A/N: I'm venting with this one. And I know I should be working on Come Back to Me, but I'm not really in that kind of mood at the moment. So just bare with me.
Disclaimer: this is fanfiction. FANfiction.
It's the choices we make that define who we are. That statement ate at her. The night he told her, she couldn't stop thinking about it. About what it meant. She wasn't stupid, she knew its meaning, but it was the person who said it that made it eat at her. Even years later, it was still eating at her. Sakura knew what it meant for her. It was her choice to sit on the sidelines and watch Naruto and Sasuke risk their lives. Her choice to not help them, thinking she was a burden. And her choice not to train to not be a burden. She had been too focused on Sasuke.
Sasuke. The name turned her stomach over and made her heart go pitter-patter. It was also her choice to let Sasuke become such a big part of her life. Even if he was on her team, she never should have crossed the boundary with him. She wanted everything with him. It was also her choice to spill her guts the night he left and to not lift a finger to stop him. At that point in time, she foolishly thought that her words would bring him back.
But not her words or Naruto's words could do that. Which lead to another thing that ate at her. Sasuke had told her it was the choices made that define who we are. The night he told her so he wasn't in his right mind, being a little drunk from accidentally drinking sake instead of water. But she knew that he accepted the statement as true; knew it like she knew that the sun would rise in the morning. But what did that say of who Sasuke was?
It was his choice to be cold, emotionless. His choice to break their bonds; to leave and to kill for selfish reasons. What did all that say about who Sasuke was? In an objective point of view, Sasuke would be the bad guy. And he knew it, he accepted it, but he did nothing to stop it. He just went right along with it, because he wanted to do it. Was it similar to the fact that she couldn't stop loving him, like he couldn't stop from killing his brother? They were both choices. She choose to let herself fall for a dark soul, and he choose to follow the darkest path to the end.
He accepted that he was the bad guy, but what did that mean? Did it mean that he still cared about them? That, while he knows he's the bad guy, he's okay with it? It was this that ate at her tonight. She stared at the fire she made in the woods and thought about him. Again. Thought about what would have happened had he made a different choice, become a different person. But Sakura knew it was pointless to dwell on it, she would never get an answer. Not until Sasuke choose to tell her.
She gripped her hair with both hands. Choices, choices, choices. There were so many. How did one set out the stupid ones, the bad ones, the ugly ones, and just make the right ones? Was that even possible? The word had been said in her head so many times that she hardly knew the meaning of it anymore. She was letting him get to her again. She was thinking of something different, if he took a different path. She was saying what if, like it was a possibility and it wasn't. Maybe she should accept, like Sasuke did, that he was the bad guy. The guy that had a price on his head, that was an S-class rouge ninja. But she wouldn't do it. Sakura had to believe that there was something in him that she could recognize.
Something from his past drove him today, it was his clan's murder. But they were from his past too, they shaped his young life as well, so they had given him some of their influence. Sakura wouldn't believe that he was so far gone that she couldn't get to him. Being part of his genin team imprinted them on Sasuke's mind. Because he chose to let them in. He would have died for them at one point, and something like that is something people don't forget. No matter how bad the choices you make are.
She needed something to believe, something to hang on to. So, however foolish it was, she hung onto the fact that he couldn't forget them, that he would always know who they were, and he would always be reminded of how much they had meant to him.
Snap!
Sakura jerked her head up at the small sound, her heart sitting in her throat and stomach dropping from her torso. But she had no reason to fear enemy ninja, because the who was on her mind was now standing right in front of her. His body was hidden in shadow but she could clearly see his silhouette of broad shoulders and spiky hair. With one step he came into the light of the fire she had going. He looked no different than he had at Orochimaru's and it was strange but it gave her comfort.
She swallowed, hoping it would go unnoticed. Subtly she reached to grab a kunai, also hoping it would go unnoticed.
"You think I'm that much of a threat?" Sasuke asked her. Sakura's hand stilled in motion as she kept her eye trained on his own.
"Better safe than sorry," she told him. There was silence after that. Neither moved, they only looked at each other. After a some time Sakura said, "It's been a while."
"So it has," he told her monotone. Silence once more. Sakura took a deep breath, getting tired of his surprise.
"What do you want?" she asked.
Sasuke sat down on the other side of the fire. Sakura never removed her gaze from the lethal ninja.
"What makes you think I want anything?" Sasuke told her, a tone of weariness came forth that he couldn't suppress.
"You don't blindly seek me out for no reason, nor would you stumble upon me by accident. I'm not a fool, Sasuke," Sakura attacked. For years she had chased him and now he was chasing her. Oh, the irony.
"You know what I'm after, Sakura, I don't need to explain it," Sasuke insisted, he was glaring her down. And she knew it, but she wouldn't give in. Sakura stared at him right back.
"What, in your right mind, makes you think I'd give it to you?" she said with a slight sneer she couldn't suppress. All these years had left a bitter taste in her mouth and she couldn't help but single him out with it.
"Because, you know I'll kill you and take it anyway. So, let's save ourselves the trouble and just hand it over," Sasuke demanded. Sakura looked into his face and could find no trace of him bluffing.
