Author's Note: So, my creative life has been taken over by all these one shots, but I am continuing Express Yourself I promise. I'm just taking time to get a couple chapters under my belt because the story went in a completely different direction than I had intended and so I really have no idea where it's headed. Anyways, this is my idea of how Jesse's sing off challenge in The Power of Madonna would have gone down had Finn not taken the high road, and with a Puckelberry spin, of course.

Disclaimer: Don't own any of the recognizable material. If I did, Finchel wouldn't have happened...and Beth would be with her daddy cause he's awesome


"Okay, Finn. I know there's a showdown coming, so let's just decide on the arena. Sing off. Parking lot. Five o'clock. Be There." Quinn lets out a gasp and closes her locker in time to watch Jesse's arm tighten around Rachel as the brunette raises a delicate hand to cover a gasp of her own. This is not gonna end well. The blond turns on her heel, trying to plot a way to turn this to her advantage.

She finds Puck waiting at his truck, ready to drive her home as he has everyday since BabyGate and her inescapable move into his family's house. He silently helps her into the truck, glancing over his shoulder to the spot Rachel used to park in, before Jesse StDouche (his words, obviously) started driving her everywhere, not allowing her a moment with the people from 'her old life' as he's come to see it. The former Cheerio doesn't miss the heavy sigh he releases as he slams his door just a little harder than necessary.

This is it, she thinks. This will get Puck out of this...funk, and off my back all the time.

"I heard something kind of interesting in the hall, just now," Quinn knows she's trying too hard to appear nonchalant, but she honestly wants Puck to be happy. They've developed a sort of friendship in the aftermath of BabyGate and she does care about him, no matter what the hormones coursing through her body make her say sometimes.

She continues after his responding grunt, "Jesse was challenging Finn." She sees him shift slightly towards her, knows he's actually listening to her now. "A sing off. Over Rachel, I guess. In the parking lot."

"Whatever." Most people wouldn't notice the bitter edge to the words Puck forces out between clenched teeth, but Quinn has really gotten to know her baby daddy recently.

"Yeah, five o'clock, I think. He seemed pretty set on it. Maybe we could go watch Finn make a fool of himself." She's trying to get a reaction now, even get him to laugh at his former best friend, the boy she loves. Instead he huffs and turns the volume up on the radio.

Puck essentially ignores her while they pick up his sister. He responds only to direct questions, and, while he is more than attentive to her physically, carrying her book bag, helping her down from the raised vehicle, he doesn't interact with either girl beyond asking what they want to snack on until dinner. That's how Quinn knows that she was right about Puck's feelings for Rachel, and she's glad to know she got through to him.

It's just before four when the left tackle hurries down the stairs and stops in front of the two girls. Looking up from her homework, Quinn can't help but smirk at the uncomfortable stance he's taken as he says his sister's name. "Ali? Can I borrow your iPod?"

Alisa Puckerman laughs. She laughs so hard she falls off the couch. The pregnant teen can't really blame her, the thought of Puck wanting to listen to anything on the nine year old's iPod is beyond unexpected, it's ridiculous. But Quinn had learned quickly upon moving into the Puckerman household that Alisa could get away with pretty much anything when it came to her big brother. As far as Puck is concerned, the sun truly does rise and set on her short brunette locks, and so Quinn reins in her own amusement, knowing the two will be giggling about this long after Puck goes back to the school.

The young girl relinquishes her iPod with a questioning glance and turns back to her vocabulary list as Puck drops a kiss on her forehead and heads for the door, keys in hand. He's scrolling through the song list as he pulls on his seat belt and has found the song before he has the truck in gear, pulling away from the curb.

Puck has never been so glad that he hung on every word that fell from Rachel's mouth as he was in this moment. He knows this song will get her attention. She had mentioned this was one of her favorite bands growing up. Sure, the thought of singing one of their songs makes him want to light himself on fire. But it's worth it, if it'll get Rachel to move on from the losers she kept getting so hung up on.

While at a red light he plugs the device into the car stereo and hits play to go through the song a few times before he pulls up to the school. Stopping the music, he pulls towards the circled cars and sees Rachel perched uncomfortably on the hood of StDouche's Range Rover as her current and ex boyfriend slowly circle each other as if they might actually fight. Pulling into an open space between Kurt's Navigator and Mike's F-350, Puck thinks he would be amused if he wasn't so determined to get this over with and win the girl. He doesn't even bother to get out of his truck. He knows how it will play out; StDouche will sing some wannabe badass song warning Finn off, Finn will sing some mushy romantic 'pick me pick me' song and then Puck would sweep in in all his badass glory and blow them both outta the water. Just give it until the count of three...two...

Jesse briefly leans into his car, turning the volume dial to the max and hitting play so the song's gentle opening starts before, "When all is said and done and dead, does he love you the way that I do? Breathing in lightning, tonight's for fighting. I feel the hurt, so physical."

Okay, even Puck is surprised by this one. Not only is Eve6 completely badass, but StDouche is actually doing the song justice.

