A/N : Might change the title!
I walked down the street from my house, no idea where I was going. Just walking. Hoping to clear my head. Get the pain out of my mind. Life suck, then you die. That was something my old best friend, Jacob, had used to say. He is the only one I have ever trusted with my life. Now we haven't talked on months. Suddenly one day he stopped talking to me, never returned my calls, and was never home. I don't even know why. This was really confusing. So when my mum told me she had found a sweet house in Jacksonville, I had joined her and Phil at once. Not even considering how Charlie would be hurt. Not caring either. I sent him mails now and then. Same with Jacob, without any answers though.
At least one thing he had been right about. Life does suck. Hopefully I would die any moment, not having to go through this shitlife of mine. I had changed a lot since I moved from Forks. Most people would call me emo, and they were probably right. I always wear black and some crazy colour. I didn't go with many people, but some few. And they were mostly like me. It was Janice, Carolis and Julia was my best friends so far. I didn't trust them 100%, but that didn't matter to me anymore. If it was something, it's usually best just to keep it for myself.
But life goes on. Wanna know about my life? It's not a happy life, but who has a perfect life anyway? At least not me.
I'm 18. I live in Jacksonville, Florida, and I have been moving a few times the last 3 years.
My mum Renee remarried with Phil, a minor league baseball player, and they decided to hit the road. I moved from Phoenix to Forks. Forks sucks, it's horrible there. Nothing to do and it rains as well as all the time. I moved away after living there less than a year. Now I live in Jacksonville with my erotic mother and her stupid husband Phil. It started out okay. I had lived with them before, before I moved to Forks, but that wasn't long. So I hadn't got the chance to see the bad side of Phil. If I had, I probably would've just stayed in Forks. Although I hate it there, I couldn't hate it more than I hate Phil.
Phil. Just the name gave me pain. He had a problem with controlling his anger, which was what Renee called it. I can't say that was the problem. And if it was, that still don't give him the right to hit me. And abuse me at all. He meant I deserved it. I couldn't make up my mind for why I did, but I just took it. In the beginning I had told him to go to hell, but that had just made it all worse. Now, it was just to hold myself together.
My friends never asked any questions on how I got the bruises. How I managed to break my hand. How I managed to break my rib, etc. I told every teacher it was just because I was clumsy. And I was clumsy, indeed. Every day was a living hell.
Like my mum cared about me. She was too sucked up to Phil and his excuses. Fuck him. He was twisting her around his little finger, and she knew it. He was screwing her, and she enjoyed that more than anything else, and that why she didn't give a shit about me.
That's how I started to cut myself. One deep cut every time he hurted me. It made me think of the pain in my arm rather than the pain in any other place that he had given me. I was dizzier though, 'cause of the blood loose. But I didn't mind. I ditched gym and other lessons as well now and then. I couldn't have gym with my low blood pressure anyway. I would just end up collapsing, and I couldn't let that happen. That would just start the flow of questions.
A\N:
Please comment and tell me what you think! On my first story of Twilight I got a lot of people adding it to favorites, and I liked that, but I would appreciate comments\reviews more! So please! Else I won't finish this story *pff*