It's the choices we make that define who we are.
Again, that line repeated in her head. And again, she wished she had never heard it. All at once she saw her opportunity. Right now was the time to ask him what he meant and he would have to answer or he wouldn't get the scroll he wanted.
"Once, someone told me, that we're defined by the choices we make. So, what does that make you?" Sakura gently asked him. It gave her a reaction. His eyes narrowed, his body stiffened and she saw his jaw clench. He remembers, she thought was a great deal of satisfaction.
"An avenger," was his short reply.
"I'd say murderer," she accused him.
"What do you know about murder?" he shouted at her. She jumped a little, not knowing he would yell. She instantly felt ashamed.
"I'm a ninja, Sasuke, I know what it looks like. And I know what it does to people," she told him, soothingly.
"Stop trying to be my shrink," Sasuke demanded. Sakura raised her chin.
"It destroys people, Sasuke. And you're repaying murder with murder, what kind of person does that make you?" she stressed. Sasuke unclenched and clenched his jaw. Sakura wouldn't give until he gave her an answer.
"You wouldn't understand," he sneered at her.
"Because you won't let me," she retorted. They were glaring at each other over the fire so fiercely it was a wonder that the flame didn't die down in submission.
"What kind of person would I be if I didn't do this?" Sasuke demanded of her.
"A forgiving one." He snorted.
"A weak one, then. That's all Konoha is about, is forgiveness," he stated. Sakura grabbed fist-fulls of grass to keep her hands from punching his face.
"Maybe it takes the bigger man to walk away and stop the trend of murder than to get revenge for a wrong committed against him," Sakura suggested to him softly.
"Sakura, give me what I'm after or I will have to kill you," Sasuke told her just as softly. The tone was so light, but the words so heavy in her chest.
"Would you? We were at the Academy together, the same genin squad, and you're just going to kill me over information?" Sakura accused him of. Her hands let go of the crushed grass by her hips.
"I've killed over less."
"But I'm more than that. Have you really broken that bond?" Sakura wondered. She stared him dead in the face, not having any power to look away.
"Haven't I already proven that?" he asked, exasperation lining his tone.
"If you do, my face will haunt you forever. You can kill me, Sasuke, and you can break every bond you've ever had, but that won't erase your memories or what you felt for us back then," Sakura told him. In a blur, Sasuke stood and drew his sword, placing it over the fire and at Sakura's neck.
Sakura made no move to leap out of the way. She sat staring up at his cool, black eyes. The part of the sword over the fire, grew red hot and started edging out from the middle.
"Give me the scroll," Sasuke demanded. Cold, hard steel was in his voice now. She had him, if only for a moment, and now she lost him. Again.
"No," she defied. She rose as well, but her height was nowhere near as tall as his, but she refused to sit back and die.
Sasuke walked around the fire, keeping the sword to her neck, and stopped when he was standing in front of her. The red hot part of his sword was cooling off, and steam sizzled between their glaring faces.
"Sakura, I would rather not have you're blood on my hands," he said.
"Why not? You've had everyone else's on your hands," Sakura scorned. Sasuke seemed to glare at her even harder and she felt the air around her go chilly. "Go ahead, if I die, I'd only have one regret."
"Well spit it out before you lose your head," Sasuke told her, tightening his grip on the katana.
"That you'll live you're life for the death of your brother and be lost once you have killed him," Sakura told him.
Shock pressed on his face, but he blocked it out. However, his grip loosened on his blade. Sakura looked to his hand on the handle, then to his face. She felt something electric shock her body, and realizing it wasn't the chidori, she found out that she was anticipating. Sasuke's face was only a few inches from hers' and she could easily kiss him. Hell, it even looked like he wanted her too.
Instead, she put her hand in her pouch, drew out a scroll, and put it in between her face and his face. Startled, Sasuke backed away, but soon realized that she was giving him his information. Sasuke reached out and took it, surprised that she didn't pull it away from him. Quickly, he opened it and scanned for the whereabouts of his brother. Sasuke found what he wanted, rolled the scroll and gave it back to Sakura.
He looked at her, hard. Sakura felt like kissing him, just once wouldn't hurt. But it would hurt, it wouldn't be just one kiss. And Sasuke nodded, he understood it that it would turn to more than one kiss, should they lip-lock. Sakura watched as Sasuke turned his back on her and walked away. How long would it be until she met him again? Soon? Never? No, Sakura wouldn't be able to handle that. She had to say something, anything, to his retreating back.
"Sasuke!"
He stopped, half turned and faced her.
"I still love you," she told him. For a second there was no change on his face. Then the side of his lips curved into a smirk. It wasn't the cold ones, this smirk had warmth spread from her chest to her entire body. It was the smirk of the Sasuke she knew. He was still in there and she smiled.
Sasuke turned back around and started walking. "I know."
Her smile grew. Yeah, she'd see him again. She'd make sure of it. This was not over.
A/N: I like how it came it out. It was short, but also kind of sweet. And I don't mind the length being so short. Review if you read.