A/N This was inspired by my girl Pierrej92's fun fic Emails of the DME. It's crazy funny and you should check it out right now!
Hermione Granger: Harry, I thought we could perhaps give this new Hogwarts IM out? I must admit, it's a breath of fresh air from the constant use of owls.
Harry Potter: hi! hw gr8 is this?
Hermione Granger: Oh, Harry please do not use 'txt cht', I'm not sure I can cope with deciphering it constantly.
Harry Potter: i make no promisez
Hermione Granger: Why have you spelt 'promises' with a z? What function does the z possess?
[Harry Potter has downloaded the following Hogwarts IM colourscheme from HogwartsIMPORTAL; SLYTHERINSUXRED&GOLD4LYF]
[Harry Potter has changed his nickname to PotterSeek7]
[PotterSeek7 added Ron Weasley to the conversation]
PotterSeek7: Added da 'z' cuz it annoyz u innit
Hermione Granger: Sigh… and 'SLYTHERINSUX', really? That's hardly promoting house unity, is it?
PotterSeek7: ...
Ron Weasley: HULLOOO
Ron Weasley: IM IN THE CHAT
Ron Weasley: HARRY ^^^^& HERMONEY HULLLO
PotterSeek7: Alrite m8?
Hermione Granger: Ron, do you honestly not know how to spell my name?
[Ron Weasley has changed his nickname to KINGWEASLEY]
PotterSeek7: Dnt wry m8 u'll get tha hang o it
KINGWEASLEY: HARRY I THINK MINE IS BROKEN I CAN ' T SEE SOME O F YOUUUR LETTERS IS IT WORK OKLAHOMA ?
KINGWEASLEY: WORKING OKLAHOMA
KINGWEASLEY: WORING O K
KINGWEASLEY: I MISS OWLS
Hermione Granger: You'll get there Ron, just keep practising
KINGWEASLEY: THANKS HERMIO
Hermione: HERMIO?!
KINGWEASLEY: HERMMMMMINISTER
PotterSeek7: HAHAHAHAHAA!
[Hermione Granger added Ginny Weasley to the conversation]
Ginny Weasley: Hi is this Oklahoma
Ginny Weasley: I ATE This thing
PotterSeek7: OMFG LOLLLLL
[Ginny Weasley has changed her nickname to I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease]
PotterSeek7: Nice!
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: Thx!
KINGWEASLEY: POTATO
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: Thx...I think, loser.
Hermione Granger: So I'm the only one without a stupid nickname?
PotterSeek7: U cn b HERMIO-IN-THA-HOUSE-INNIT
Hermione Granger: No, Harry
PotterSeek7: Smack-tht-Hermio-up?
Hermione Granger: Please stop, Harry.
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: HermioTheLeo?
Hermione Granger: I'm not a leo.
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: HermioTheTuxedo?
Hermione Granger: ...
PotterSeek7: Iv gt it
Hermione Granger: Harry...
PotterSkeek7: ...w8 fr it…
PotterSeek7: ...
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: ...baited breath over here!
PotterSeek7: HERMIOTHEBURRITO
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: YES!
KINGWEASLEY: YE S !
Hermione Granger: ...no.
[I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease changed Hermione Granger's nickname to HermioTheBurrito]
PotterSeek7: BBBAHAHAHAHAHA HIGH FIVE GIN!
HermioTheBurrito: What?! Ginny! Why?
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: Can't breath i'm laughing so much, soz Hermio - not even soz!
[HermioTheBurrito changed her nickname to HermioTheBurrito]
[HermioTheBurrito changed her nickname to HermioTheBurrito]
HermioTheBurrito: Ginny it won't change back!
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: I know!
KINGWEASLEY: THI IS DUCKING FUNN Y
PotterSeek7: Literally never been so happy
I'llHaveAGinChaserPlease: *bows*