"Think twice before you touch my girl. Come around, I'll let you feel the burn. Think twice before you touch my girl, come around come around no more. Think twice before you touch my girl. Come around, I'll let you feel the burn. Think twice before you touch my girl, come around no more."

Puck feels his fists clench as VA's former lead lays a possessive hand on Rachel's thigh.

"She spreads her love. She burns me up. I can't let go, I can't get out. I've said enough, enough by now. I can't let go, I can't get out. Wait till the day you finally see, I've been here waiting patiently. Crossing my fingers and my T's, she cried on my shoulder begging please."

Jesse takes a breath and leans up to press a hard kiss to his girlfriend's mouth before continuing.

"Think twice before you touch my girl. Come around, I'll let you feel the burn. Think twice before you touch my girl, come around come around no more. Think twice before you touch my girl. Come around, I'll let you feel the burn. Think twice before you touch my girl, come around no more."

The song dies down then, Jesse feeling as if he's made his point. He stops the music and hops up on the hood of his car, pressing himself into Rachel's side as he wraps a tight arm around her waist. The remaining glee club members, as well as passing football teammates and Cheerios turn toward Finn expectantly.

To his credit, the giant doesn't mess around with music. He goes on his talent and puppy dog eyes as he begins his predictably romantic song. The beginning lyrics don't quite fit, but no one really cares since the song is having the desired effect on the sophomore in question. Puck hates the way her eyes glisten with tears over the tenderness and sincerity in the quarterback's voice.

"Jesse is a friend. Yeah I know he's been a good friend of mine. But lately something's changed that ain't hard to define. Jesse's got himself a girl and I wanna make her mine." Finn didn't bother with dancing around, he simply rocked gently to the beat of the song, clapping his hands against this thighs in lieu of playing his drums, as they weren't currently present.

"And she's watching him with those eyes. And she's loving him with that body, I just know it. And he's holding her in his arms late, late at night."

Fists clenching tightly again, Puck breathes through these lines. He specifically hadn't let himself think of that side of Rachel and Jesse's relationship. Or Rachel and Finn's. Or, well Rachel and anybody who wasn't Puckasaurus. Thankfully, Finn kept singing and was serving as a decent distraction while the mo-hawked boy got a hold of his temper.

"You know I wish that I had Jesse's girl. I wish that I had Jesse's girl. Why can't I find a woman like that?" Finn's voice took on a desperate edge with the last sentence before returning to the soft and smooth voice that had stolen the heart of the heart of New Directions.

"I play along with the charade, there doesn't seem to be a reason to change. You know I feel so dirty when they start talking cute. I wanna tell her that I love her but the point is probably moot." Without realizing it, the tall boy was walking toward the tiny brunette as he sang, standing directly in front of her by the time he sang the word 'love' but before Rachel has a chance to react, he's stalking away again.

"Cause she's watching him with those eyes. And she's loving that body, I just know it. And he's holding her in his arms late, late and night. You know I wish that I had Jesse's girl, I wish that I had Jesse's girl. Why can't I find a woman like that?" The slightly panicked and desperate edge is creeping back into Finn's baritone as he continues, "Like Jesse's girl? I wish that I had Jesse's girl. Why can't I find a woman; why can't I find a woman like that?"

Puck watches as his (former) best friend contorts his impossibly long body until he is staring at his reflection in the side mirror of the Hudson family station wagon.

"And I'm looking in mirror all the, wondering what she don't see in me. I've been funny, I've been cool with the lines. Ain't that the way love's supposed to be?"

Finn rises and sways for a few beats before continuing.

"Tell me! Why can't I find a woman like that?"

The quarterback started walk-dancing around the circle, moving to the music in his head.

"You know I wish that I had Jesse's girl. I wish that I had Jesse's girl! I want Jesse's girl. Why can't I find a woman like that? Like Jesse's girl? I wish that I had Jesse's girl! I want, I want Jesse's girl!"

As he sings out the last of the song, Finn drops to his knees, looking up at the brunette towering over him for the first time. He fights to catch his breath as he watches the light in her eyes brighten and she pulls subtly away from the boy holding her.

Puck twists the volume knob on his own car stereo and figures, It's now or never as he shoves open his door and pushes play. He chuckles to himself as Mike and Matt fall into step behind him once they recognize the beat of the song, since they both know that Puck can't dance and this song requires their sweet moves.

"I was hanging with the fellas. Saw you with your new boyfriend; it made me jealous. I was hoping that I'd never see you with him. But it's all good, cause I'm glad that I met him. Heh."

Puck slaps on his signature smirk as he sees the look on Rachel's face when she hears him singing N-freaking-Sync. He knows that she's thinking how she can't believe he remembers this little fact out of a ridiculously long conversation from when they dated months before. And he knows that he will later have to explain that he hears (and remembers) most every word she says. But for now, he must continue.

"'Cause now I know the competition's very slim to none. And I can tell by looking that he's not 'the one.' He's not the type you said you liked. His style's wack, clothes are bad. Come on girl, let him go. I want you back."

