his head. "No, I'm fine."

They sat in silence for a moment, Sanzo lighting up a cigarette. Hakkai glanced down, looking at the palms of his hands, thinking. He opened and closed his mouth a few times, as if wanting to say something, but unable to get it out. The priest noticed, but decided to say nothing.

"S-sanzo?" he finally got out, his voice soft.

"Hmm?" came the reply, Sanzo raising his eyebrows.

"There's...there's something I've been wanting to tell-"

He wasn't able to say anything more, because Sanzo's door burst open, Goku tumbling in angrily.

"Sanzo!! This bastard won't let me sleep!" he complained loudly, pointing an accusing finger at Gojyo, who had his hands shoved in his pockets.

"Well, he keeps snoring!" the half-demon growled. "So I need to do something to amuse myself!"

"By drawing on my feet?!"

"It was the closest thing!"

"I can't believe I got stuck rooming with you AGAIN!"

"Will both of you just shut up?!" Sanzo screamed, shooting a bullet between their heads. "I'm sick of this, day after day after day! If you don't stop fighting for five minutes I'll kill both of you! Now GO TO SLEEP!!"

Grumbling, the two shuffled out before they got shot at again. Hakkai sighed and shook his head. Sanzo's eye twitched.

"Anyway," he said, putting down his gun. "What were you saying?"

"It's...nothing," he said quickly, standing up. "I'll let you get back to sleep."

He got up and left the room before Sanzo could say anything, leaving the blonde quite confused.

"Stupid..." Hakkai muttered to himself as he walked back to his room. "I'm so stupid..."

He walked into his room, slamming the door shut behind him. He stared at his hands before walking over and falling onto his bed.

"With her blood on my hands, I can never love again, huh?" he muttered to himself, closing his eyes. "I'm so pathetic I amaze myself."

He opened hiseyes again and stared out at the rain. It was always raining these days. The more it rained, the more he thought about things. The more he wanted to brood.

But the worst part? The more he found himself falling in love with Sanzo. And that was just no good. He couldn't do that, not to himself, not to Sanzo, not to the mission. After all, the last time he'd fallen in love...she had killed herself right in front of him. Not to mention that Sanzo's last close relationship had ended in bloodshed as well.

He was falling deep in love with Sanzo. Could he tell him?