Puck stops less than three feet in front of Rachel, smiling to himself when Finn fumbles to get out his way without being stepped on, and to her because damn straight he's singing this lame ass song because it was one of her favorites of the album. She loved the idea of having someone fight for her, demand her presence back in his life. Seems like she doesn't like the reality so much, but them's the breaks. And he's determined to make sure this is the last time she pays any other guy any attention so he may as well let her enjoy this one display of lameass-ness from her seriously baddass ex (and soon to be again) boyfriend.

"Call me a hater, if you want to. But I only hate on him 'cause I want you. Say I'm trippin' if you feel like. But you without me, ain't right," Puck is happy to hear Chang and Rutherford harmonize like the band does in the actual song. Just a simple 'ain't right' but it totally makes a difference. "You can say I'm crazy, if you want to. That's true- I'm crazy 'bout you. You could say I'm breakin' down inside," and again with an 'inside,' thank you, boys! "Cause I can't see you with another guy!"

Puck jumps back and falls into step with this football teammates as they sidestep and jump around similar to how they all free styled when they joined together for 'Ride Wit Me' and the duo joined him in the chorus. How the hell did they even know this song? He had the excuse of a little sister, and Rachel but still. WTF?

"It makes me ill to see you give, love and attention at his will. And you can't imagine how it makes me feel. To see you, with him. Oh, it makes me ill to see you give, love and attention at his will. And you can't imagine how it makes me feel. To see you, with him."

He steps forward again, holding a hand out to the girl who is slowly making her way off the hood of her boyfriend's car.

"Girl, I know that we broke up. But that doesn't mean you should give the cold shoulder. 'Cause you know that I truly do adore ya, and that other guy can't do nothing for you. Uh, see. I can tell that you don't really love that guy. But there's no need for you to go and waste your time. I think you know I love you more. Girl you gotta let him go. I want you so just give him the boot."

Puck will deny it till the day he dies, but he knows his eyes are pleading with hers. Who would have guess his would turn out to be the 'pick me pick me' song. Shrugging off that thought, Puck stalks toward his girl not stopping until he stands between her spreading knees.

"Call me a hater, if you want to. But I only hate on him 'cause I want you. You can say I'm trippin' if you feel like, but you without me ain't right. You can say I'm crazy, if you want to. That's true- I'm crazy 'bout you. You could say I'm breakin' down inside. 'Cause I can't see you with another guy."

Puck takes her hand in his own and vaguely hears his teammates join in again as he continues with another chorus.

"It makes me ill to see you give, love and attention at his will. And you can't imagine how it makes me feel. To see you, with him. Oh, it makes me ill to see you give, love and attention at his will. And you can't imagine how it makes me feel. To see you, with him."

The gentle, hopeful happiness in Rachel's eyes proves to him, that this is a totally badass move on his part.

"Ohh...It makes me ill 'cause you used to be my girl. Used to be, used to be my girl. Yeahhh. It makes me ill 'cause you used to be my girl. My girl. So baby come back to me."

He tightens his grip on her fingers, ignoring the music as it continues in the background, daring him to finish the song.

"Babe. Come back to me," He repeats the last line, speaking this time. Eyes full of emotion, he tugs gently on her fingers, pulling the all too willing girl into his arms, out of the arms of the guy she risked everything she cared about for. Somewhere in the back of his mind, Puck hears the crowd hoot and holler, maybe even some applause, but all he cared about were the soft arms around his neck as he ducked slightly to capture those smiling lips with his own.

When a breathless Rachel breaks the kiss, she's beaming at him. He can feel a smile on his own face. Not just any smile, he just knows that its the stupid-happy, my-life-doesn't-get-any-better-than-this smile that only she has ever seen. He vaguely sees the Range Rover pull out from behind her, hears the tires squeal sharply as StDouche pulls out faster than necessary. He knows he should turn to Finn, try to make things right now that he's staked his claim on the two girls this friend cares about, but he just can't find it in himself to care while she's in his arms.

Their lips meet again and he forgets everything. Everything but the soft skin of her back as his fingers slide over it, pulling her closer against his front. Everything but the feel of her arms tightening around his neck as she rocks forward onto her toes, tracing the tip of her tongue against his bottom lip. Everything but the moan she lets out as their tongues duel, and how hard it makes him.

They're both gasping for breath when she pulls back, asking the question he's seen dancing in her eyes since he hit play on Ali's iPod.

"NSync? Really?" Her eyes let him know that she is teasing him, but he answers her nonetheless.

"Eh, heard once that the were 'far superior to the other artists of their peak time.' And that that particular song was a very 'romantic way to express all that macho posturing' or whatever it was you said."

"Noah Puckerman, I think you might just be the sweetest guy I know." When she smiles at him like that, there's only one thing he can really say.

"Yeah, yeah. Love you too, babe." He wraps his arm around her shoulders and leads her to his truck and away from the sulking, gentle giant leaning against the hood of the station wagon.